First birthday party guest list

QueSrah

What do you think is the idea size for a baby's first birthday? 

DH's proposed guest list is about 30 adults and 15 kids, and includes people we haven't seen since last year.  My proposed guest list would exclude the friends we haven't seen in at least six months (that basically don't know DD) and the second cousins (over a dozen with kids that we see once or twice a year), so maybe 15 adults and 5 kids.  I think DH sees this as an excuse to gather together everyone we never get to see for a big party, while I see it as more of a way to gather together the people that really know the birthday girl.

We always disagree about parties.  Why did I think this one would be any different?

Hey Jellisy

For DDs first birthday party we went with your husband's model.  Your daughter won't remember the party, it really is for you and your husband.  Future years will be a different story, but for the 1st, I thought of it as a celebration that everyone could share in. 

DCtoLowcountry

Glad you posted this, since I'm representing your DH's side in my house (it's a party, more the merrier). I'm thinking of it as a party for our family with a side of smash cake. FWIW DS loves a crowd.

eeclem

This was a question that I kind of struggled with. On one hand, I would have loved to have a great big party with all of our friends and family to celebrate the year (and we have very big, local families so that would be an invite list of 60+ people). But, honestly - I don't have the energy to put together a party that big right now.

We decided to go with immediate family and close friends (mostly with kids). I actually bought the invitations first and based our guestlist on the number of invites (15). Everyone in attendance will be someone that C knows pretty well and I think that's perfect.

victoria1212

we had a very small guest list- mainly family and a few, close friends (but not all close friends). DD gets a little overwhelmed with lots of people so even though she won't remember the party- we wanted her to enjoy herself. she had a blast running around!

Mrs.Ram

I'm probably alone in my thinking on this, but we are only doing immediate family. I just don't feel like putting something big together, and want to save the big parties for when DD knows what's going on. I think she may also be overwhelmed if we do a big blowout. I've been to big 1st birthdays, and they are definitely fun, but are more for the parents.

bh2720

Mrs.Ram:

I'm probably alone in my thinking on this, but we are only doing immediate family. I just don't feel like putting something big together, and want to save the big parties for when DD knows what's going on. I think she may also be overwhelmed if we do a big blowout. I've been to big 1st birthdays, and they are definitely fun, but are more for the parents.

this. especially the bolded part. we only invited grandparents and close family. 

(you're not alone, Mrs. Ram!!! )

NowDNAtoo

We invited immediate family and only a couple close friends (one happens to have a son who is just over a month younger than DS).  Now for his second we invited the same exact people as first birthday plus a few kids from his playgroup, so that's where the guest list starts to grow.

mstavish79

We also just had a few close friends (with kids) and immediate family members.  Our relatives all live in New England so we had the grandparents fly in for the weekend and that was plenty to deal with since they all stayed with us.  This was also the weekend of the second big snow storm last year.  It was quite a weekend! 

tomandcourt

We leaned more toward your model, but that still ends up with about 30 adults and just 2-3 kids (all 1 or under so I don't count them). We invited all grandparents, local great-grandparents, my mom's immediate family (all local), and then our friends who have met J. We also courtesy invited people who are out of town, with the expectation that they wouldn't come (and none of them are, except DH's parents).

LindseyJW

i'd go with your husband's model. like PPs have said, the party is more for you than for your daughter, who will have no recollection of it at all.

we actually had several parties for our son:

- on his actual birthday, we had dinner wtih both sets of gparents and a small cake

- we had a party at his daycare wtih cake and party hats

- we had a party with the families that we did regular playdates wtih

- we had a "survival" party with mostly adults

while i would not recommend four parties (i was a stressed out mess), we did seem to cover all the groups of people in a unique event.