How hard is it for a father to get full custody??

knmommy

My brother is filing for divorced, he is going for custody and the house.  My SIL has already told him if he leaves her she couldn't take care of the kids.  She spends absolutley no time with the kids and does whatever she can to get out of taking care of them.  My guess is she'll fight him out of spite. 

It seems like everyone I know is getting divorced lately.

mrslucid

If he can prove that she is an unfit mother then he should have a chance.  My DH has full custody of his son from a previous marriage.  BM was abusive to him when he was a baby and was not mentally fit to take care of him.

J&A2008

Difficult.  BM had years of documented drug addiction, and she still thought she could win custody.

sprky79

If he lives in the same state you do, it is not impossible.  I've seen it done.  He'll have a lot of work to do though.

luckyangel

If he starts off right away going for custody, he doesn't have to prove her unfit, just prove that him having custody is a safer, healthier, and more nurturing environment for them.  It's much harder to get custody after the fact.  My suggestion is that he file a petition for temporary custody of them, that would give him custody during the divorce proceedings and that will give him a big benefit in a custody fight.  

sweetie0228

I would *think* given that they are just divorcing and jsut starting custody he wouldn't have to prove her unfit he would have to prove he was the main caretaker for the children and it would be less disruptive and beneficial for the children to remain with him and give her visitation.

The courts usually side with the least disruption to children.

Banana44

My BIL just got custody of his 2 - but severe parental alienation was involved.  It took over 6 psychologists and several years to win the custody case.

I think your brother has a good shot if he starts documenting issues immediately, stays on top of his custidy time now (don't miss any time) and goes for custody from the beginning.  I agree with PP that it is probably easier to get custody from the get go.

Good luck to your brother!

 

mckelvykr

My dad was awarded custody of all three of us kids. My mom was not a drug user or a low life. My DH was told by his lawyer he had a great chance of winning full custody, but my DH didn't pursue that. The BM is not a drug user or a low life. Both of these cases were in Texas. HTH!

flippy1234

My DH has full custody of his two girls

VAGrrrl

My DH has had full custody of SS since the boy was 6. BM is an addict and had kidnapped SS and it took a private investigator and 4 months to find him 3000 miles away. When she came back to live in the area (this was WA state), she overdosed and I think it was at that time that she was deemed unfit. If this had happened in the state we are in now, I don't know that he would have gotten custody (as it stands, she still has no legal custody of the boy).

BrandyD06

depending what state he lives in will help his chances. tell him also to leave the house and take his son with him when he does thats how my H custody of his daughter.

knmommy

there is hope!!!  He actually lives a few blocks from me and taking the kids out of the home (6 yo and 2yo twins) would be too disruptive.  He is going for full custody and the house.  He was told by the lawyer not to leave his home.  We will see!  Thanks everyone.

luckyangel

knmommy:

there is hope!!!  He actually lives a few blocks from me and taking the kids out of the home (6 yo and 2yo twins) would be too disruptive.  He is going for full custody and the house.  He was told by the lawyer not to leave his home.  We will see!  Thanks everyone.

I was just going to say, tell him NOT to leave the house.  That's a mistake most guys make.  Good luck!   

FML8608

He needs to "document, document, document"!!!