Thank you to the poster re: 4 y.o attitude

Junebride2be2

Lurking here and saying a big hello! After reading the responses it's refreshing to feel that I'm not so alone. I have a 4 y.o, a 2 y.o and I'm 33 weeks pg; I stay at home and at least 4 days out of the week my dh travels so I'm doing this on my own. ( I can't even imagine what single mom's go through, superprops to them!!)

I feel as though I don't even recognize my 4 y.o. at times. Like one poster stated, my DD can be the sweetest and emphatic little girl but boy she's got an attitude. I try to keep my cool, but not being a saint I lose it with her. I try to get her to go in her room so we both can "cool down", but all I get in return is refusal and more sassing and back talk. I think the hardest part of it too is when their daddy does come home, our schedule goes to hell in a handbasket. I've become a yeller which I totally despise. I recognize this but trying to rationalize with my 4 y.o. is virtually impossible. I've tried to talk to her, ask her to pick up her toys, etc....but it falls upon deaf ears until I do lose my patience.

She starts school in 2 weeks and I'm hoping that this will be for the best for both of us.

mlm1128

I argue with my 4 yo dd at least 3-4 times a day.  She is 4 going on 25 and the attitude kills me.  My husband is constantly telling both of us to stop bickering, but I am sorry...a 4 yo is not going to win an argument with me just because it will be easier.  I guess I am just as stubborn as she is.

I can't tell you how many times a day I repeat the phrases "this is not a democracy" and "I'm a little bit tired of the back talk". Yet 10 minutes later she is apologizing and telling me how much she loves me.  They are manipulative little things, and you have to be impressed at how their minds work.

DandR

mlm1128:

I argue with my 4 yo dd at least 3-4 times a day.  She is 4 going on 25 and the attitude kills me.  My husband is constantly telling both of us to stop bickering, but I am sorry...a 4 yo is not going to win an argument with me just because it will be easier.  I guess I am just as stubborn as she is.

OMG, my DH does this and it drives me nuts.  They aren't WINNING the argument JUST because they got the last word in.  My DH thinks he HAS to get the last word in.  No, if they are in their room and dealing with a punishment.....I win.  Even if they stomp to their room saying "NO FAIR!"  or whatever.
Seriously...arguing and bickering with a 3/4/5/6 year old is my biggest pet peeve. 

But I'm a mean mom.  No compromise.  "Go to your room" and they go.  When DH is around....they whine to try and get out of it......

sarahslost

You're welcome, and I wish you all the best.  I have a 2 yr old along with my lovely 4yr old (2yr old is almost 3), and I can NOT imagine putting another child into that mix.

Honestly though, good luck to you, and enjoy that little baby!

Junebride2be2

sarahslost:

You're welcome, and I wish you all the best.  I have a 2 yr old along with my lovely 4yr old (2yr old is almost 3), and I can NOT imagine putting another child into that mix.

Honestly though, good luck to you, and enjoy that little baby!

 Thanks!!! I try to remember "one day at a time" and pray daily for us to have a good day

mlm1128

Oh DandR, she doesn't listen when I send her to her room!  Only when dh does.  I wish it were that easy. 

I don't just argue with her to get the last word though, it's important stuff.  For example, Saturday she decided to tell me she wasn't brushing her teeth.   DH told me to just go to Target without her.  Dude, whether she comes with me or not, she IS brushing her teeth before I leave this house!  That's one of those this is not a democracy things...they don't get to out vote me!!

shopgirl78

Junebride, I was just thinking about you the other day.  Congrats on your pregnancy!  The beginning of 4 was a challenge for us however it has gotten better.  GL!