I am supposed to be 20 weeks by now...

Megg327

We miscarried in September and if I were still pregnant I would just be hitting the 20 week mark...I know it's not good to think about that, but I have a friend that was only 2 weeks behind me and I can't even talk to her because I get so upset. I am still so emotional about our miscarriage. I have gone to some support groups and they have helped a little. DH thinks that I am over emotional at this point and I don't think he understands how hurt I still am. I think what makes this situation even harder is that I still have not gotten my period and it has now been over 10 weeks. RE wants me to make an appointment if I dont get it by the end of this week.

 How do you ladies handle this? I think it's just the holiday season that has me down. I just need to find something that will keep me busy, but so far have not had any luck.

 Sorry for the vent...I just do not have anyone to talk to that has gone through this before.

 

Parzia74

I'm so sorry Meg- I know exactly what you're going through. Since my m/c, three of my friends have posted on their facebook pages that they're all pregnant and due in June... Same time I was due. It's like being kicked when you're already down- there's just no better way to describe it. We just have to fight through the pain, get back up, and keep pushing on.

 I see we're also neighbors... I'm in Forks Township (Easton). I actually went to Valley Perinatal in Bethlehem the week before my m/c.... they told me I was perfectly healthy and my pregnancy would be excellent.  Not sure I can ever go back there again.

But I'm here if you need someone to talk to. PM me if you wanna chat!

Gaberinos

I am so sorry for your loss. I have also had a hard time lately and my husband doesn't quite understand why. It has only been three weeks since my miscarriage and I just had a D & C Tuesday. I had my own experience with Dr.'s not giving us answers and even throwing out diagnosis' that were quite scary. At that point I went to a new clinic with more compassionate Dr's and staff that were able to almost give me answers immediately and tell me the other Dr. was wrong about other his other assumptive diagnosis'. This is a rough thing to go through, but all of us on here have had our own experiences and there are a lot of supportive and friendly people on here. We are all here for each other. If you need anything don't hesitate to share your feelings. Again, I am very sorry that you have had to go through this.  

haziedaze

One day at a time... that's the only advice I have. Sometimes its one hour at a time on bad days. I also keep super busy- not sure if that's a good thing, but it works. I have a coworker 2 weeks ahead and another 2weeks behind where I should have been. The one behind me is starting to get a bump and it makes me so sad. She had just found out she was pregnant when I was telling her my bad news. Hang in there, and know you're not alone. It just plain svcks to go through what we've been through! ((HUGS))

Megg327

Thank you ladies for your kind words

 

LisaBVH

I'm so sorry and I feel your pain. I would have been 13 wks on Thursday and it's so hard to get out of the mind-set that we're not pregnant anymore. Just hang in there. (((hugs)))

samanthahollman

Sorry for your loss Megs. 

I would have been near 20 weeks as well. It seems every time I log onto FB someone is posting that they are pregnant or just found out what they are expecting.  Not to mention, two of my cousins are pregnant and one just had a baby. =o(

Just hang in there. It will get better.  

mgduke19

I'm so sorry you're having a tough time. I also think about how far along I should be. I should have been 26 weeks yesterday. Instead, I am almost 6 weeks without our DD. It sucks for sure, but I find that the busier I keep myself, the better off I am. It's the waves of grief without warning that really kill me, but I would rather miss my DD then never to have had her at all. Hope things start getting a little easier for you. (((HUGS)))

HandR63

You're not alone in this and it's hard for others to understand that haven't gone through it.  It's also hard for my DH to understand sometimes given the hormones involved, but he knows that there is that added element for me to deal with that he doesn't feel. 

I also found that it's hard to recoup emotionally when you're still dealing with the physical recouping.  I had the opposite problem of bleeding (brown) almost continuously (lightly mostly) for two months.  It really did take a toll on me emotionally since I really just wanted my body to get back to normal.  I finally stopeed bleeding for a few weeks and then had a second m/s and have so far stopped bleeding after that for over a week.  It is so relieving that in three months now since the D&C my body seems to be back to normal (I hope).  Now I feel better emotionally as a result.  If you're not getting answers from your current RE, I'd seek out another one.  10 weeks seems like a long time.  For me, it would be worth it for emotional reasons alone.

I can also relate to the holidays being harder and to others being near where I would have been.  I just hosted a baby shower yesterday for my sister who is 2 weeks ahead of where I would have been.  Thanksgiving dinner conversation was all about baby names and everyone else talking about their pregnancy stories and about being moms.  I found myself seeking out an empty room at one point to get away.  It's hard since I don't want to be a downer for my sister who is (and should be) excited, but I can't ignore my own feelings either.  Guess my attempt at the situation is to be quiet and stand offish.