MIL Vent (long)

praline

My in-laws rent a beach house in August for their children, their children's spouses, and their grandchildren to vacation together for one week.  SIL has two teenage children who get their own room.  BIL and his wife have two children (ages 2 and 4) my DH and I have two children (ages 1 and 3) and my other BIL is single with no kids.  Last year the BIL with children arrived at the house first and he and his wife took the master bedroom upstairs (more room than the other rooms).  Totally fine.  MIL and FIL had already previously requested a room downstairs so they wouldn't have to climb stairs to get to their room.  Fine.  We took a smaller room. 

This year BIL with two small children decided they didn't want the master bedroom (his wife wants to hear the ocean from a room closer to the front of the house).  My DH then mentioned to his brother that we would then love to have that room because of its size.  My MIL then tells us this weekend that she has offered the master bedroom to SIL and her husband because, "she is my daughter."  WTF?  SIL isn't going to take that room because she and her husband don't mind taking another room (which has the same size bed) so we can have more room for the pack and play and air mattress for our two kids.  But seriously I don't get my MIL.  My DH is her son, so why the heck would she first offer the room to SIL  because she is her daughter?  They are two adults and we are four people with little kids who nap.  Why would she not want to offer the room to us?

Bah...this is obviously a nice problem to have but I almost would rather pay for my own place to stay than be a part of these weird little games my MIL comes up with as she doles out these room Godfather style.  Would you be perturbed in this situation?  Tell me how to ignore her passive aggressive crap at the beach.

shopgirl_07

Yeah, that's annoying. I guess it's the price you pay for a "free" vacation, seems like something like this always comes up. Is your SIL going to take the room? Maybe she'll be understanding and let you guys have it. Or, you could always get there first and claim it

veloelle

Knock boots on the bed....claimed.

There is always drama w/ family events. Accept it before you go, it will be easier to deal with. People that are PA can really suck, but it's generally their hang ups, not anything specifically about you, kwim?

peekaboo716

praline:

My MIL then tells us this weekend that she has offered the master bedroom to SIL and her husband because, "she is my daughter."  WTF?  SIL isn't going to take that room because she and her husband don't mind taking another room (which has the same size bed) so we can have more room for the pack and play and air mattress for our two kids.  But seriously I don't get my MIL.  My DH is her son, so why the heck would she first offer the room to SIL  because she is her daughter?  They are two adults and we are four people with little kids who nap.  Why would she not want to offer the room to us?

This sounds like something my ex's mother would say. She seriously had some kind of hierarchy for her children. It was bizarre. It's actually one of the reasons why he is an ex.

dnagal

I'd mention it to SIL.  See if she'll take the lead on claiming the smaller room so that you guys can have the kids bunk in comfortably.

jlw2505

I could so see my MIL doing something like this.  It is all about a power trip and having control over things.  Plus there is something about a daughter to a mother, not sure what it is but I can tell you my MIL treats my DH way different than my SILs (her daughters) and no comparision to how I am treated compared to my BILs.

praline

Thank you ladies.  I'll have to take along a few nice bottles of wine!