Breaking the news to my family...good and bad

Newts Mommy

Well today was the big day, I told my family! I bought a card for my grandparents and a card for my mom.  My mom didn't even have to open the card all the way, as soon as she saw the "grandparent" part she was like really??? I had my DH give my grandma her card, she was sitting outside and I had my mom come with me to the window to watch my grandma's expression.  Well as soon as my mom and I start staring out the window at my grandma everyone who was inside started looking outside, but only my mom and I knew what was getting ready to happen.  My grandma opened the card and I signed it, love DH, Me, SD, and the newt aka our little miracle. My grandma looked at DH and said what's the newt? My husband said your unborn great grandchild, and my grandma said she's pregnant? It was so funny to see everyone figure it out one by one, especially my aunt.  My uncle came flying in the house and hugged me like he would never hug me again, lol.  Everyone was really excited, I think my mom was about to pee herself because she was so happy.  My aunt almost started crying and then had me crying.

The only downfall to the day? My grandfather's response when I told him I was pregnant..."Congrats...I guess. If that's what you want." I said, "Well I guess it's a little too late now, and yes we really want this." His response? "Well, technically it's not too late." I went from to in like 3 seconds. I really wanted to look at him and tell him to shut the fuvk up and we were happy so shut your trap! I mean really? REALLY??? How could you say such a thing when a person is obviously happy? And how, HOW, could you suggest such a thing when you were just told that you are going to be a GREAT-GRANDFATHER...shouldn't you be happy? Almost totally brought my day down, but I decided not to let it bother me or ruin my day...UNTIL....we were getting ready to leave and my uncle congratulates DH and I again and my grandfather says, congrats on what? REALLY!?!?!? I just don't get it, I tried to brush it off all day but I'm doing my homework and I'm stressed and upset because my homework is p*ssing me off and so this is really starting to get to me.  At least my mommy is happy right?

I hope you ladies are having a better day/evening!

p1nklemonade

not to sound offensive at all to the elderly, but sometimes as we age we lose our filters for what should and shouldn't be said. every now and then, but a bit more frequently recently, my grandma, who is in her eighties, comes out with a doozy.  not to say you shouldn't be pissed, because i would too, but just wanted to provide some perspective.  congratulations!

Newts Mommy

I know...he's always been a kind of a jerk, I just chalked it up to him no longer having a filter or just not giving a hoot.  Thanks for the congrats and the perspective!

Mrs S 08

I can understand you being upset, but I have to ask, does your grandfather have alzheimers? Even the early stages have people saying/thinking weird things. My grandpa has it and when my mom told him I was pregnant and she was going to be a grandmother, and him a great-grandfather, he couldn't remember I had gotten married (almost 2 yrs ago) and thought I was "pregnant out of wedlock." At first he was worried, and wasn't too happy, until my mom explained to him that I was indeed married, and this was a planned pregnancy. The next time I saw him he didn't even remember.

I of course don't know if that is just how your grandfather is, but if that is not normally how he might have been or acted in the situation I wouldn't get too offended by it.

pinkflipflops44

Just let it go.  He is old and probably didn't remember and I am sure he actually is happy for you but some people don't know how to verbally express themselves and they say awkward things when they are surprised.

Newts Mommy

Unfortunately he doesn't have a medical condition I can blame it on...I know that sounds bad but if it were something medical I could swallow it a lot better.  He just has no consideration for other people's feelings or emotions, I mean he has made my aunt cry on more than one occasion because he constantly comments on her weight. My aunt is really self concious about it and even though my grandma has spoken  to him several times about it he just doesn't seem to care.  I didn't expect him to jump for joy or scream or cry or throw me a party but I would love it if he would just for once think about someone other than himself.  I didn't expect an elaborate response but I definitely didn't expect the response he gave me either.  I guess I'm just being too sensitive about it and I should just chalk it up to him being him.

 That's really sad to hear about your grandfather, alzheimers is a terrible disease and it has taken a lot of family members that I love.  I hope that you get to spend as much time as possible with your grandfather.  Thanks for the advice.

Kat1sat

Mrs S 08:

I can understand you being upset, but I have to ask, does your grandfather have alzheimers? Even the early stages have people saying/thinking weird things. My grandpa has it and when my mom told him I was pregnant and she was going to be a grandmother, and him a great-grandfather, he couldn't remember I had gotten married (almost 2 yrs ago) and thought I was "pregnant out of wedlock." At first he was worried, and wasn't too happy, until my mom explained to him that I was indeed married, and this was a planned pregnancy. The next time I saw him he didn't even remember.

I of course don't know if that is just how your grandfather is, but if that is not normally how he might have been or acted in the situation I wouldn't get too offended by it.

 

I have to go with this one also my great-grandma is a lot this way. She is short with all of us. Grand maw and mom said she was just awfully ugly to your sister when she and hubby were expecting there first child. She did have dementia. Any way you have a good evening just don't let it put a damper on the excitment you are experiencing. This is your time of joy. Congrats!