When I first read your post, I wasn't going to reply because you are such a trainwreck, but I can't help it. I can't NOT say anything.
When I was pregnant with that adorable kid in my sig, my water broke at 32 weeks. That adorable kid ended up in a NICU 2 hours away from me for a week. And then was transferred back to the hospital here and spent 5 weeks in that hospital. Do you know what my bill was for the ambulance rides to and from the NICU were? $3500 each trip. Do you know what my bill was for the one damn week in the NICU at the hospital 2 hours away? $50,000. Do you know how much my bill was for the 5 weeks she spent in the hospital here? Almost as much as the week in the NICU. And that doesn't include the bill for my c-section and one day that I spent in the hospital, which was nearly $10,000. Do you know how much of those I had to pay? $200. Because I had health insurance. Do you know how much financial trouble I would be in still, 5 years later, if I didn't have health insurance to pay for all that? A whole hell of a lot.
There was also 6 months of physical therapy she had to do, the oxygen she went home on and was on for a month and a half after she came home, the RSV vaccinations she had to have that winter. All of that got paid for somehow, and most of it WASN'T by me.
I had zero, ZERO warning that I was going to go into labor early. I had a perfect pregnancy, no complications, nothing.
I feel sorry for the helpless kid you are going to bring into this trainwreck of a life you are living. Get your head out of your a$$ and get insurance.