Trying to stay away from the MC/PG loss board...

acast187

After my MC in February the MC/PG loss board was my home. Everyday for months I would post and comment on the board. Now after we decided to take this next step and try to start TTC soon and learn more about TTCAL I havent been getting on the MC/PG loss board I hate to see all the new post and reading all the stories about women lossing thier children! I just want to cry! I feel like am at the point were I can stand more on my own with out leaning on that board... Has anyone else felt this way or is feeling this way? Please tell me am not a monster for wanting to stay away from that board!

kmb585

I feel the same way.  Even though I have not been offcially cleared for TTC again, I feel a little more positive moving forward by being over here.  Allthough that board was a tremendous sense of support for a few days

rock-elle

IMO, I think its natural and not uncommon.  I think it is habit to *surround* yourself with whom you identify most with.  When I left mc/pl board for here my posting over there slowed down a bit to now almost never only because they may not want to see my mc info in my siggy or a ovulation ticker I have especially if their losses are really new. 

When aweful people post things over there that are inappropriate most of us head over there in an instant to "protect" them because a lot of us started there and all of us know the pain these women are in.  Now I just identify with TTCAL so much more, so here is where I am.

jamilynn9

I do.  I wouldn't allow myself to come to TTTAL until I was ready.  Now I won't go back...or move forward until I'm pg.

spincat9

I made a gradual transition.  I was on both boards for maybe a month (largely because I knew a lot of people on mc/pl and felt comfortable there).  As I got to know people on TTCAL I spent less and less time on mc/pl.  Plus it did make me really sad to dig up the raw feelings when I was trying to move on to TTC.

jerriesgirl

I understand how you feel.  I go back to post the weekly Late Loss/Stillborn/Infant Loss Check-in, but other than that I will graze over the page one in awhile to make sure no one has paged me over.  Most of the ladies that were active over there when I was there for support are now over here.  I had to stop reading the posts for awhile because I would sit at my desk and cry all day.  It became overwhelming leading up to my EDD.

Sunflower730

I still post there from time to time to give the girls some support. I think they need to see someone who been there, had it happen and 5 + months later still dealing with sadness and that there is hope getting up each day.

CashewsMommy

jerriesgirl:

I understand how you feel.  I go back to post the weekly Late Loss/Stillborn/Infant Loss Check-in, but other than that I will graze over the page one in awhile to make sure no one has paged me over.  Most of the ladies that were active over there when I was there for support are now over here.  I had to stop reading the posts for awhile because I would sit at my desk and cry all day.  It became overwhelming leading up to my EDD.

I totally forgot about the check-in. I haven't been over there in a long time. I  do feel bad, because i know how good it felt to have someone go through what I did and are "better" after awhile. But i'm just in a totally different place in my healing. It's more selfish for me, since i am in a different place with my healing i think it would hurt me to go back now and then and comment.

damabo80

I felt the same way. I didn't think I'd ever want to leave the MC/PGL board, but TTCAL has become my new home. I think it helped when all the girls who went through a loss at about the same time (April-ish) came over here, since I had gotten to know them on MC/PGL.

However, I do still respond to posts occasionally (usually the ones about NTDs, terminating for medical reasons, and IF, since these are topics I know).

I hope you enjoy your stay on this board!!

Gummybear

I reply once in awhile over there, esp. to girls who have losses like mine. But overall, I try to stay here. I needed to move to a move uplifting place after a few weeks, and posting here was so much better for me, mentally. The mc/pl board is such a painful place, and it serves it purpose well, but I think it can bring out a lot of anxiety for me personally, because all the introductions are bad, obviously, and at this point, I need to think positively.

The journey is such an interesting one, from there to here. I remember thinking I could never be whole again after everything happened, that I would never heal or smile again. I've come a long way, baby.

stillbaking

No, you're not a monster. I feel the same way - I still go over there occasionally, but I find it's not good for me emotionally to be there all the time anymore. It's so hard seeing all the new miscarriages, and gives me anxiety about TTC again...

itsmegin

I feel so obligated to post, or at least reply there, like I need to help the women just coming onto the board, but it is upsetting and hard.

I try to make myself answer a few posts everyday but it is getting harder and harder. I try to think that I can make some good come out of my experience by using it to help other people with some information, but sometimes it is too much to read all the posts. I usually don't respond to the general posts that are just looking for sympathy but only the ones where they are asking a specific question I can answer.

millejj1

rock-elle:

IMO, I think its natural and not uncommon.  I think it is habit to *surround* yourself with whom you identify most with.  When I left mc/pl board for here my posting over there slowed down a bit to now almost never only because they may not want to see my mc info in my siggy or a ovulation ticker I have especially if their losses are really new. 

When aweful people post things over there that are inappropriate most of us head over there in an instant to "protect" them because a lot of us started there and all of us know the pain these women are in.  Now I just identify with TTCAL so much more, so here is where I am.

I totally agree with this. I waited to come over to TTCAL until I was ready, and by then several of the ladies I was on the mc/pl board with were already here. It's like we "graduated" together and that helped.

I go back and check on those ladies once in awhile and will respond if something is particularly close to home, but I'm not there very frequently. 

la*bella*vita

Im just coming to this board now since we're in our 1st official TTCAL cycle! I think its a gradual step to heal to change boards. At least in my mind.

biddy53178

since i came to this board i havent been back to that one~