I felt like such a self righteous brat today

brightning

I get so worked up about not wanting my DD to have character toys or Barbies and all sorts of other stuff. I spend hours researching and agonizing over every little toy purchase and considering what skills it'll teach her.

And then my sister came today and bought DD a Sea World trainer Barbie, and DD absolutely loves it. She's spent a lot of today reenacting the Shamu show and "braiding" the doll's hair. She never once commented on Barbie's ridiculous proportions or glittery eye shadow or high heels.

I was so embarrassed at the store when we walked up to the counter with the Barbie - like all of my friends from my liberal arts college were staring over my shoulder, judging me for subjecting my 3 yo daughter to every negative stereotype about women embodied in a single (plastic!) toy.

But you know what? She had fun with it. And I played with Barbies and turned out OK. So maybe I need to lighten up a bit and let the kid play with a darn Barbie every now and again.

The end.

Mysterious_wife

You know Allie has never noticed that Barbie has boobs or looks until my brother said something about it.  I think it is all in how you teach your child.  Let her play with the Barbie, just don' let her know how you feel about Barbie. 

Honestly, Barbie's look don't seem appropriate to most of us, but we all played with them growing up.  I don't think I have a different view on woman due to her.  

MamaNikki

Sounds like Mommy had a moment today.  I guess it's good to be flexible sometimes. 

omurray

No, a self righteous brat would have made a huge deal about it to your sister and made her feel stupid for bringing them!!!   You are just trying to do the right thing for your daughter, and that makes you a good mommy.  We all live and learn.  Doesn't mean you have to run out and redecorate her bedroom in Barbie madness, but 1 simple doll seems to be supplying loads of fun right now and that's great.  And, ya know, as a child it NEVER occurred to me that Barbie was misproportioned.  In fact, it never even occurred to me to compare her to real people at all. 

susanmosley

I love this post. 

Mrs.Hizzo

One of my graduate professors used to talk about how she always said she would NEVER allow her daughter to watch Disney princess movies because she felt they promoted such negative stereotypes about women. Then her daughter turned five and went to kindergarten and started begging for the DVDs, and she gave in. She said she hated it, but she just couldn't be "that mom." So now they have all the movies except for The Little Mermaid. She stood her ground on The Little Mermaid, lol.

kada626

I have a hard time believing any toy doll is going to cause my daughter health or body issues. When I was a kid, I never looked at barbie's figure and compared it to people either. It was just a fun toy that I enjoyed dressing up. I'm positive that my dds have great role models in their lives that they aren't going to look to barbie. Said that, we only have one barbie right now. I'm sure there will be more in time. I like the diversity of the barbie of the world collection. I like that barbie has so many careers choices like a doctor, a vet, police officer or astronaut even though she can never hold a job.

I will be picky about which barbie dolls she plays with & what kind of clothes we get for it. I wouldn't purchase any high end hooker looking barbies.

neverblushed

I'm right there with you.  I have never bought Barbies for my DD, and I try to stay away from really gender-stereotyped toys.  BUT... occasionally people get my kids stuff that I wouldn't.  One of DH's coworkers got DD the Baby Doctor Barbie when DS was born.  My DD loved the toy, and played with it a lot.  She plays with Barbies if she visits friends who have them -- although they're more into computers, video games, and music now, sigh!

It's even harder when DS wants something "girly."  He wanted a Hello Kitty lunchbox for a while.  I steered him away from it gently, but I felt like a total hypocrite doing it.  I would never steer my DD away from a Hot Wheels lunch box!

Sometimes this gender thing is SO hard!

HarrietNJMommy

I played with Barbie's growing up and never once thought about how they are not "proportionate". I'm picky with WHICH Barbie's my DD's play with but I haven't bought them any - they've gotten them as gifts.

Everything in moderation. I have 3 kids, so I NEED to relax with stuff like this otherwise I'll drive myself absolutely bonkers.

Oh, and for the PP, my DS wears glittery pink shoes (his sisters's), carries purses, and will ONLY carry a pink Cinderella lunchbox. I have NO ISSUES with it, and when my DH tried to take it away from DS all hell broke loose.....it's a phase. Kids like to dress up - even boys! LOL!

momofolivia

oh Bright - I'm so simliar to you.  I cringed when DD wanted a Disney princess book from the library.  But I got it for her.  And when the words say "What is a princess?  A princess is...."  I substitute "girl" for "princess"  I just can't help it.

I played with barbies growing up.  I have body issues.  Do the two go hand-in-hand...::Shrug::: but I know I spent more time figuring out what clothes barbie should wear and what her hair should look like than running around outside or doing physical activities.