Community› The Bump Message Boards› Infertility
Infertility
New Discussion

Wow... my boss announced that I was pregnant today... and I've never been... horrible IF moment

3citygirl3citygirl
in Infertility
So today my boss brought his 4 week old baby into work for us all to meet her.  I was standing in a circle with a bunch of coworkers (including my preggo BFF) when my boss held his baby up to me and told her I "had a baby in my belly" and so did my friend.  I couldn't speak cause i was shocked.  My friend corrected him that I am not pregnant.  I told him a couple months ago that I was doing ivf... I guess he figured i must be pregnant by now.  He didn't mean anything bad by it -- he just has no idea what the ins and outs of IVF are... but I've never heard those words since I've never been pregnant... so it floored me.  And my coworkers must've been confused or thinking I really am KU.  I held back the tears until I could sneak away but it was one of my worst moments on this whole IF journey.
PCOS, Hypothyroidism, a ton of IVF... finally it worked => a rough pregnancy => my sweet, sweet son born at 29 weeks 1 day Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
Report Reply to Post

Re: Wow... my boss announced that I was pregnant today... and I've never been... horrible IF moment

  • amethystgrrlamethystgrrl member
    Yeoch! That's awful, and I'm sure painful to hear... I'm really sorry you had to endure that.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • Loading the player...
  • etoyamaetoyama member
    I'm sorry :( people are so stupid.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • MrsRich0226MrsRich0226
    I'm so sorry...how awful!  I don't know if I could have held back the tears as long as you did!
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • psychmusetlspsychmusetls member
    Oh my gosh. There are no words. I am so sorry. ::::: big hugs ::::::
    S/PAIFW
    Tara & Dave - TTC since September 2006
    PCOS - dx 1999 (amenorrhea) | freakishly long fallopian tubes
    Hypoglycemic | thyroid issues | severely anemic
    Multiple Clomid cycles of 50, 100, 150 - absolutely no response
    Follistim 50/100 | Follistim 75/125 | Follistim 100/150 IUI - all BFNs
    Converted IVF - BFP - m/c | FET - BFN | IVF #2 = BFN
    IVF #3
    Report Reply
  • RyC2RyC2
    My boss did a similar thing to me but at least he made his assumption in private... I can only imagine having it done in a big group of coworkers... so sorry you were put through that.  Somehow events like that make not being pregnant sting a little more.  Hugs.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • SweetyPy17SweetyPy17 member
    Wow. Ppl are stupid. Want me to throat punch them? ;) I'm sorry hon. Big huge (((hugs)))
    Diagnosis - MIF - FUIF!
    #1 12R, 7M, 5F - 2- 3dt BFN - 1 totsicle became our DD.
    TTC#2 since 1/12
    IVF #2 - 10R, 6M, 5F - 1 5dt of a morula= BFN none to freeze.
    IVF #3 (blegh) Long Lupron Protocol
    ER 8/23 12R, 7M, 2F - 2 beautiful 3d 8/26
    +HPT 9/3 beta #1 9/10= 78.5 #2 9/12 = 136 #3 9/14 319 #4 9/17 890 #5 9/21 2119
    Little B is where he needs to be. HB 9/24. no HB 10/3. Missed m/c @ 8w. D&C 10/5 :(
    IVF #4 - Antagonist Protocol
    ER - 17R, 14M, 9F - 1 beautiful blast 12/13 (Our anniversary), 3 more FROZEN!! WOO HOO!
    +HPT 12/17 beta #1 12/27 = 1654 (um hells to the yeah), beta #2 12/31 = 6994, 1st u/s= 1/8 (fingers firmly crossed) = HB 125. You rock little one.
    Please, Please Stick. Mommy, Daddy and Big Sis love you so much.
    BabyFruit Ticker
    Our Totsicle is getting so big!
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
    Report Reply
  • ligotsligots
    EEK!  I'm so sorry that happened to you.  People can be so dumb. 
    Report Reply
  • praying*4onepraying*4one
    Big ((HUGS))  I'm sorry 
    Report Reply
  • BathingInBitterBathingInBitter

    Oh honey, I'm so sorry. ((hugs))

    I wish that people who don't know anything about IF would ask before they go assuming things. Did he ever apologize do you? 

    ? We can only appreciate the miracle of a sunrise if we have waited in the darkness... ?

    12/99 - Miscarriage at 12w - 6/08 - BFP - Miscarriage at 8w, 9/08 - BFP - Miscarriage at 8w2d, 12/08 - Found out I am a carrier of a Balanced Translocation between Chromosomes 8 & 16, 8/2010 - DE IVF = FAIL. 12/18/10 - Surprise BFP! Awaiting our Sticky Miracle! 12/20 - Beta #1-1208 * 12/27 Beta #2 - 6002 1/3/11 Beta #3 - 17,146. Beautiful little heart beating away! Stick little one, stick!

    ♥ Brielle Skye born August 17th, 2011 ♥ Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    Report Reply
  • ked1068ked1068
    Wow. I'm stunned. I'm glad your friend quickly corrected him!!
    Lilypie Waiting to Adopt tickers
    3 IUI's, 2 IVF's , 1 FET , 1 IVF w/ Gestational Carrier, and 1 FET using adopted embryo's = ALL BFNs
    We are adopting!

    SAIF/PAIF IS ALWAYS WELCOMED TO POST IN MY POSTS!!!
    Report Reply
  • NicoleeBonsaiNicoleeBonsai member

    Oh my goodness, that is awful. I can't imagine. Ugh, I know your boss didn't mean anything by it, but are you still going to discuss it with him? Unless he's heard about a BFP from you, he shouldn't be making announcements based on assumptions.

    So, so sorry ((HUGS))

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • scooterqscooterq member
    That is terrible!  I am so so sorry! 
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • Ginger71Ginger71 member
    I'm sorry. If there is 1 thing I have learned throughout this whole journey, it is how to be more sensitive to thse around me. I was always a girl with great manners, but I am just so much more sensitive to people's feelings now...and not just about IF. Your boss could use a lesson from Miss Manners! (hug)
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • MyShellyBellyMyShellyBelly
    I can imagine how painful that had to be. Although it was unintended to be hurtful, it still would be. (((hugs)))
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • STL34STL34 member
    I am so sorry.  I can imagine how painful that would be.  ((hugs))

    imageimage


    ~SAIF/PAIF/Everyone Welcome~ 

    Me= 37 and DH = 41 

    Dx: DOR, Endo, APA+ (really high beta 2 glycoprotein antibody and high everything else tested), heterozygous MTHFR mutation, positive for lupus anticoagulant, high FSH, low AMH and both tubes blocked (per HSG on 3/8/11)

    IVF #1 - long lupron (with HGH, intralipids, lovenox and BA); 4 retrieved, 3 fertilized; ET 2 blasts and 1 frozen = BFN

    IVF #2 - a version of antagonist with EPP (with HGH, intralipids, lovenox and BA); 6 retrieved, 4 mature, 3 fertilized, 2 blasts and 1 frozen blast transferred on day 5 = BFN.

    IVF #3 April was postponed to May, May was canceled. June/July was canceled. Had a cyst aspiration and then began IVF #3 in August. ER on 8/22; ET on 8/24 with AH. +HPT on 9/5. Beta #1 (11dpo) = 3; Beta #2 (15dpo) = 29; Beta #3 (17dpo) = 60; Beta #4 (19 dpo) = 118. Heartbeat at 6 weeks 6 days =132.  Lil is here!

    TTC#2:  Trigger + TI = BFN; Clomid + Trigger + IUI = BFN.

    IVF #4:  BCP + MDLF + Lovenox = 7R, 1F = Transferred 1 6-cell embryo on day 3 = BFN

    IVF #5:  MDLF + Lovenox = 4R, 1F = Transferred 1 10-cell compacting embryo on day 3 = BFN

    IVF #6:  (New RE):  Long Antagonist November 2014 (transferred two 8 cell grade 1 embryos and froze one blast) = BFN

    FET#1:  BFN

    Report Reply
  • grazygrazy member
    My mouth just dropped....I'm so sorry you had to go through that. :(
    DS born 7.30.11
    Report Reply
  • SNB2BSNB2B
    Oh I am so sorry, that's awful. Take care of yourself. ((BIG HUGS))
    Report Reply
  • TiffanyA83TiffanyA83 member

    Geez....I'm so sorry! {{HUGS}}

    TTC 7+ years - 3 failed IUI's; not going the IVF route; stopped treatment December 2013.

    Became licensed for Foster Care: March 2011
    Adoption Finalized: December 2013


    LISTEN TO THE MUSN'TS CHILD, LISTEN TO THE DON'TS.
    LISTEN TO THE SHOULDN'TS, THE IMPOSSIBLES, THE WONT'S.
    LISTEN TO THE NEVER HAVES, THEN LISTEN CLOSE TO ME.
    ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN, CHILD, ANYTHING CAN BE.
    -Shel Silverstein


    Report Reply
  • 3citygirl3citygirl

    Thanks everyone.  I feel better about it today.  And my boss did kind of apologize (again, in front of a few coworkers) by saying he knows I'm not pregnant.  He is normally VERY sweet, I think he just had no idea how wrong it was to assume that and then to say that.  His wife was there too so maybe she'll yell at him later.  And honestly, the next time it comes up with him in private, like when I have to ask for a day off again for IF stuff... maybe I'll get a chance to explain better.  If he wasn't my boss, I would handle it much differently... but I feel like I have to make him feel as good as possible about the whole thing.  If it were just a coworker or a random dude on the street, I would have been much more blunt.  

    I had to share here cause I knew you all would understand how much that sucked!  Thank you!!!! 

    PCOS, Hypothyroidism, a ton of IVF... finally it worked => a rough pregnancy => my sweet, sweet son born at 29 weeks 1 day Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
    Report Reply
  • onedaychristinakonedaychristinak
    I swear some people are just clueless! Sorry you had to go through that. On one hand it's nice to fill people in to have their support. On the other hand... They just don't get IF and what NOT to say!! So sorry hun.
    After DX- IF 1996-16 years old; IVF 1 5/2009 BFP! ;MC- 8 W6d- 6/2009
    DX w/ Protein S Deficiency and unexplained thin lining
    Multiple D&C's, Hysterscopy for removal of Scar Tissue, Endometrial Biopsy, 3 BFN FETs, including a year of cancelled due to lining issues (ranging 4.5 to 6.4),
    Procedure of arcuate uterus, Shocking lining development...9.2.
    Moved on to adoption 3/2011
    Homestudy approved! 6/27/2011
    Forever matched! 7/17/2012
    Precious baby boy born 7/30/2012
    SAIF & PAIF Always Welcome
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"