WHY oh WHY did I have a tubal ligation?

KimRN

I really thought in my heart of all hearts that I was done.  We have a DD who will be 4 in 10 days!  We had to have and IUI with the third pregnancy and had our most amazing little baby girls!  They will be 10 months this week.  I feel like I truely made a HUGE mistake!  I want another baby!  I don't know if it's because I can't or if it's because the twins are growing SO fast.  I know that it doesn't help that everyone around me is pregnant. 

My DH says I woulnd't have been able to talk him into another.  Then all of a sudden yesterday tells me that he doesn't know if it was a dream or if he was really thinking about it but was thinking he wanted another.  We had so much trouble getting pregnant with the twins we both thought that was it.  Now I'm not so sure.  Age is getting to be a factor.  I will be 35.  I feel like I am being very selfish.  I do not think that we will do anything with this urge.  I just needed to talk about it and see if anyone else has gone through this.

tpandr08

I have not gone through what you are going through but I know what baby fever is like!  Riley will be 11 months Friday and I balled my eyes out the whole way down the driveway putting her 1st bday invites in the mail Monday.  Just give it a couple weeks.  You may grow out of that feeling... Sorry that is not much help but I am sorry you are feeling that way.

 ::hugs::

rodgersonmumma

Just the other day I had a little mini-panick attack about this. I KNOW I am done, but something about the fact that I can't get pregnant again just started to worry me. What if something happend to one of my kids? What if I get divorced and then fall in love with another man who has no children of his own and wants one? What if I wake up one day when my kids are all independant and dont need me as much and I decide I want another one?

However, none of those things are likely to happen. We can barely afford the children we have right now, and we will have to send them to college and help them with things like first cars and such. We don't (and won't in the future) have room for any more children. We have our boy and our girl and we are done.

I think it is normal to second guess any major life changing decision. I know deep down though that we made the right choice.

xnbride

the decision to expand the family is so tough and there are so many variables to factor in. I go through periods of longing, to ambivalence, to certainty, to uncertainty. I think it is very normal. I would love to grow our family more but I also know that it is out of my control.

You can also reverse the procedure if it is something that you are both on board with, otherwise, look to the future. Think about all the family vacations you will be able to take because you can afford them, college tuitions to pay for,  weddings etc. There is a time and season for everything. Focus on the next phase in your life. Look back with fondness and not regret.

Tonya_G

DH got snipped, and my sister just had a baby. I totally feel your pain. Part of me would love to have another child... but it's just not feasible for us. I just keep in mind that if down the line, I still have the urge to mother a child and mine are gone, there are plenty of children in foster care who would give anything to be in a loving home.

mcbray21

xnbride:

the decision to expand the family is so tough and there are so many variables to factor in. I go through periods of longing, to ambivalence, to certainty, to uncertainty. I think it is very normal. I would love to grow our family more but I also know that it is out of my control.

You can also reverse the procedure if it is something that you are both on board with, otherwise, look to the future. Think about all the family vacations you will be able to take because you can afford them, college tuitions to pay for,  weddings etc. There is a time and season for everything. Focus on the next phase in your life. Look back with fondness and not regret.

shadowboxerkd

mcbray21:

xnbride:

the decision to expand the family is so tough and there are so many variables to factor in. I go through periods of longing, to ambivalence, to certainty, to uncertainty. I think it is very normal. I would love to grow our family more but I also know that it is out of my control.

You can also reverse the procedure if it is something that you are both on board with, otherwise, look to the future. Think about all the family vacations you will be able to take because you can afford them, college tuitions to pay for,  weddings etc. There is a time and season for everything. Focus on the next phase in your life. Look back with fondness and not regret.

Also, think about how much more quality time you'll get your babies. We plan on having more, and I'm looking forward to being pregnant again, but part of me is sad that it won't just be me and LO anymore. I kind of wish I could just focus on and enjoy watching her grow into a little girl. It'll be different once another baby comes into the picture.