I decided against it since my LO's are only a year apart...and they are both girls. I made it clear I don't want any showers this time either so I really don't see the need to register. I initially considered it to get the completion coupon, but Babies R Us sends me coupons so often that I'll just use those. I don't need much this time around so we'll just get what we really need.
My best girlfriends are insisting on a "sprinkle", which I'm ok with since it will just be 6 of us total.
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It's who you tell and what your expectations of that registry are that become debatable.
Some register just to get a completion discount.
Other's register fully expecting people to shower them with as many gifts as they received for their first child.
I think a lot of this expectation depends on the area of the country. Apparently second showers are totally normal in some parts of the country.
I was offered a 2nd shower and declined. I think they're incredibly gift grabby.
There are plenty of other ways to celebrate a second child that are not a party where the primary focus of the event is the expectation of being "showered" with gifts when you should already have the majority of baby gear already from the first child.
Our IF journey: 1 m/c, 1 IVF with only 3 eggs retrieved yielding Dylan and a lost twin, 1 shocker unmedicated BFP resulting in Jace, 3 more unmedicated pregnancies ending in more losses.
Total score: 6 pregnancies, 5 losses, 2 amazing blessings that I'm thankful for every single day.
No. I got flooded with gifts for my first baby. Nobody seemed to care about the second and around here, a second shower is in poor form so I did not register. I can see registering and keeping it a secret for the completion coupon though.
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See I hesitate to do it, because it feels weird to me, I likely wont if it's a girl again. If it's a boy, I may consider it. I've already know of 2 showers that I may have, and THAT seems overkill for me, frankly I dont need a lot of anything. But it's way early, so I have time to decide
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my family wouldn't do it for the same gender,, although some down in these parts (down south ) do it for every baby no matter the gender.
I am getitng 1 or 2 small showers and really my friends know not to get me much. We don't need much at all, but clothes. Clothes are what people like to get for girls anyway...
I registered for like 10 items, but people ask me if I registered and I just say I did, but I really don't expect ppl to get me anything (or anything on the registry).
It's really about the party - it's at a cute place and will be fun and we will spend more per person than the gift to be honest.
No, I won't be registering for baby #2. I think it's more common in some areas or among some families and I think that's great but it would be frowned upon in my family/circle of friends.
Clomid M/C 8 weeks 2/08 *IVF #1-DD born 3/09
*Surprise BFP-T18 baby lost at 13w 1/10 *FET #1-DS born 2/11
I haven't decided about registering yet, BTW, but I'm leaning against it unless it seems that people are planning on buying us anything. I'm not expecting anything, esp. if it's another girl.
Pregnant with #1 with PCOS and LPD, success with mostly naturopathic treatments
Our Thanksgiving Day baby 11/22/07
Pregnant with #2 with LPD, uterine polyp/hysteroscopy, DOR (AMH = 0.17), 2 c/ps
Our early Christmas present 12/9/10
I definitely won't. I don't need anything (other than clothes if it's a girl) so I don't even care about the completion coupon. I don't really have money to spend on anything full price, I garage sale a lot of things and get hand me downs from family.
I had friends who offered to throw me a small shower (from church) for the baby we were going to adopt in May after she was born. I felt ok about it because it was a different gender, none of them went to shower for Bright (I didn't know them then since we were new to the area) and I told them I only wanted small gifts, nothing too much.
Married on 3.20.2004. It took 30 month, 2 failed adoptions and IVF for our first miracle. We have had 9 foster kids since he was born and started the domestic adoption process when he was 10 month old, we had 4 failed matches in that time. After our daughter was born we brought her home and spent 2 weeks fearing we might lose her because of complications that came up. But Praise God all went through and she is ours forever! Expecting again after IVF
I did not. The babies are going to be 12-13 months apart and did not see the need.
Everything we have is gender neutral, except the clothes. But, I have enough gender neutral stuff for the first few weeks. And then i guess Christmas is right around the corner LOL
I am not a fan of second showers when the children are really close together. I have a cousin who had a large shower for each of her kids - and each kid is less than 18 months apart. So, when the 3rd was born, she had 3 under 3. I thought that was very gift grabby.
Plus, in her case, her first was girl, and registered for all girl things. So, her "reasoning" for the second shower is that she "had all girl stuff" not really my problem KWIM?
I think a small "sprinkle" is OK, where it is a few people, and it is either no gifts, or very small things
Plus, in her case, her first was girl, and registered for all girl things. So, her "reasoning" for the second shower is that she "had all girl stuff" not really my problem KWIM?
LOL -- so true!
Fortunately we have a GN nursery and all GN gear, just a ton of girl clothes. A friend of mine had a girl first and boy second (3+ years later) so close friends threw her an all-clothes shower for her second. I don't really want that either if this is a boy, but I at least see the reasoning.
Pregnant with #1 with PCOS and LPD, success with mostly naturopathic treatments
Our Thanksgiving Day baby 11/22/07
Pregnant with #2 with LPD, uterine polyp/hysteroscopy, DOR (AMH = 0.17), 2 c/ps
Our early Christmas present 12/9/10
I won't. I'm having a boy and have a lot of girl stuff. I also sold a lot of stuff thinking we weren't going to have anymore kids. But I'm really not fussed about people giving us stuff-- I'm happy to get it ourselves.
If anything, I'd rather people bring us a meal after he comes or stick a
little money in a card for his savings account.
When people I know have (and send out) massive registry lists for second and third babies, I do judge a little. I don't mind giving a present for second and subsequent babies, especially when there's a big age gap, but I tend to think low-key is better.
I did for the discount and to keep track of what I need to get. I've been getting so many 20% coupons lately though, I'm just using those every week to get stuff I need (bedding, decor, high chair, double stroller...) I don't have any shower expectation.
No, I don't really need much. We just needed some additional furniture for the new baby, a double stroller, and a few odds and ends.
I have heard that sometimes with a second baby someone will throw a shower where everyone just brings a book, or just brings some sort of pampering gift for the mommy (bubble bath, etc), Those sound kind of fun but no one offered and I certainly wasn't going to suggest it, lol.
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June24Bride
member
Re: Registering for baby #2 ?
I decided against it since my LO's are only a year apart...and they are both girls. I made it clear I don't want any showers this time either so I really don't see the need to register. I initially considered it to get the completion coupon, but Babies R Us sends me coupons so often that I'll just use those. I don't need much this time around so we'll just get what we really need.
My best girlfriends are insisting on a "sprinkle", which I'm ok with since it will just be 6 of us total.
I think registering in and of itself is harmless.
It's who you tell and what your expectations of that registry are that become debatable.
Some register just to get a completion discount.
Other's register fully expecting people to shower them with as many gifts as they received for their first child.
I think a lot of this expectation depends on the area of the country. Apparently second showers are totally normal in some parts of the country.
I was offered a 2nd shower and declined. I think they're incredibly gift grabby.
There are plenty of other ways to celebrate a second child that are not a party where the primary focus of the event is the expectation of being "showered" with gifts when you should already have the majority of baby gear already from the first child.
Total score: 6 pregnancies, 5 losses, 2 amazing blessings that I'm thankful for every single day.
I see you are from Washington too. Where are you located?
South Sound
my family wouldn't do it for the same gender,, although some down in these parts (down south ) do it for every baby no matter the gender.
I am getitng 1 or 2 small showers and really my friends know not to get me much. We don't need much at all, but clothes. Clothes are what people like to get for girls anyway...
I registered for like 10 items, but people ask me if I registered and I just say I did, but I really don't expect ppl to get me anything (or anything on the registry).
It's really about the party - it's at a cute place and will be fun and we will spend more per person than the gift to be honest.
Clomid M/C 8 weeks 2/08 *IVF #1-DD born 3/09
*Surprise BFP-T18 baby lost at 13w 1/10 *FET #1-DS born 2/11
OMG, 2660! THAT'S AWESOME!!!
I haven't decided about registering yet, BTW, but I'm leaning against it unless it seems that people are planning on buying us anything. I'm not expecting anything, esp. if it's another girl.
Our Thanksgiving Day baby 11/22/07
Pregnant with #2 with LPD, uterine polyp/hysteroscopy, DOR (AMH = 0.17), 2 c/ps
Our early Christmas present 12/9/10
I definitely won't. I don't need anything (other than clothes if it's a girl) so I don't even care about the completion coupon. I don't really have money to spend on anything full price, I garage sale a lot of things and get hand me downs from family.
I had friends who offered to throw me a small shower (from church) for the baby we were going to adopt in May after she was born. I felt ok about it because it was a different gender, none of them went to shower for Bright (I didn't know them then since we were new to the area) and I told them I only wanted small gifts, nothing too much.
I did not. The babies are going to be 12-13 months apart and did not see the need.
Everything we have is gender neutral, except the clothes. But, I have enough gender neutral stuff for the first few weeks. And then i guess Christmas is right around the corner LOL
I am not a fan of second showers when the children are really close together. I have a cousin who had a large shower for each of her kids - and each kid is less than 18 months apart. So, when the 3rd was born, she had 3 under 3. I thought that was very gift grabby.
Plus, in her case, her first was girl, and registered for all girl things. So, her "reasoning" for the second shower is that she "had all girl stuff" not really my problem KWIM?
I think a small "sprinkle" is OK, where it is a few people, and it is either no gifts, or very small things
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LOL -- so true!
Fortunately we have a GN nursery and all GN gear, just a ton of girl clothes. A friend of mine had a girl first and boy second (3+ years later) so close friends threw her an all-clothes shower for her second. I don't really want that either if this is a boy, but I at least see the reasoning.
Our Thanksgiving Day baby 11/22/07
Pregnant with #2 with LPD, uterine polyp/hysteroscopy, DOR (AMH = 0.17), 2 c/ps
Our early Christmas present 12/9/10
I won't. I'm having a boy and have a lot of girl stuff. I also sold a lot of stuff thinking we weren't going to have anymore kids. But I'm really not fussed about people giving us stuff-- I'm happy to get it ourselves.
If anything, I'd rather people bring us a meal after he comes or stick a little money in a card for his savings account.When people I know have (and send out) massive registry lists for second and third babies, I do judge a little. I don't mind giving a present for second and subsequent babies, especially when there's a big age gap, but I tend to think low-key is better.
TTC#2=July 2011: Surprise BFP: Chemical Pregnancy
No, I don't really need much. We just needed some additional furniture for the new baby, a double stroller, and a few odds and ends.
I have heard that sometimes with a second baby someone will throw a shower where everyone just brings a book, or just brings some sort of pampering gift for the mommy (bubble bath, etc), Those sound kind of fun but no one offered and I certainly wasn't going to suggest it, lol.
they still arent thrilled about the number. ( because it was over a span of 5 days ) they are not easy to please
but thank you for your support!