Potty Training
When you "take a break" from PTing...
do you put DC back in diapers? Or proceed to clean up after lots of accidents? DD is being downright defiant right now about going to the bathroom and I really don't think I should be forcing her and/or getting upset about it, but I don't think I'm supposed to put her back in diapers...thoughts? TIA!
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Re: When you "take a break" from PTing...
I was told that taking a break is a no-no. It teaches them that if they have accidents you will eventually give up and put a diaper on. Why would they ever become potty trained if they know they have another option.
I'd stick with it and keep cleaning up her messes. You had to have seen some readiness signs to start PTing. DD willl get it eventually.
I just switched her to pull-ups all day. So far she is doing really good with it and even better than she did with panties. She's been keeping them dry for most of the morning and then in the afternoon, it will try to get harder to get her to sit on the potty. She was having a fit when I would ask her to go and she really didn't care when she was having an accident. She's still young and I feel like eventually she'll get it. I don't like the 3-day method (it seems too pushy to me) I just don't want to force her.
First would you describe her as a "strong willed" child? My BFF has a 3 year old that was like this. She turned 3 at the end of April and I was watching her over the summer for my BFF. We were both so frustrated with her, because she could hold it and knew what to do, she just didn't want to because we were asking her or wanting her to go on the potty. So my BFF decided to take a new approach with her. One evening she got out a really big garbage bag (like lawn and leaf bag) asked her daughter to come with her to the bathroom. Where she proceeded to throw the princess potty into the garbage bag, then they went into her bedroom and got all of her character panties out of the drawers and my BFF threw those into the garbage bag as well. Her daughter said "Mommy what are you doing with my potty and panties?" She told her since you don't want to go on the potty like a big girl I am throwing this all away because you are going back into diapers. She then walked out of the bedroom and out into the garage and put the bag away where her daughter couldn't see it, and told her she had thrown them away.
She then put her in pull ups full time, day and night. I never asked her if she needed to use the potty during the day when she was with me and my BFF never asked her at home. Her daughter often would say to us, "I peed in my diaper, I guess I am a bad girl." She said this just to see how we would react. Both of us just said, "Ok A, go get a new pull up to put on and throw the wet one in the garbage." Just as casual about it as we could be.
After about a week of this, she came home one day and told her Mom, she wanted to use the big potty and throw her changing pad away because she was a big girl and didn't need diapers anymore and she wanted to wear panties to my house from now on. From that day on she has not been in a pull up since (except overnight because she still pees overnight). Because she was so strong willed, she just needed to decide she wanted to do it and that was that. It worked because we stopped giving her so much attention for not going on the potty and that she should since she was a big girl.
But again, she is just that kind of kid. If you tell her the grass is green, she will tell you it is red. She argues about.every.little.thing. It was the most tiring 9 weeks I ever spent watching that girl and I also had her 5 year old sister and my twin 2 year olds and they were nothing compared to taking care of her. She is a wonderful little girl, but sooooo strong willed.
If this sounds a little like your little girl, I would not put her in diapers, I would go to pull ups because she can then get them off easily if she wants to go. But I would back off, put all the potty training stuff away, the potty if you use one and the panties. Get them out of her drawers and let her see you doing it. And then don't give her the attention she wants for not going. I bet within a couple of weeks she will realize she isn't getting your attention anymore and will decide to start going on the potty because she wants to be a big girl.
I agree going back to pull ups sounds like a regression, and I think it is for a 2-3 year old. But for a strong willed 3 year who understands they do have control over when and how they go potty, putting them back in pull ups/diapers and not giving then the fight they want, will often change their perspective.