Why don't people RSVP to kid parties?

JillAly

Brady's 3rd birthday party is tomorrow. 

I paid for 12 kids (gymboree- they have a set amount per party and you pay extra if more show up).  I had exactly 12.  I was thrilled.  Then 2 cancelled - fine- it happens- they had good reasons (1 has poison ivy!). 

But 6 kids (their parents) never even RSVP'd.  I have no idea if they are coming or not.  It makes a huge difference in cost, in the amount of food and supplies I bring and the favors.  It's easy to say to assume they aren't coming but in the back of my head, I see a kid in tears because they don't have a favor bag. 

2 of the moms I know fairly well from daycare and would ask directly but I am on maternity leave so my dh is picking up/dropping off our son until I go back to work so I don't see them.  4 moms I don't know at all.  I don't have any of their numbers so I can't even call.  It's kids from his daycare so I put the invites in their cubbies (so can't claim lost in the mail either).

It isn't the end of the world.  It's just rude.  Didn't we all go through RSVP hell when we got married?  You'd think after we all dealt with this issue in our weddings (I assume everyone had SOMEONE who didn't RSVP) that moms would be better at RSVP'ing. 

Anyone else go through this too?

 

shellybird101

if your that concerned about the number why not just call the people to see who's coming or not.  I remember having to do this with my wedding... at least it was only 5 or so couples and not 100+. GL and have fun!!!

soontobecapek

Yes!!! Aiden's party is Sunday, I know it isn't a huge deal, but it would be nice to know for sure!

Pesky

Yes.  A few days before RSVPs were due, I issued a reminder to those I hadn't heard from.  Afterwards, I pretty much left daily notes.  There was still, after all that, one family who never got back to me and I just assumed she wasn't coming (she didn't).  The others sheepishly got back to me after a bit but like you, I needed numbers for food and gift bags.  But it was some major hounding.  A friend told me she got WAY better RSVP response rate with evite and I think I will do that in the future and just go to the trouble to get the email addresses of the parents in advance.

roseroseroseroserose

Annoying! Since my wedding, I have pledged to always RSVP!

punkfiction_v.3

bc people are rude.

roseroseroseroserose

punkfiction_v.3:

bc people are rude.

Ding ding ding!!!!

spunkielexis196

I agree it is rude and I have been on both sides of it.  My wedding it really annoyed me, and I had people show up who didn't RSVP, but it all worked out.

 

I was very hurt when no one RSVPed to my son's birthday party except my SIL, but she said, I can't come, but her son/daughter/DH might come.  How do you plan around I might come.  I was very hurt when my brother and his family verbally said they would be there and didn't bother to show or call.

I can say I forgot to RSVP to a birthday party DS was invited to.  It was a little girl in his classroom, I didn't even know which little girl it was, DS had only been in the room 1 week.  We got busy and the next thing I knew the date to RSVP had passed as well as the party.  I felt bad, but it is hard though at times being invited to a birthday party for a child that you cannot even identify. 

I know the mom was trying to be nice and invite all the kids in the room, but the kids are 2, and probably wouldn't even notice if they weren't invited, but I still have no excuse.

Temp159135562506975

i have 2 kid parties to RSVP to that i haven't yet - they are in a couple weeks.... the parents only put phone numbers on the invite to RSVP to - not an email - which drives me fvcking nuts b/c the few times I think about calling i have to worry "is it dinner time? is it too late? etc".... email is SO much easier- i don't know why people don't put that on invites - i RSVP to people RIGHT away when i have their email.

but all in all - people are aholes and it happens.

ceecee31

DD's party was last Sunday and I felt the same way!  Like, why won't people just say "Yes, we'll be there" or "No, we won't be there".  It's not like they'll be hurting our feelings if they can't make it.  Especially when children are involved...I made 24 treat bags and still have about 8-10 left.  And that's only because I gave some to the adults so they wouldn't go to waste.  

EnceeKatz

I don't understand it either.  It's plain rude.

LaLaSweets

i know! i can't stand it. I gave people a month for DD's party at the zoo. I'm so glad that i added 2 extra seats because her friend from class came and her sister as well lol

JOEBunny

I only invite people I know, not DD's whole class (just the 2 or 3 kids she really loves and has had playdates with).  This avoids the problem.  I ask the class to a different party one time and 3 out of 8 of the women never RSVP'd.  I assumed they were not coming and they didn't.  Honestly, I hate this whole class Birthday.  DD has 16 kids in her class.  They celebrate birthdays at school, that is enough. 

septemberdreams

I also hate b-day invites w/o e-mail.  e-mail is so much more convenient b/c I don't have to worry about the appropriate time to call.  As a working mom, there aren't a lot of appropriate times to call during the week from home-it's either dinner time, time with DS or after bedtime and as I don't appreciate anyone calling our house, I won't call anyone else's house.