Blended Families

physical custody question

Ok so my husbands ex has physical custody of SD.  DH just found out BM took SD out of school a couple weeks ago and is now home schooling SD.  I was wondering if she can make those types of decisions without talking with DH.  I understand that I have absolutely no say in any decisions that DH and BM make about SD.  I just want to know if BM can make these types of decisions without consulting with DH.  I am clueless on the legal aspects of custody.  Both DH and myself do not feel like this was the best decision for SD but is there anything DH can do about the situation? 

Re: physical custody question

  • Do you have a court order? 

    Do they have joint legal custody?

    The answer will totally depend on what is written in your CO?

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  • Physical custody and legal custody are separate.  Does your DH have joint legal (most common)?  If he does, he has the right to have input in the decision making.  Consult your attorney.
    Stay at home mom to a house of boys: two amazing stepsons, 12 and 9, and our 4 year old.
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  • As long as your DH has joint legal custody (physical custidy does not matter for health, education decisions) she cannot do that without agreement.

     

    But she alreday did it!

    You need to contact a lawyer if DH is not cool with home schooling.

  • image Phantomgirl:

    Do you have a court order? 

    Do they have joint legal custody?

    The answer will totally depend on what is written in your CO?

    this exactly.

    ours for DD states that all of these things have to be attempted as a decision mutually (though that doesn't seem to matter since he wants no involvement(sp), but if a decision can not be reashed mutually since I have physical custody, final decision is mine. 

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  • How is your communication with BM - kind of  dumb question considering there's been no communication on this issue - but is she truthful with DH?  Can you find out why they've made the change to homeschooling?  What plans she has for getting her involved with other homeschooled kids to participate in sports, etc?  Can she and DH talk through her decision process?

    Stay at home mom to a house of boys: two amazing stepsons, 12 and 9, and our 4 year old.
  • Check the current custody order. Ours states that school enrollment, religious organizations, extra curricular activities, etc. can not be enrolled or withdrawn from without notification within a certain time frame...prior to the change.

     

    Good luck! 

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  • Just curious how old is SD and why did she take her out?  Has DH talked to BM to find out why?  I am pretty anti home-schooling but I would want to know why before I freaked out, to me the only reason is that the school is really failing or that she is being bullied but that is my personal feelings and would want to hear it from BM.
    Jen - Mom to two December 12 babies Nathaniel 12/12/06 and Addison 12/12/08
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