s/o Redshirting Kindergarten

myrall

Yes, that's actually what the phenomenon's been called. Many news outlets have covered it and here are some articles for reference:

https://www.slate.com/id/2196423

https://www.newsweek.com/blogs/nurture-shock/2009/09/03/should-children-redshirt-kindergarten.html

https://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,959029,00.html

Personally, I'm on the side of starting children with their peers and not holding them back unless it's psychologically necessary and stated as so by a professional. 

maykat

Very interesting reads:)

We will not be red-shirting Alec who is 6/21. 

Kids are sponges so I'm happy that there will be older kids in Alec's class.  I think he will grow from their knowledge and maturity  

 

DzsGirl

Guess its what every parent decides is best for their kids. We are holding Grant back (guess you can call it "red-shirting"....but we aren't keeping him out of school completely...he went to 3yr preschool and will go to 4yr Pre-K 2x). With an August birthday we feel he will be better served waiting a year, and its my job as his parent to make sure he isn't "bored' when he starts school.

kep

Thanks for the links--will have to check them out. What's funny is that when I was in school ... kids who were really bright were allowed to skip grades. Do they still do that? Or maybe they were the kids who were redshirted to begin with. hahaha

UGAbride

Interesting articles!  Personally, I think it should be looked at on a child-by-child basis (ie. parents decision, which it is)...I can definitely see holding back a summer birthday, but I'd wait and see close to time.  Jack will be 5.5 when he starts (March), and Ethan will be almost 6 (September), so I don't feel like I have any decisions to make.

seasidebride05

As a Kindergarten teacher I can tell you that it really just depends on the child.  I have had kids who were held out a year and they still weren't ready for Kindergarten.  I have had others who turned 5 on the first day of school and they were completely ready both socially and academically.  Sometimes it is a great decision for the child, sometimes not.

A year difference at this age is HUGE and it breaks my heart to see 5 year olds being labeled as not ready or behind for Kindergarten, when really they are right where a Kindergartener should be and are being compared against a 6 year b/c that is what half of their class is made up of.  It's not like it used to be where you might have a an age range of 9 months between classmates--now it can be well over a year.

noyoucomehere

I must live under a rock because I didn't even know this whole decision that has to be made by parents even existed. I personally don't think it's an issue and I'm not sure why people are so concerned about their younger kids being in a class with older kids. I understand that people want their children to succeed. I do too. But, I also want them to fail. We'll always be there to help them get back up until they can do it on their own, but we won't always be there to protect them from everything. Maybe I'm off my rocker.

myrall

noyoucomehere:

I must live under a rock because I didn't even know this whole decision that has to be made by parents even existed. I personally don't think it's an issue and I'm not sure why people are so concerned about their younger kids being in a class with older kids. I understand that people want their children to succeed. I do too. But, I also want them to fail. We'll always be there to help them get back up until they can do it on their own, but we won't always be there to protect them from everything. Maybe I'm off my rocker.

Nope. Not off your rocker. I totally agree. Talk about "first world" issues, eh?

rara855

noyoucomehere:

I must live under a rock because I didn't even know this whole decision that has to be made by parents even existed. I personally don't think it's an issue and I'm not sure why people are so concerned about their younger kids being in a class with older kids. I understand that people want their children to succeed. I do too. But, I also want them to fail. We'll always be there to help them get back up until they can do it on their own, but we won't always be there to protect them from everything. Maybe I'm off my rocker.

Nope, I honestly can say I hadn't heard of it either.

As a child that turned 5, 3 weeks before kindergarten and was always a year behind everything (driving, drinking, ect) my peers. I was even in college a month before I was 18.  I wouldn't have changed it to be the same age or more "on track" with my own peers. I get that each child is different and especially now that we have the autistic spectrum that really wasn't even thought of when I started school. Maybe you would make that choice for that reason but, just so they wouldn't ever fail? I am with you failure makes us stronger and teaches us compassion. It may have been a bummer to not be able socially to do some of the same things at the same time but, educationally I guess you catch up so quickly it was never an issue. 

MrsBrandiGreene

I actually was one of those kids who skipped a grade.  I had two weeks of the 2nd grade and was moved to 3rd.  I have to say, with lots of hindsight, that if I had to choose to move my child up a grade....I would decline.  I handled everything fine from an academic perspective, but socially it was VERY hard.  I struggled until I was probably in the 7th grade...scars I still have today.

That said...maybe there's a big difference in making this call earlier than my parents did.....before kids become so mean?   

julienandy

I know at the parochial school I went to they do this which I am totally fine with.  If they don't feel a kid is ready, then they can push the issue and if the school pushes back, well its probably not the right school for them.  My BFF held her daughter back to pre-1st and she says for her and her daughter it the best decision she ever made.  Her DD was smaller than normal and emotionally a little behind.  She found her own in pre1st and has since thrived.....top of her class and fully confident. 

Now I know from reading might sound weird to do, but for my friend her DD got the self confidence and self esteem we as parents would all like to see our kids having. i know her family thought it was nuts.....we all went to school "early" back in the day, we all have fall birthdays and started grade 1 when we were 5.  i had very litle self esteem growing up, but wondering to this day if things would have been different if  my parents had waited to follow the Sept 1st rule. I tested fine and they let me in which makes me laugh now as NO WAY they would let a kid with birthday after Sept 1st in.

I don't think its a bad thing at all....and you can't judge unless you are in those shoes.

julienandy

Oh Myra, my friend wasn't thinking "I want my DD to be top of her class" when she held her back....she just wanted to see her a little more confident in school and outgoing. Her DD is very smart, but she also works very hard to do well and is at the top of her class now...going into 8th grade.

myrall

julienandy:

Oh Myra, my friend wasn't thinking "I want my DD to be top of her class" when she held her back....she just wanted to see her a little more confident in school and outgoing. Her DD is very smart, but she also works very hard to do well and is at the top of her class now...going into 8th grade.

Julie, I didn't say it was bad. A parent knows their child best. Heck, my own parents kept me out of a free year of kindergarten at Woodward because they were seriously concerned about my size! I might've been mentally huge, but I was tiny in stature. And Lord knows, my mouth has ALWAYS written checks my body couldn't cash.

Obviously there are exceptions everywhere. When it's in the best interest of the child emotionally, socially and physically - then of course, hold them back. But who's to say that only bad things happen when these kids are challenged by "bigger" and "smarter" students? They could actually blossom. And then you get into the larger issue of fear of failure. I completely agree that my child will fail - many times. And I'll be there to comfort her, but I may not always be there to pick her up. It's part of growing up.

How it sometimes can appear is that many parents are simply trying to position their children for an unnatural advantage. Just like the PP said - there are kindergarteners that are right on track, but compared to the kids nearly an entire year older than them, they're going to look behind!

You start to get into class issues and, as the one study stated, poor children are very often left behind because they don't have the benefit (or parents with the insight or financial means) of being kept behind. 

tmhopkins13

As a parent that has a child that skipped kindergarten because academically she was ready-it seemed like a great idea at the time I'm sure smart don't want them to be bored yada yada, but as a parent that now has a 16 year old that is a senior in high school, don't so much think it's a good idea-the things that are discussed and done as 16 year olds and 18 year olds totally different things!!

hthomas02

I didn't know it was a decision to be made either until someone asked me about it recently and I kind of looked at them cross-eyed and it wasn't until reading the comments in the earlier post that it even made any sense why it would happen.  I was youngest in my class with a November birthday but I'm totally smart and gifted so it was no big deal.  hahahaha  love this topic that it came up today though, I've learned a lot.  I've got bigger issues though, since I live in the ghetto I have to decide what school to even send my kids to which is not an easy decision.

ally-cat

hthomas02:

I didn't know it was a decision to be made either until someone asked me about it recently and I kind of looked at them cross-eyed and it wasn't until reading the comments in the earlier post that it even made any sense why it would happen.  I was youngest in my class with a November birthday but I'm totally smart and gifted so it was no big deal.  hahahaha  love this topic that it came up today though, I've learned a lot.  I've got bigger issues though, since I live in the ghetto I have to decide what school to even send my kids to which is not an easy decision.

Dammit Heather, I knew you were so talented and gifted, I was waiting for you to chime in and have a solution.  Thanks for nothing!  ; )

Oh, and yeah, picking a decent school around us will be a fun project too.

Melliebugs

ally-cat:

hthomas02:

I didn't know it was a decision to be made either until someone asked me about it recently and I kind of looked at them cross-eyed and it wasn't until reading the comments in the earlier post that it even made any sense why it would happen.  I was youngest in my class with a November birthday but I'm totally smart and gifted so it was no big deal.  hahahaha  love this topic that it came up today though, I've learned a lot.  I've got bigger issues though, since I live in the ghetto I have to decide what school to even send my kids to which is not an easy decision.

Dammit Heather, I knew you were so talented and gifted, I was waiting for you to chime in and have a solution.  Thanks for nothing!  ; )

Oh, and yeah, picking a decent school around us will be a fun project too.

 You two should look into the transfer program I did for my older kids.  It is schools of choice.  So far it has been a good decision.  umm and of course you are talented and gifted Heather....but I don't get how you were the youngest if you are in November.  Wouldn't that make you the oldest?  Were your cutoffs different than Sept.1? 

hthomas02

yes our cut-off was November 1st, I'm november 2nd so my mom pleaded to let me go and so off I went.  she couldn't get me out of the house soon enough. 

maykat

Both DH and I grew up in the NE (NY and MA) and our cut-offs were 12/31.  .

I kind of wish there was a national standard on the cut-off date.

jade_sweatpea

maykat:

Both DH and I grew up in the NE (NY and MA) and our cut-offs were 12/31.  .

I kind of wish there was a national standard on the cut-off date.

This! It needs to be standard. Istartedschool in NJ I am 9 months younger than my bff we both graduated from the same high school here. I don't think age should really matter but I know that I know that I may be in the minority here. I never went to 3rd grade and I will say that it was pretty difficult to go to 4th grade (socially) because that was middle school in NJ. One thing I can say coming from another state to GA is that the school system here is shotty but that is another post.

K&P414

I swore I'd never have kids that were either the oldest or youngest in the class.  With September 1st being the current magic day I've got BOTH kids in that predicament. Emma is one of the oldest in her class w/ a Sept 10th bday and Tess, who was due at the end up Sept ended up just getting under the wire on August 26th.  We plan to redshirt her.  No way am I sending my child a full year ahead to school just because I delivered 4 weeks early. 

care99

K&P414:

I swore I'd never have kids that were either the oldest or youngest in the class.  With September 1st being the current magic day I've got BOTH kids in that predicament. Emma is one of the oldest in her class w/ a Sept 10th bday and Tess, who was due at the end up Sept ended up just getting under the wire on August 26th.  We plan to redshirt her.  No way am I sending my child a full year ahead to school just because I delivered 4 weeks early. 

Ditto this - Colin is Sept. 5, so will be the oldest b/c of the 9/1 cutoff.  Hayden is Aug. 13, so would be the youngest and they would only be a year apart in school, so we'll hold him back.