Parenting after 35

Need to vent **UPDATE**

Just need to vent to understanding ears.  So DH just got back from one of his "work" trips (you may remember his job as a travel writer for mostly high end lo-cals) five days in Hawaii.  Fine, it is what he does.  But that doesn't mean I'm not tired as V who has always slept pretty well is teething and has had a rough week.  So I've been dealing with short sleep nights, my full time job, long commute and organizing for our trip to Columbus this week to my brothers wedding.  I'm exhausted.  So when he tells me he may have to drive (3.5 hours drive) separately tomorrow because he may have to cover an event for a major newpaper, I feel guilty because while it is an awsome opportunity, I really want to just spend the drive tomorrow sleeping.  And to top it off he is at home napping off the jetlag waiting to see if they need him for the assignment.  Napping! 

He is a fantastic father and has always supported my career and I have supported his...but is it awful I am quietly hoping maybe they don't need him afterall?...I think I just really want him to be able to come to my office do my job for the afternoon and I get to be the one to take the nap.....that would make it all better.

Re: Need to vent **UPDATE**

  • M.AmyM.Amy member
    A long drive when you are tired sucks and alone sucks even more.  I am sorry. :(
  • steverstever member
    Not awful at all. It sounds like you really need a break. I think you should tell your DH.
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  • Yeah, as wonderful as he is, maybe it's time for a little chat.  Not a big chat, just a talk about how exhausted you are and how much you need some good rest, and when he thinks he can help make that happen.

    Much sympathy! 

    You are likely to be eaten by a grue. Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker image
  • It sounds like you have had a rough week.  Is there any way at all to work it out so you can drive together even if he does have to cover the event?  You could always nap at the hotel while you wait for him!

    Hope it works out.  GL!

    DD1 is 3, DD2 is 1.
  • I feel your pain. My husband is a physician and he often works on weekends and does emergency precedures at nights. I work 9 to 5. Our son is 3 and super-active, and I am pregnant and always tired right now. When my husband naps during a day after working the previous night I try not to bother him. We also drive in separate cars when he is on-call (not for 3.5 h though). Maybe your husband is not saving lives but it's his work and he makes money for the family. If he is a great father otherwise I would let it go.
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  • Oh vent away .... (Lord knows I've done enough of that this week - LOL) .... this is what we are here for.  Personally, I would mention it in passage how tired you are and see if he catches on... Hopefully he will and try to change the plans and/or maybe rearrange something.  Good luck and get as much rest as possible.

    BTW - Vivian is SO cute in that siggy pic!  :o)

    image Nicholas Jacob born on 06/30/2009, 9.5lbs and 21 1/4" long Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Joshua Scott 5.3lbs & Jonathan Matthew 6.2lbs, born 08/31/10 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Thank you.  I'm actually embarrassed by my rant when I see busybea weigh in. Gesh, I was really just tired.  Never one to just let it go we had a nice long talk about how I was feeling and DH was very sympathetic.  The assignment ended up not happening after all since the Friday news cycle is pretty dead - so we will drive together.  I took a nice long soak, went to bed at 10 and DH worked until 2am catch up on work he needed to tend to while he was gone and did our laundry.  V or course was a saint for Daddy and went to bed at 8 woke up just to feed at 4 (I still BF and 8 hours seems to be as long as she can STTN) and is still sleeping at 7:30.

    Ahhh a new day.....

  • Don't feel bad for feeling like that, I would be pissed and very resentful. You got a lot on your plate and deserve to nap too. Any chance DH could give you a day "off" so you can rest or go out sans baby? I need to get away sometimes (like for a pedicure) or I'll go nuts.
    Me: 44 DH: 42. DS born healthy at 40 weeks 8/24/09. TTC since then with no luck or ART. Surprise BFP 8/6/14... MMC @ 8 weeks 4 days... Miss you everyday sweet baby angel.
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