Working Moms
You want me to eat this food...
no thanks, i have my paci.
Options
another milestone missed...
so i work 8-430, which means i leave no later then 740, home by 450....
my dh works 2-10pm, so he is home until 130 which then my mom comes over until i get home.
the other week i get a phone call from my dh who says dd just rolled over....and i missed it, but he got the second time on video....
and now today i get an email when dh got to work saying, well, she finally figured out how to get from her stomach back to her back....and i missed that as well.
how do you get over missing all of these great things when you are at work....
You want me to eat this food...
no thanks, i have my paci.This discussion has been closed.
Re: another milestone missed...
My daycare doesn't really mention it when he does new stuff. For some reason milestones don't bother me that much. It's not like they won't do it again. I just try to focus on all the positives, like how much fun he is having at school with all his little buddies.
Honestly, it's never bothered me. When Andrew took his first steps our au pair (at the time) asked DH and me to come in to the family room when we got home from work. Then she stood Andrew up and he walked to us! That was an amazing moment and we all cried. I wasn't sad that she saw it before us. But I was glad she made a big deal out of showing us what he had learned.
The first time you see a milestone it will be a big deal. Just be glad your LO is hitting them. {hugs}
My twins are 5! My baby is 3!
DS#2 - Allergic to Cashew, Pistachio, Kiwi
DS#3 - Allergic to Milk, Egg, Peanut, Tree Nuts and Sesame
1) Your DH needs to stop telling you.
2) How do you know it was the first time? Couldn't LO have done it in their sleep, or at church nursery on Sunday and no one knew it was the first time?
3) Your DH needs to stop telling you.
I missed my LO's first rollover during the 10 minutes I ran out to sign a mortgage refi. He was with MIL. I was still on maternity leave.
You just can't dwell on it. It could have happened while you were going potty, not just while you were at work.
never bothered me. I find that those milestones usually span a week or two. All of the rolling over, crawling, talking....it wasn't just one a-ha moment. Each one took a while to happen; over a week or so. Who cares if you missed the first time? Sje will do it again, right? When you get home.
How do you even know if that was her first time? She could have done it by herself in her crib when you weren't looking. If you had been home, you could have been in the bathroom or in another room and missed it. Just b/c you were at work earning a living to buy her things and provide for her doesn't mean you missed squat.
I never let this kind of stuff bother me, honestly. I don't undesratnd the big deal. I actually literally rolled my eyes when I read the topic of your post.
Talk to your DH and your Mom and tell them you don't want them telling you about it anymore.
Because it was a first time when I saw it! Any other times didn't count as the first time that Mommy saw it, Mommy screamed, Mommy ran across the room, Mommy hugged him and told him how proud I was of DS.
Then, if my DH or grandma or grandpa missed it, I'd re-live it with them. It was awesome. I never felt that I missed out on any of his firsts!
That's why I've never understood this angst around milestones, to be honest.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
Don't dwell over it too much. Also put yourself in your DH's shoes. I'm sure there will be times she does stuff at night that will be a first with you and he will miss it.
My husband travels a lot and there will be many firsts he will miss. And as working mom, we all miss firsts. It is just whether or not we want to be told or see for ourselves.
If it bothers you that much, then have him not tell you.
You won't be around to see every first they ever have. Why do these matter so much more than those?
Our nanny will wait for us to tell her our DS did something and then she will either be surprised because it was the first time or she will agree that yes he is now "fill in the blank." That way in the moment we get the joy of seeing it happen and not know if it was the first time.
I'm an adoptive mom and my kids were 8 and 10 months old when they came home, Clearly, I missed a LOT of firsts. I can't even answer questions as to how old they were when they hit milestones.
If I really let it bother me, it would kill me. Just like it's killing you. You just have to accept your situation and enjoy watching your DH grow, just as you would if you were with her 24/7 for the rest of her life.
This exactly. LO has been walking at DC for weeks. I have yet to see it. In reality, the first time they reach these "milestones" is usually pure accident.
With DD, I was on maternity leave, and put her in her crib to stare at her mobile while I got dressed. I heard her fussing and turned on the video monitor... and realized I was staring at her back. That was her first major milestone, and I missed it. Even though I was technically a SAHM at the time!
At least when I'm working, I have a good excuse for missing things!
Mommy to DD1 (June 2007), DS (January 2010), DD2 (July 2012), and The Next One (EDD 3/31/2015)
IMO the first time I see it is the first time he does it.
Plus, who knows? She may be rolling all over her crib at night and no one sees it! So you really never know when her official"first time" is
This. Try to not let it bother you. I think you'll find that the more she does, the less it will bother you.
When I read the title of this post, I thought it was going to be written by a mother who was in distress because her baby was not making his/her milestones on time.
Count your blessings.
This, but honestly, I don't even remember the first time dd rolled over. You are also lucky to have a good schedule and short commute.
I didn't read all the other replies but I will tell you it's just as easy to miss a milestone if you're at home. I had the benefit of being home with both of my babies for 5 months of maternity leave. I totally missed #2 roll over because he did it when I turned my back to put some clothes away in his closet (he was on a blanket on the floor).
Most milestones are accomplished gradually. I still can't quite figure out when my DS took his real first steps - do we count the time that he took one step and fell, two steps and fell, three steps and fell or maybe the time that he walked from me to DH? It's hard to put an exact date on some of these things regardless of whether you're home or not. Don't stress about it - just try to be happy when you see your LO making progress, regardless of whether you see every gradual step or not.