To tell or not to tell - that is the question!

jessicada76

I have read so many people on here that want to tell someone but don't want anyone to know.  My personal opinion was this.  We told at 4 weeks with Paige - everyone basically knew.  This time everyone knew by about 5 weeks.  I figure the more people I have that knows the more people I have praying for my pregnancy.  And if something were to happen - God forbid - then I would have that many people praying for our loss.  So it is a win win! :-)  Anyone else feel this way or is everyone on here hush hush until that first ultrasound?

currybird

I'm sort of with you on this, but not 100%.  We won't be telling everyone, but we do want our close family and friends (mainly the people in our Bible study) to know soon.  Extra prayers are always much appreciated.

mrs_b_2007

to that I say that I am happy things worked out for you.

I was once 5 weeks pregnant & told my family too. I thought I would have a baby in 9 months so I was OK with telling them. That didn't happen. It was very hard to deal with. The more people that knew, the harder it was to go through a day without someone bringing it up or saying "I'm sorry".

It's not fun. People like to protect themselves from the potential pain. To each their own. 

 

6fsn

I want my dearest friend and my family to support me in happy or sad news.  I don't need every 2nd and 3rd tier high school friend or chat at the mailbox neighber to know about it. 

We'll put out a facebook post around 13 weeks and the neighbors can find out as they notice. 

Dixiebell

i agree, but thats also means more people who are gonna express their apologies if something did happen. Im one of those people i can handle anything until someone asks me if im okay.... then here come the waterworks. :-) Me, myself (although i would appreciate the prayers) would prefer less people to know.

kickenb

We are telling family now.  Co-workers I won't be telling until closer to 12 weeks or depending on how soon I start showing. 

magdalina.h

we kept it hush hush only because we liked that little secret just between the two of us. 

jarobinson21

This is my first and I have been having trouble keeping my mouth shut. We told out immediate families and close friends. But MIL and my mom have been telling their siblings. But that part of both families live a good distance, and if anything happens, I won't have to tell them, and probably won't see them for while. 

shanatait2be

I can definitely understand that thinking. The more prayer, the better. With my first, we told as soon as we found out at 6 weeks. This time, we found out alot earlier b/c I had a prescheduled appt at my ObGyn. So, I want to wait a little while. Not for any reason in particulare, but just in case. More than anything, it just seems so early. I really don't "feel" pg yet, I guess I originally wanted to wait until around 8 weeks or so, but I am starting to rethink that. The more I think about it, the more I want to share the good news with at least our closest couple friends!  But, I agree, it would be nice to have support and prayers. However, I could see how having everyone know, could make it harder on a daily basis when you have to keep talking about it if something does happen.

S&D_2005

With DD, we told our families when I was 5 weeks along. With this one, we didn't really decide on when we should tell. Our good friend just went through a miscarriage, and my other friend had two, so we're just being cautious, I guess. I want to tell someone, but we'll have to both decide when the right time to tell is, I guess. Hopefully it won't be much longer because I suck at keeping secrets.

skio

I understand your thinking and am glad it has worked out for you!

However, I'm on the other side of the spectrum. We had our first u/s almost 2 weeks ago, and we're still not revealing it to the world. We have told my parents, DH's parents, SIL, DH's Aunt, and DH's grandparents. I told my best friend last week and DH's team at work (3 guys) know. That's it for now. The only ones who knew before 9 weeks were my parents.

Here's why. We're a private couple, me especially, and wanted to have this between us for a little while. I also hate being the center of attention and prefer to put off all the "omg how are you feeeeeeling" questions until later. Lastly, and this only became clear now that we've told those closest to us, if something does go wrong, neither of us want the sad looks and pity from people we barely know. I think that would just make it harder. Having immediate family and best friends there for support is one thing. That goes back to the privacy thing. So, it's under wraps from non-family for another 2-3 weeks. Just us.

azuremama

Well, my reasons are different, but I told my family and close friends pretty early on.  I can't imagine keeping it a secret from family, although I do understand that other people have their reasons. 

We just started telling neighbors the last week or two.  I won't tell work for another week or two.

I was suprised when two women at work recently told everyone right away (like 5 weeks).  I guess I just don't want everyone knowing my business.

irisey80

We haven't told many people yet.  Just DH's business partners, because DH can't keep a secret.  I'm a pretty private person and I just don't want people in my business yet.  I think we will tell MIL this weekend and my parents in a couple weeks (I want to tell them in person and I won't see them for awhile).  Work will probably find out ~12 weeks.

biblionerd

We'll be telling close family (siblings, parents, and grandparents) only at 7 weeks then I'll tell the rest of the world at 12 or so. Yes, I do want my parents support if something happens, and I would tell them and get it heaven forbid I need it. To me it would be easier to share a m/c after it happened. Not that there's anything magical about 7 weeks, but we at least want to see the hb first.

jashea1

I have only told my husband....figured he might want know....and my two best friends...one was there when i took the test....and the other said i looked kinda puffy in the middle (bloated) so i just confessed. I have miscarried before and hated to have to talk about it with everyone so i'm tryin to keep quiet this time until at least 12 weeks. I guess its kinda if they don't ask i won't tell but no big announcement from me.