Eco-Friendly Family
Getting nervous - do people *really* survive labor and delivery??
We're due two weeks from today, and I had a little meltdown over it.
Do people *really* survive this? And can I really do this without any pain meds? I feel like I'm going to die, and I feel so trapped! There's no way out!
Break it down for me. Really, I'm just looking at managing pain and then pushing when it's time. Right??? (I use the term "just" loosely.)
Tell me we're going to live through this.
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Re: Getting nervous - do people *really* survive labor and delivery??
I am a L&D nurse and people survive it every day. I help women through it every time I am at work.
Go into it with an open mind and do whatever your body tells you to do. We were made to do this.
GL!!!!!!!!
Yes maam.
I was at 8-10 minutes from 5:30am-8pm when I suddenly went to every 3-4 minutes. They quickly went to a frequency that I can only describe as %*#)%^@ and when we were admitted at 9:30 I was at a 9. I couldn't have pain meds even if I wanted them. I went into it wanting a natural birth but we were waiting on the oncall doctor to finish at a different hospital and I started asking the nurses for a shot of tylonel to take the edge off, lol!! When they finally let me push it felt GOOD. I wanted to push. Transition was the hardest part and I nearly broke my husbands hand. I could barely get a breath between contractions and the on call doctor was my least favorite in the practice. Every time I opened my eyes she was just sitting there across the room staring at my crotch and scowling. She told me that she was going to have to cut me because I couldn't stretch any more and I told her no, she told me again "BUT YOU'll TEAR." I'd rather tear. "Fine, have it your way." and she went back to sitting and scowling.
I don't remember any pain after his head was out. My doula tells me that the doctor was apologizing and gave me 3 or 4 shots when she repaired my tiny tear.
They asked if I wanted anything when we were moved to our room so they gave me some Aleve. The next day I was more swollen and they gave me Aleve and T3. That's all I needed.
You *will* survive this. I remember telling my husband that it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I have to admit, it made me feel really cocky and even though it hurt to waddle to the potty I felt like I could take over the world with my awesomeness.
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although of course there is a possibility that things may not go as planned, I agree that in general, our bodies are made for this, and that women do it everyday and have been for thousands of years.
My labor and delivery were so different and easier than I'd anticipated, that one of the first things I said once he was born was "that's it?" -- seriously, it's not always the traumatic and painful experience that our culture makes it out to be. The adrenaline and hormone rush you get after is amazing, and you feel like a superhero, so a lot of the pain I think is immediately forgotten or blurred by that and the sight of your LO.
Your body is an amazing and powerful instrument - don't be afraid to harness it!
Well, my mom did, and her mom before her, and her mom before her... in fact, I have it on good authority that I come from a long line of women who successfully made it through labor and childbirth.
FWIW, the most inspiring stories I've heard from natural birthers all are about listening to your body and following your gut and what that baby is telling you. Know that your body can do this - just trust it! You can do it!
not only did i survive, i wanted to do it again. i even said i'd do it every day, it's such an amazing experience. of course, that's a little bit extreme but i did get a natural high from it. pain during, sure, but nothing that couldn't be dealt with in the right frame of mind.
good luck! you will be holding your baby soon!
Labour and deliver isn't easy, but it really wasn't that bad. My labour was hard and fast. The morning I went into labour I had a DR's appt, I was not even dillated at all. That night my water broke at 6:00 at night, contractions came soon after. They started pretty slow, so slow that I didn't even know if we should head to the hospital (45 minute drive). I started slowly getting ready, showered, shaved etc. All the while talking to my hubby about how I wanted to stop at Tim Hortons on the way haha. By the time we got in the car (around 9ish) there was no stopping. It came on very hard at that point. Got to the hospital and I was 7 cm and in transition. I tried the tub, wasn't doing anything for me. At that point I took some laughing gas. It was the perfect thing for me. It allowed my body to do what it needed, it brought my focus inward. I still felt the pain, it just loosened me up, helped me let go of any inhibitions. I didn't care if I was making weird noises, what position I was in etc. They had me labouring and pushing in so many positions (she was turned sideways). I started pushing around 11:30, best feeling in the world! At 1:54 she was born.
Just go in with an open mind and thinking "I can do this!" I was so nervous and anxious too. I think most people are when you do not know what to expect. If the pain gets to the point that you cannot manage it naturally, do what you feel is right. They do not hand out medals in the end if you did it naturally. Some people are just better ale to tolerate pain than others.
I had a vaginal unmedicated birth with the twins and I would do it again tomorrow. It was an incredible experience. Contractions only got painful for me when I was 9cm. Pushing was hard, I pushed for 3 hours, Oliver was coming out crooked and they ended up using the vac on him...
The worse part for me was getting stitched up afterwards...
Just remember to breath and focus on this new baby coming into your life.
It's amazing how your body does what it needs to do. I had a homebirth and it was absolutely incredible. I also had back labor, which (to be completely honest) was absolutely excruciating. The contractions in my abdomen were never worse than menstrual cramps. Easy peasy. Back labor? Awful.
At least, awful until DH started applying counterpressure just where I needed it. And just like that, it was manageable again. So yes, you will live.
You'll find what works for you at the time. (I loved rocking in our Amish rocking chair.)
And before you know it, you have an amazing baby in your arms and none of what came before matters! (Oh, and I'm already looking forward to doing this again...and J. is only 3 1/2 months old!)
Yep, that's it!
It may sound harsh, but whenever I felt nervous about L&D, I thought about all the weak, lazy women that I know who have had babies. If they could do it, I knew I could!
Before I had DD, I thought the advice to only think about one contraction at a time was not very helpful. But while I was in labor, I realized that's really the trick. Just take it one contraction at a time. Don't try to think about anything other than the present. (BTW, I was in labor for nearly 24 hours, so if it worked for me, it can work for anyone!) Just do whatever gets you though the contraction.
My one big peice of advice, when it's time to push - look ONLY at the doctor giving you directions to push! Follow their directions closely. It's tempting to just push like crazy to have it all done, but resist the urge!
And please, please, please be open to whatever happens. It really breaks my heart when women who "planned" a med-free, vaginal birth beat themselves up over "failing." It's a natural experience, just take it as it comes.
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its ok. ::deep breaths:: i had the same fears right before DD was born. it felt so overwhelming and just a HUGE fear that attacked me.
i had the same fears of being a mother and caring for a newborn while i was in labor... i cried the whole time to our nurse (who lovingly held my hand and told me that because i was feeling this way, i'd obviously be a great mom. lol)
its truly a fear of the unknown. and advice from those that have already been there is tough to take, but i know you can do it.
L&D is the biggest fear i had. this tiny itty bitty baby grew so BIG and how the he!! was i going to get it out?
but talk to your DH and try to have a plan, spend some time focusing on your options (emergency and non-emergency) have a fall back plan if you decide you want some relief.
your fears are not un-founded. its just your body (and mind) way of trying to prepare you mentally for child birth, making you prepare yourself for this huge change in life.
but like PP said, take it one step at a time. the good news is its NOTHING like the movies. there are lots of people to support you and unlike the movies, its not total utter pain for 12-14 hours, it comes in waves, and then goes...
you CAN do this. ::hugs::