Baby shower- how to RSPV...

MCH77

I just recieved an invite for a baby shower for Dec 5 (my 1st EDD was Dec 4).  Now that I am pg, I'd like to think that I could go, but just seems like it could be too much.  I told DH I didn't know if I wanted to go, he says "why no, you are pg now?"  Boys don't get it sometimes. 

I plan waiting to RSVP, maybe as it get closer I will be feeling better about this pg and want to go.  If not, I know the girl with understand, she was get with my m/c.

I guess there is no real point to this post, just needed to get it out.  It just makes me sad. Thanks ladies. 

magdalina.h

My best friend's shower is next weekend and I'm terrified. She's my best friend so of course I'm going and she will totally understand if I have to excuse myself.

Galena99

I actually turned down a baby shower because it was right after my loss and before I was pregnant again.  I was honest with my friend and said that because of my m/c I wasn't comfortable being around all of the baby stuff.  She understood completely and I am planning on seeing her during Thanksgiving where I will give her a gift for her new little one. 

It's a tough situation and just don't try to please other people and not yourself. 

MCH77

Thanks ladies... I have some time so I think I am going to wait to decide.  I just needed to get the idea off my chest.

grr_aargh

I would RSVP honestly, especially if this friend was good through your m/c.  RSVP yes, and then, should you need to send regrets later, I'm sure she'll understand. 

Irishsapphire

Congrats on your BFP!  I am so excited for you.   

With my 2nd pregnancy that ended in a miscarriage, I had an EDD of December 7th.  With my 3rd pregnancy, my EDD was July 28th.  The first trimester was a little stressful for me, because I had brown spotting.  But at least I was on progesterone and baby aspirin (due to recurrent pregnancy loss tests).  I was really thankful that I had a good first US.  And I got a Pap Smear--the next day I had red bleeding.  Luckily, two US later, baby was still there.  I did need to go on bed rest a little bit during that time in the first trimester.  Good NT Scan in January, good big ultrasound in March---and baby came early close to 31 weeks on 5/26 at 12:19am--it was an allnighter--with baby being taken immediatelly to the NICU--and 35 days later, he came home.  

Take care of yourself right now.  I would respond "Maybe".  And if anyone asks, just say that you are having some issues with health, and it is better for you wait to see if you are able to come to the baby shower. Even if everything goes well, you may be dealing with more nausea--some women get more nausea than others.  

 It is over a month away.  So I really hope that your 1st trimester goes well for you.  It was fun being pregnant around Thanksgiving and Christmas (minus the red bleeding and bed rest--even I had to decline a birthday party due to bed rest).  And I concealed a lot of the pregnancy with a black maternity coat from Motherhood Maternity since it was chilly outside.   And it was fun being part of the July birth group--pregnant women in bikinis (not exactly me, but it was funny) and "Sparklers" July 4th holiday.  

elizabeth&james

My EDD was last weekend and I cried off and on for two days - day of and day after. Also, a month ago, I skipped a co-worker shower (2 pg coworkers w/ EDDs w/in one month of me on either side- no thank you. I mean, that would have been *my* shower, too. WAY too much to handle).

It has nothing to do with being pg again now. For me it was a reminder of how things could have been and that was way too painful and too much to put myself thru.

goalieamy24

I hosted my best friend's shower in August (before I knew I was pregnant again).  Our pregnancies were only about 4 weeks apart, so I dreaded having to go, letting alone hosting the event. But it turns out it went great.  I was able to block out any negative and be completely happy for her.  It may have been easier in some ways because I was hosting, so I was up doing stuff throughout the evening.  

MCH77

Thanks girls.  She is a friend from work, so I think I am going to see who else is going before I decide. 

Babyshowers just bring up so many thoughts.

Ernie52408

Don't force yourself if you don't feel comfortable. We went to a couple's baby shower yesterday. The mom was 6 weeks ahead of what I should have been. I didn't expect it to be that hard on me. I feigned m/s and left as soon as we could politely go.