Bedsharers, please share your bedtime routine.

SarahC720

The pedi told us we "need" to put LO to bed before we go and get her into a different routine than we currently have.....she doesn't know that we bedshare (pretty sure she wouldn't be into that)....she just thinks we co-sleep in the same room, and DD is in her RNP.  Currently, she hangs with us until we go to bed...she falls asleep, usually on the Boppy after nursing, around 9pm and then will wake up as DH and I are going upstairs and getting ready for bed around 11pm.  Then we have our bedtime routine and all go to sleep in the "family" bed.  DH and I are perfectly happy with how things are going, but the pedi  told us that if we don't change now we will have  "big" problems later on.  She also said that DD should be sleeping 9-6 "no problem" and should not be waking to nurse....and that I should let her put herself back to sleep without offering to feed her.  I honestly don't mind feeding her during the night - since we bedshare, it's very peaceful and not a bother at all.  Until today I have been very happy with our pedi....so I don't really know anymore.  I don't really expect my EBF 4 month old to go 9 hours without eating....but I am a first timer so maybe I don't get it.

So I am just wondering what other bedsharers are doing.  I appreciate your sharing 

AliciaCM

find a new pedi... lol

if it's working for you then go for it! I don't understand why someone would think you need to change a routine that's working for you...

jkkg317

Babies can take a year to sttn from what I've heard, if he's eating he's hungry right? idk this is my first to, I usually put him in the pnp first and then when he wakes I just pull him to bed with me , I try to put him back into the pnp if I wake up because I feel like I sleep better if I'm not worried about him being smushed or falling off the be or all the things ppl yell at you for bed sharing over, but I love having him close to me

ladybug8510

I'm lurking, but when I told my pedi DD was doing 1 5 hour stretch at night, he said that was pretty good.  I think expecting her to go that long without feeding isn't realistic.

We have a similar routine.   DD is with us until around 9:30 - 10pm.  Then I put her in her jammies, do vit d, lotion, etc. and she plays in bed for a little while, while I'm on the laptop or reading or whatever.  For some reason she gets fussy in the living room and seems tired, but won't fall asleep right away.  After about 20-30 min of play time, she starts rubbing her eyes and fussing a little, and I nurse her to sleep.  Then I usually continue on the computer or reading for a little while.

If it works, go with it!

serenegreen57

Your routine sounds a lot like ours.  I try to put E down for bed around 8 or so, but it usually just ends up being a short nap and then she'll hang out with DH and I until we go to bed around 10.  Sometimes she falls asleep while we are hanging out and then wakes up again a bit while were brushing our teeth etc...  As soon as we all lay down, she falls right back to sleep!  E still nurses a couple times a night, and like you since we bedshare its very peaceful and I dont really lose sleep over it.  If its working for you I wouldn't change it!

anderson_moore2008

I agree with pp everything I have read especially about bf babies say that it can be more than a year until they sttn.  DD will usually do 5-6 hours from somewhere after 10pm(so from 10-4 or 12-6)  She has only done longer than 6 hours once or twice only only done longer than 8 once when she had her jabs.  Like you said I am happy with it because she always goes right back off to sleep and it is always a good feed not a 5 mins on and then up an hour later for more.  Go with what works for you!

Another Jennifer

When DD was about 7 months old, I decided that we needed to establish a bedtime routine for her.  We were keeping her up way too late.  I was so surprised that it was successful and made a difference for her.  Now we start our bedtime routine at 7 PM every night.  That's when we put the toys up and then I put her in her nighttime diaper and pajamas.  Then we say prayers and I read her 2 books.  Then I start rocking her.  On an average night, she's sound asleep by about 7:35.  I put her in the crib by our bed and DH and I stay awake for a few more hours.  When we go to bed, DD will usually wake up and we pull her into our bed where she spends the rest of the night. 

I can't tell you what a difference this made in our lives.  Now we have about 2 hours a night to ourselves.  I've got time to do laundry and pick up around the house and do some work if I need to.  We turn the TV on (we never turn it on when DD is awake).  I also think it was good for her because she started getting more sleep at night.  Even though we bedshare most of the night, I do believe that DD sleeps a little bit better when we're not there distracting her.  

 

SteelCityBride

I think your routine sounds fine. If it works for you, that's all that matters. 

I generally nurse E on our bed between 7-9, whenever I can tell he's ready for bed & he falls asleep.  He sleeps on our bed while we stay up a while longer & then when we come to bed I either move him to our sidecarred crib, or he stays in bed with us, whatever we feel like that night. 

Regardless, he wakes to nurse anywhere between 2-5am & I nurse him in bed.  DH & I are both comfortable with our arrangment & it makes DS happy, so I see no reason to change what we are doing. Even if my pedi would object (I don't share this information with them because I don't really want their opinion on our decisions).

So once again, if it's working for you, don't let your pedi *insist* that you change what you are doing.  It's your baby, not your pedi's!

anderson_moore2008

Sorry did not post but DD goes to sleep between 6-8 depending on when her last nap of the day was and when she is showing signs of being tired.  She will then wake between when she goes to sleep and 10-12 depending on how early/late she fell asleep after that is when she does the 5-6 hour stretch.  So a typical night might be:

6pm DD shows signs of being tired change into PJ and nurse to sleep asleep by 6.30 in our bed.

10pm I hear DD stir if she does not settle herself I go and nurse her back to sleep.

10-11pm I go to bed and usually but not always move DD to crib which is in our room.

12pm DH comes to bed (works late so needs time to unwind after work)

4am DD wakes and I feed in bed depends on how fidgety DD is as to whether I leave her in bed or move her back to crib when she falls back sleep.

7-8.30am DD wakes and we have snuggle time in bed talking and singing songs and cuddles from Daddy and then a feed and we are up for the day.

lgmom2010

I don't think you should change your routine if it is working for you.

Our bedtime routine is never the same every night...so I guess we really don't have one....usually DD falls asleep when I'm wearing her sometime btwn 6 and 10. Sometimes I just wear her until we go to bed at 10 and I can lay her in her PnP or sometimes I try to earlier. If she sleeps in her PnP then she comes into bed with us after she wakes up. If she is awake when we go to bed then I nurse her to sleep in bed with us. We usually just play it by ear every night and go with what works for her the best