Need opinions on what I should do-if anything. — The Bump
Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Need opinions on what I should do-if anything.

Good morning ladies. I found out last night that tomorrow will be theanniversary of my boyfriend's sister son's death. My boyfriend doesn't talk about it that much but I know he was born and died at alittle over 2 months from SIDS. It is really hard on his and especially on his sister and mother. I have gotten really close to his sister and his mother since we will be family sometime next year and of course with my pregnancy (she had a miscarriage, then SIDS, and has a 5 year old with disabilites) I really want to do something for her but don't want to be inappropriate because I am sure its going to be a hard day for her. I am already having my boyfriends 2 best friends take him golfing tomorrow so he is taken care of. Any suggestions or comments would be great. If you think I shouldn't do anything please tell me I don't want to make it worse then what it probably will already be since his birthday would be a week after tomorrow too.

Its a girl!! Cameron Rae born 1/8/13 @ 501am Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Re: Need opinions on what I should do-if anything.

  • I think you should definitely acknowledge the day.  Have you asked her what she wants to do?  Does she have any hobbies you can tap into (hiking, cycling, etc.)? 
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    We love and miss you Jillian (18w) and Peanut (6w). Welcome to our TAC miracle Jacob!
  • I don't know if she owns a house or not but maybe a flower or tree to plant in honor of the baby would be a nice gesture. As far as taking her out or doing something to keep her mind busy you could ask her if she would like to spend some time with you and do something like PP said related to a hobby or just go to dinner or something with her and possibly FMIL too. She may not want to do anything because she would like to grieve on her own and that is fine too, but just knowing that you offered and made the thought of it will be enough of a gift to her.
    6/28/10: Lost our sweet baby Addyston at 18wk 1day to pPROM 7/24/11: Michael William born at 24wk 2d due to IC after an emergent cerclage at 18wks, 4wk home BR and 2 weeks hospital BR. Grow strong our little Miracle! 9/17/11: Michael joined his sister in heaven after 8 amazing weeks with us on earth. He fought a very hard fight but NEC was too much for him in the end. Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
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  • elisbuelisbu member

    I would send flowers in the color of her babeis birth stone, then even if she does not want to do anything, she'll know you were thinking about her.

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