Anyone have mixed feelings about a surprise #2?

egankn

I am not pg but I am testing soon and feel it might be positive.

 While we would love another baby things are not great in my professional life. I am losing my job in 11 months and I had to borrow sick leave for my DD's birth (and bedrest) so that won't be paid back until next September as well. So I would have to take maternity leave completely unpaid and I'd have no job soon after (if I didn't find one before then).

I know things could be worse and after the initial shock and replanning of things we'd be excited and happy.

 

alybookgirl

I say I'd be happy if we got pg by surprise, but I'm not completely sure. I am finally in good shape again and it is so easy taking care of 1 LO. I kinda like things the way that they are now.

emiliemadison

I dont think anyone could blame you for not jumping with joy at the idea of being pregnant in your situation.

But what makes you think you're pregnant if you're not even late yet? You're using BC, right?

pdljump21

We sure did.  But ours was a surprise #3.  And our kids were 6 & 7 already, so a big age difference.  But I am so happy that she came along.  I feel that she came along to help me with my depression actually.  She is a blessing, and such a great baby. 

I wish you luck in the job hunting, and congrats if you are pregnant. 

pam1005

I'm in that spot now.  We were totally not trying, but here we are pregnant.  I was in the process of interviewing to go back to work full time, so we could pay off some debt and save money for a larger car.  Well, we blew that plan as soon as we found out.  I am no longer going back to work (cost of two in daycare is not worth it) and we are finally used to the idea.  I am a little nervous, for I don't think I am ready for another LO, but we are excited.

mrs.jimbob squarepants

I am in the same boat. Would love another one but maybe not the best time right now. My daycare provider's daughter is having a baby in May so she wouldn't be able to watch another baby. That means I'd have to find new daycare and that was a pain the first time around. But I guess we'd make do if it happened. I have a feeling I will get a BFP when I test too b/c I have had some weird things going on with my taste buds and energy levels lately. Good luck to you either way!

egankn

emiliemadison:

I dont think anyone could blame you for not jumping with joy at the idea of being pregnant in your situation.

But what makes you think you're pregnant if you're not even late yet? You're using BC, right?

I'm having about 5 different symptoms that I had when pg with #1 and we use the pull & pray method, so no BC for me...yes, we're dumb but BCP give me huge migraines and I've tried everything...

ladysingstheblues

Do condoms give you migraines?

Good luck; I hope things work out for you.

DoubleDiamond

ladysingstheblues:

Do condoms give you migraines?

Good luck; I hope things work out for you.

You stole the words from my fingertips.

egankn

ladysingstheblues:

Do condoms give you migraines?

Good luck; I hope things work out for you.

Nope, just don't like them. We knew the chances.

After we are done with kids, DH will be getting snipped.

PinkGrapefuit

Why wait to get fired? Why not start looking for a new job now? If they want their money back, give it to them.... from your new paycheck.

egankn

PinkGrapefuit:

Why wait to get fired? Why not start looking for a new job now? If they want their money back, give it to them.... from your new paycheck.

I'm looking now, my company is moving to another state so we're all losing our jobs and that's over 500 people looking right now...

linz/scott

I am practically in the same boat right now. I'm in the waiting period. Right now I'm a substitute teacher, and hoping to get a teaching job next fall, but that plan will be pushed aside if I get a BFP. We were going to start trying next summer, so I didn't want to go back on BCP right now. We used the pull out method, (DH is ALWAYS right......to him its effective.) We have condoms, but he never wants to use them. If I get a BFN, we will start using them whether he likes it or not. But either way, we'll be happy.. things happen for a reason :-)

CalinsBride

Mixed feelings? No.

Bitter and horrified feelings? Yes.

And I'd be extremely angry with both the makers of the IUD AND the condom. We can not swing two right now. CAN NOT. Well, I guess I'd just have to look for a job ASAP. I'd have to stop looking in my field and just look anywhere at all, including restaurants, the mall, etc. So that would suck. But the plus side would be that I'd only have to work there for 600 hours (roughly 3 months full time) and then I'd qualify for paid maternity leave. So assuming I found a job in time, I guess it wouldn't be too bad. Then I'd be excited. But not.

Because I need to get out of this apartment. We need to buy another car. And we want DS to be in school before we have our second. And I want to be financially able to do all the things with #2 that I didn't get to with DS. Like maternity photos, a last vacation as a family of three, 3D US, etc, etc. I'm pretty good at rolling with the punches, though, and making the best of things, so I know I'd come around. But I really hope this next pregnancy will be on my terms, because the first definitely wasn't. I want the excitement of TTC and actually being READY for a baby.

CalinsBride

ladysingstheblues:

Do condoms give you migraines?

Good luck; I hope things work out for you.

Not to flame you, but you do know there are non-hormonal IUDs, right? And condoms actually make the sex last longer, so there's a perk right there. . .

ETA: BTW, my DS was conceived on the pull-out method. Last time we'll try that shiz.

emiliemadison

egankn:

ladysingstheblues:

Do condoms give you migraines?

Good luck; I hope things work out for you.

Nope, just don't like them. We knew the chances.

After we are done with kids, DH will be getting snipped.

Sigh. Ok, so if you're pregnant it wouldnt really be a "surprise" or "unplanned". You willingly had sex without protection during a financially tumultuous time when you knew getting pregnant would be a bad idea. I just dont understand why people do that, and then play it off like it was some accident and now they have to come to terms with it.

CalinsBride

emiliemadison:

egankn:

ladysingstheblues:

Do condoms give you migraines?

Good luck; I hope things work out for you.

Nope, just don't like them. We knew the chances.

After we are done with kids, DH will be getting snipped.

Sigh. Ok, so if you're pregnant it wouldnt really be a "surprise" or "unplanned". You willingly had sex without protection during a financially tumultuous time when you knew getting pregnant would be a bad idea. I just dont understand why people do that, and then play it off like it was some accident and now they have to come to terms with it.

Aw, but DH and I were drunk, out of condoms, and caught up in the moment. It was definitely unplanned. Stupid, yes, but we got something so beautiful out of it

linz/scott

emiliemadison:

egankn:

ladysingstheblues:

Do condoms give you migraines?

Good luck; I hope things work out for you.

Nope, just don't like them. We knew the chances.

After we are done with kids, DH will be getting snipped.

Sigh. Ok, so if you're pregnant it wouldnt really be a "surprise" or "unplanned". You willingly had sex without protection during a financially tumultuous time when you knew getting pregnant would be a bad idea. I just dont understand why people do that, and then play it off like it was some accident and now they have to come to terms with it.

In my DH's world, fiddling with a condom gets him out of the mood. But you are definitely right. Should just not do it if not going to wear a condom.

sunnyday016

CalinsBride:

ladysingstheblues:

Do condoms give you migraines?

Good luck; I hope things work out for you.

Not to flame you, but you do know there are non-hormonal IUDs, right? And condoms actually make the sex last longer, so there's a perk right there. . .

ETA: BTW, my DS was conceived on the pull-out method. Last time we'll try that shiz.

Yeah, DD was also conceived with the pull and pray "method". We don't do that anymore! 

linz/scott

CalinsBride:

emiliemadison:

egankn:

ladysingstheblues:

Do condoms give you migraines?

Good luck; I hope things work out for you.

Nope, just don't like them. We knew the chances.

After we are done with kids, DH will be getting snipped.

Sigh. Ok, so if you're pregnant it wouldnt really be a "surprise" or "unplanned". You willingly had sex without protection during a financially tumultuous time when you knew getting pregnant would be a bad idea. I just dont understand why people do that, and then play it off like it was some accident and now they have to come to terms with it.

Aw, but DH and I were drunk, out of condoms, and caught up in the moment. It was definitely unplanned. Stupid, yes, but we got something so beautiful out of it

I am right with you. It happens :-) Good luck to you! I hope you're happy with your result either way :-)

Kmills678

I was laid off when i was 5 months pregnant it sucks but at least you can plan ahead for the finacial end and stress I wish i had that oppertunity. good luck!