Dissapointing OB Visit

--halo--

I was so excited to go in and see my OB today.  I thought he would be able to help me out with some of my symptoms and that it would be encouraging and that I would get to see baby on an ultrasound.

 Well, I told him about my troubling symptoms, I've been having a lot of heart pounding/racing all day, some cramping, and some tightness in my esophogas after eating. 

 He basically told me that I'm having panic attacks and that I should stop worrying so much.  Weeelll, I don't think I'm having panic attacks and I told him that.  I don't feel worried about anything, none of my symptoms are particularly worrisome, I just want to know if I can do anything to get rid of them!  But he kept saying that I just need to stop worrying and relax.  Big help.  NOT.

He even rushed me up on the examining table to get a HB reading while I was in the middle of questions.  There wasn't anyone in the waiting room, so I don't know why he was in such a hurry.

He asked me if I've felt the baby move yet, which I really don't think I have, and looked at me like that was really odd. 

 Then I find out that I have to wait another 3 WEEKS to do the anatomy scan and can't do an US today.   

So now I feel like abnormal because I haven't felt the baby move yet, and I don't know how to take care of my symptoms, plus I have to wait another 3 weeks.  Totally bummed.

Chick7806

Boo! That does sound disappointing. New OB time maybe? I mean this will be the person delivering your child. I would at least contemplate it. 

--halo--

I would feel weird getting a new OB.  I wish I had 'shopped' around a bit more before I went to him, but he was recommended by my family doctor, and our first appointment was great.  Admittedly every appointment after that has left me feeling even more confused... but I don't know if I can just drop him. 

Ack..

LuckyladyJ

so he didn't take a listen for Heart Beat?  Weird!!!

Chick7806

--halo--:

I would feel weird getting a new OB.  I wish I had 'shopped' around a bit more before I went to him, but he was recommended by my family doctor, and our first appointment was great.  Admittedly every appointment after that has left me feeling even more confused... but I don't know if I can just drop him. 

Ack..

Maybe give it one more appointment? I just think that I would have to reconsider someone who didn't take my valid concerns seriously.

I love, love my doctor. She spends a long time on each question that I have. She is very laid back, and I am so glad she is going to deliver my child. I think everyone should have faith and confidence in their doc. But I do know that it would be a tough call. GL girl. )  

rainydayluck

I would talk with him about how he made you feel. I am going to talk to my OB because although I really really like her, at my last appointment she made me feel rushed. I figured I would approach it like: "So I was thinking that if you let me know at the beginning of an appointment that you are in a hurry, I can save some of my less pressing questions for the next time." I don't know about your doctor, but my doctor has patients in labor all the time, so sometimes she has patients in labor downstairs (her office is in the hospital). 

 

I also wouldn't worry about the movement thing. I am just now feeling ambiguous movement (only when I am calm and not moving) and my doctor said it could take up to 21 weeks to feel it. 

--halo--

LuckyladyJ:

so he didn't take a listen for Heart Beat?  Weird!!!

 He did, but I was asking a question the whole time, and he didn't even let me know if it sounded ok afterward. 

 Schick - I have/am reconsidering my choice.  But I think in the end I will stay with because I just feel so weird about dropping him.  He's very "don't worry, enjoy yourself!"  He's told me to eat whatever I want and not worry about it, to basically disregard everything I read in pregnancy books. Today I asked him if I should stop sleeping on my back, and he said no!  Sleep however you are comfortable for as long as you want! 

He told me not to worry about ANY symptoms unless I was bleeding, my water broke, or if I had more than 6 contractions in an hour.

Which is nice to know that I don't have to worry about cramping and such, but I want to know if I can alleviate the symptoms that I do have, and WHY they are there.

lrn327

I'm sorry your visit was so disappointing.  It really sucks when they don't even take the time to listen to you.  Is there another OB you might want to consider?  I did want to comment though because your situation sounds exactly like me last year (before getting pregnant, obviously).  All of the sudden I could NOT breathe.  It was just a horrible feeling and it set off this year-long chain of doctors and tests.  I visited four different types of doctors and was told during that year that I had asthma, acid reflux disease, non-acid reflux, thyroid problems, a heart condition, and yes, panic attacks.  It was a really difficult time with so may visits, tests, medications (with side effects) and ultimately discomfort and frustration.  Ultimately, I ended up at a doctor who I feel gave me my life back.  He is a gastroenterologist and finally really listened to me and all that I had been through.  After a thorough examination, he brought up the possibility of panic attacks.  I said I was pretty sure that wasn't it and was very firm telling him so.  The more we discussed it though, I became open to the idea because nothing else had worked.  He told me that most of all, I just needed "reassurance therapy".  Thinking this was something else I had to pay for, I asked what it was.  He said it was just him reassuring me that I was healthy and really going to be okay.  He advised me to consult with a therapist if I thought it would help but mostly focusing on relaxing activities and knowing that I was really okay would benefit me the most.  I decided to just "try" the diagnosis on myself and guess what, it worked!  I know that sounds corny and I was SO opposed to it for so long, but honestly, I feel great now.  If I start to feel that shortness of breath again, I can now reassure myself and just try something relaxing - yoga, walk, bath, etc.  Of course, your situation could certainly be this or anything else.  Particularly since you are pregnant, you should definitely continue to pursue getting your symptoms checked out. Don't let them dismiss your valid concerns but do try to be open do anything you hear.   Maybe try your primary care doctor to start with?  I wish you the best and hope you are feeling better very soon!

lrn327

Sorry, I see your note about reconsidering the OB.  My first post just took me a long time so didn't see the other ones first!

--halo--

lrn327:

Sorry, I see your note about reconsidering the OB.  My first post just took me a long time so didn't see the other ones first!

Thats fine!   Thank you for your first post, it sounds like you really went through an ordeal to find out what worked for you!  I'm glad you got it figured out though. 

I'm having a hard time thinking that it is panic attacks, simply because I don't think I'm worrying about things at the moment my heart starts racing.  But I'm starting a 'symptom journal' to document what I'm doing/thinking about and what I've eaten recently to see if there is a pattern. 

I'll definitely give your therapy a try when I do feel like that though, it couldn't hurt.

--halo--

mands629:

Of course you can drop an OB!  And it won't hurt you to shop around, just to check out your options.  I found my OB by asking on my local Bump/Nest board and by calling the hospital where I wanted to deliver and getting referals based on what you're looking for.  Even if you don't drop your current OB, I think it would give you peace of mind knowing that you checked out your other options.  And it's never to late to change OBs.

I'm sorry to hear that things were rushed.  You could always try calling your general doctor and describing your symptoms.  Maybe they can give you some suggestions.  And don't worry about the movement.  I haven't felt anything yet either.

 I think I'll give him one more appointment like Schick suggested and if I still feel the same way about him I will shop around.   I keep giving him the benefit of the doubt because my family Dr. said he was so popular and well liked.    Thanks for the encouragement!

lrn327

--halo--:

lrn327:

Sorry, I see your note about reconsidering the OB.  My first post just took me a long time so didn't see the other ones first!

Thats fine!   Thank you for your first post, it sounds like you really went through an ordeal to find out what worked for you!  I'm glad you got it figured out though. 

I'm having a hard time thinking that it is panic attacks, simply because I don't think I'm worrying about things at the moment my heart starts racing.  But I'm starting a 'symptom journal' to document what I'm doing/thinking about and what I've eaten recently to see if there is a pattern. 

I'll definitely give your therapy a try when I do feel like that though, it couldn't hurt.

 

Keeping the journal sounds like a great idea.  Hopefully it will help you find your answer faster this way.  No kidding, but I really wish I had thought of that a long time ago!  It probably would have helped a lot. 

KatieM1106

Bummer. Does the practice have a nurse that you can call and talk to over the phone?

mel.lc

Just because he's popular and well-liked doesn't necessarily mean he's right for YOU, though.  Especially if he makes you feel silly for not feeling any movement yet - my docs were VERY clear that most first time moms don't feel anything until weeks 16-18. Like Irn327, I'm another anxiety attack gal, and that's what it sounds like, although it is REALLY strange that you don't feel anxious.  I used to get them sometimes (and still do, although very rarely) when I wasn't actually worrying... it's like there was a chemical reaction of some kind in there that had NOTHING to do with anything in the rest of my life or the present moment.  Unfortunately, I know nothing about anything else those symptoms can be, so I'm not that helpful. ;)Regardless, if you're feeling confused by the OB and un-heard in your worries, I really hope that you find someone who suits you better!! 

cc605

aww, I'm sorry you had such a crappy appt. I hope your LO starts moving and grooving soon!

--halo--

KatieM1106:

Bummer. Does the practice have a nurse that you can call and talk to over the phone?

 Yes, and I actually really like the nurse.

 

mel.lc:

Just because he's popular and well-liked doesn't necessarily mean he's right for YOU, though.  Especially if he makes you feel silly for not feeling any movement yet - my docs were VERY clear that most first time moms don't feel anything until weeks 16-18. Like Irn327, I'm another anxiety attack gal, and that's what it sounds like, although it is REALLY strange that you don't feel anxious.  I used to get them sometimes (and still do, although very rarely) when I wasn't actually worrying... it's like there was a chemical reaction of some kind in there that had NOTHING to do with anything in the rest of my life or the present moment.  Unfortunately, I know nothing about anything else those symptoms can be, so I'm not that helpful. ;)Regardless, if you're feeling confused by the OB and un-heard in your worries, I really hope that you find someone who suits you better!! 

 Well I'll be 18 weeks tomorrow, so even by those standards I should have felt something by now.  But it is encouraging to hear that some of you haven't felt movement yet either.  I think maybe I HAVE felt it, but I just haven't recognized it as being the baby.

 The panic attack you describe as being almost like a chemical reaction is exactly what happens to me.  There doesn't seem to be any stimuli except for physical activity, like if I just came up the stairs or have been standing for too long.  But it happens at other random times like if I'm working at my desk, haven't spoken to anyone, and am only thinking about what I am working on and none of it is stressful.  I'm hoping that the journal will help me discover something.

Thanks for the well wishes!

March04b2b

I am sorry that you had such a disappointing visit...I would seek out another OB personally.  It's never too late to do so, best of luck to you!

dougheak

Hey...this really stinks.

I just wanted to let you know that if you are still thinking about the switch, it is manageable.  While I am not as far along as you, I just did it.  I had my first appt. at my new OB just last week.  I think at first they thought I was some kind of terrible pregnant lady that had waited this long to see a doc, but once I explained the situation they were very happy to help.  I am really excited with my new choice.  But, even with all of this I understand your hesitation.  My choice was new insurance related, but I really hope it all works out for you.  I know it will!

LW2410

The closing of your esophagus may be acid reflux. I used to get that before, and it didn't burn. I've been getting palpitations and randomly rapid heartbeat for years now. It has gotten worse during the pregnancy (it was actually my first preg symptom). I'm pretty sure that it is linked to my vagus nerve, which is intertwined with the bowels (I've had a lot of intestinal problems in the past). Changes in my digestion cause a lot of my problems.

I've also heard that it is relatively common for other pregnant women to get these symptoms, especially the palpitations, which makes sense because of the added stress on your bowels during pregnancy.

All of this aside, I think that your idea of keeping a symptom journal is a great one. That way you may be able to pinpoint other factors that may be contributing to your symptoms.

welshgirl

I don't have any suggestions/comments re: some of the symptoms. But re: the appointment, firstly he'd have let you know if the HB wasn't great. Yes, it's bad that he didn't just say 'sounds good'. But that's where the benefit of giving him/her another go comes in. Doctors are only human. Maybe he had an appointment that he couldn't miss so was rushing a bit. If it happened again, talk to the practice nurse about it, see what she says? I wouldn't switch too quickly at 18ish weeks - that's a lot of pressure and stress. If your OB was recommended he's a good, competant, safe doctor to deliver your baby. You may not be a perfect personality fit/etc, but if it were me, I'd not want to worry about switching right now. But GL with things!

sil222

All doctors are different and what we want from them are different, you have to find one that satifies your wants, with my first pregnancy my ob was over cautious and it drove me nuts!!! always getting extra testing, 1/2 hr long visits, it was a bit much or so i thought, i was younger then.  he was also an alarmist and would immediately tell you worst case scenarios which would stress me out.  I, like you, felt that it was too weird to switch so i stuck with him.  This time i interviewed ob's and love the one i choose but if i didn't i wouldn't hesitate to change.  Remember he wasn't assigned to you, you picked him and you have a right to change your mind, it has nothing to do with his medical expertise, just personal preferance, i'm sure he has patients that like that laid back, happy go lucky, approach. 

dec05bride2be

I just wanted to say don't worry about not feeling the baby move yet, with my first I did not feel her until week 20 or later and I still haven't felt this baby yet.  I am not worried and neither was my doc.  

 

Sorry about the other symptoms, I know how difficult it is to not get the answers you are looking for. 

Laurpenn

You can always go to the emergency room if you want an ultrasound sooner than 3 weeks (of course only if you don't get charged a lot for er visits).  Claim abdominal pain.  At least you will be able to have peace of mind when you see the baby & hear it's heart beat. 

No offense to you, but your OB sounds like a ***.  I guess since so many people told you to give him another chance, you should, but would drop him right now.  I didn't get my midwife last time until I was 6 months along, and ended up dropping her when I was in labor because she wanted to pit me right away.  A midwife wanting me on pitocin?  I had much better luck with the on-staff doctors.

You'll want your OB to answer your questions and concerns seriously, and not make you feel like an idiot. Doctors have a wonderful way of doing that.  You should be VERY comfortable with this person, since you will be having one of the most important (if not the most important) experiences in your life with them.  If he doesn't make you feel comfortable & assured, get rid of him. 

  Pregnancy books have lots of very useful info & are not meant to scare you.  Sleeping on your back can be dangerous- the weight of the baby cuts off blood flow to a main artery.  Left side is best for you & baby.  Any doctor that doesn't tell you that is a moron.  Trust me, I know that it sucks, I whine about it every night to my hubby.  A body pillow helps a lot.  These days you have to take some advice from the docs, and then do a lot of your own research.  In this money-driven healthcare system, we unfortunately cannot put all of our trust into our doctors like people used to.  The information is out there, use it.

 If this is your first pregnancy, it's normal to not feel the baby move until 20 weeks.  Don't worry.

 If you do feel like you are having anxiety, or worrying too much, you can try "Bach Flower Essences, Rescue Remedy".  It is perfectly safe for pregnancy, babies, people on meds, kids, everyone!  And it really works.  It helps to quiet your mind if you take a few drops before you go to bed at night.  

 Good Luck to You & Baby!

lulu3061

--halo--:

KatieM1106:

Bummer. Does the practice have a nurse that you can call and talk to over the phone?

 Yes, and I actually really like the nurse.

 

mel.lc:

Justbecause he's popular and well-liked doesn't necessarily mean he's rightfor YOU, though.  Especially if he makes you feel silly for notfeeling any movement yet - my docs were VERY clear that most first timemoms don't feel anything until weeks 16-18.

 Like Irn327, I'manother anxiety attack gal, and that's what it sounds like, although itis REALLY strange that you don't feel anxious.  I used to get themsometimes (and still do, although very rarely) when I wasn't actuallyworrying... it's like there was a chemical reaction of some kind inthere that had NOTHING to do with anything in the rest of my life orthe present moment.  Unfortunately, I know nothing about anything elsethose symptoms can be, so I'm not that helpful.

Regardless, ifyou're feeling confused by the OB and un-heard in your worries, Ireally hope that you find someone who suits you better!! 

 

 Well I'll be 18 weeks tomorrow, so even by those standards I should have felt something by now.  But it is encouraging to hear that some of you haven't felt movement yet either.  I think maybe I HAVE felt it, but I just haven't recognized it as being the baby.

 The panic attack you describe as being almost like a chemical reaction is exactly what happens to me.  There doesn't seem to be any stimuli except for physical activity, like if I just came up the stairs or have been standing for too long.  But it happens at other random times like if I'm working at my desk, haven't spoken to anyone, and am only thinking about what I am working on and none of it is stressful.  I'm hoping that the journal will help me discover something.

Thanks for the well wishes!

So I was having similar symptoms and my OB is referring me to a cardiologist.  He's extremely laid back about things also, definitely not the type of doctor who makes you feel like you need to live in some kind of bubble so the fact that he felt it warranted a second opinion means alot to me.  Maybe your doctor is a little too nonchalant about things.  Even if you give him another chance I would start asking people for who they would recommend, that way you're prepared to switch if needed. 

jenescort

Good idea on keeping a symptom journal. The fact that your heart is racing should have been at least a slight concern to your OB and not a brush off. Granted, I have a heart condition but when I saw my OB at 13 weeks she noticed my heart was racing. Since then I have been put on a low dose beta blocker to try and regulate my heart rate. She said its not good for me or baby for my heart rate to be racing during the pregnancy. Now....keep in mind..I have a heart condition so they are montioring me closesly but it seems like its not all that uncommon for healthy pregnant women to experience heart palpatations and racing heart due to the extra blood load on your heart. Your OB should not have written them off as panic attacks. Not to scare you but it could be something very justifiable on why your having these symptoms other than "panic attacks." If your still having symptoms at your next appointment I would mention them again and your concern. If your doc still blows you off I would look elsewhere.