Grandmother to be Nesting? But I'm having the baby!
My mother -the grandmother to be- has refurnished and redecorated a room in her house to be a nursery. While I'm grateful that she has interest in helping to care for my unborn child, her excessive nesting seems to rub me the wrong way.
I think she should be concerned with helping me get my child's room in my home ready but instead she's out shopping to outfit a nursery at her house. She even had her friends come over to help her repaint her guest room. When I show her something that I received from a shower or purchased she usually follows up with a statement like "Oh, I need that for my house".
When I go back to work I have arranged for daycare on M, W, & F. And, I told my mother she can care for the baby on Tues & Thurs AT MY HOUSE - not hers - so I don't see why she even needs a full fledged nursery at her house.
I'm wondering if I just need to adjust my attitude or let her know this bothers me.???
Re: Grandmother to be Nesting? But I'm having the baby!
My MIL did the same thing while I was pregnant with DD. I actually remember going to her house to feed her cats while she was out of town and finding baby toys, clothes, etc all laid out in the guest room. I had a total crying fit over it b/c at the time we hadn't even started buying things for our own nursery! So I understand how you're feeling - you don't want to seem ungrateful, but at the same time, it's YOUR baby not hers!
It took a while for me to come around to the idea, but now that DD is older it is actually really nice to have another set of everything at MIL's house. I can go over there and never worry about packing a diaper bag or forgetting something at my place.
This.
Granted my mom lives 2000 miles away so her coming to help me out wasn't exactly an option beforehand with my first - but she set up a room with a crib & changing area and it's been great for when we're there visiting. Makes traveling and staying away from home (for any length of time) with a little one that much easier - whether it be 2000 miles or 20 minutes down the road.
Mine (MIL) is having a nursery, all set with a crib, and is also going as far as to buying a brand new SUV, because her 4-door car is not big enough for baby. ?? (Did I mention she lives half a block away, and will not be primary baby-sitter - my mother will be - since my mother is retired and MIL works full-time?)
It bothers me a little, BUT, I'm just kinda ignoring these feelings cuz she is excited, plus it is her that is wasting the money and unfortunately will be disappointed when baby never sleeps there, and never really rides in her brand new SUV. What can you do.