March 2011 Moms

To tell or not to tell...

Are you ladies telling people or waiting a bit?  If you are telling, who are you telling?  Why or why not?

 DH and I agreed not to tell until baby is well-established in there.  However, I don't think I'm going to make it.  I've already told my two best friends and I can't go much more without telling my folks... 

(I totally think this is a decision that there is no right/wrong...just what's best for you, but I'm curious if anyone wants to share...Happy Monday!)

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Re: To tell or not to tell...

  • The only person that knows (other than DH) is my best friend, who is also my work buddy. It is so nice to have someone that knows at work.

     We are planning to wait to tell our parents until after my first appt (on July 16th.) I should be 7-8 weeks by then, and we are hoping to make it to 12 weeks before telling "the world."

    It is so hard to keep it a secret from my mom though. I already have this strange sense that she knows everything and that I'm not doing a very good job of hiding it.

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  • I managed to hold out a total of 4 days. We told our parents within 48 hours and then started telling close friends a couple of days later. The whole world probably knows by now. I always thought I wanted to wait until my first visit with my midwife, but that went out the window as soon as I got a BFP. Part of me wishes we'd kept our mouthes shut, oh well. I'm praying this is a sticky baby and it doesn't matter how early we blabbed.
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  • The day we got the BFP we told our families and BFFs. We aren't secret keepers, and if something happens we want our loved ones' support. We aren't telling the "world" (work, Facebook, students, etc) until after the first trimester. Well, at least that's the plan. I'm small, so I may be showing some when school starts (i'll be at 11 weeks, about), so we may have to tell then.
  • With DS we told our families right away. It was the first grandbaby on either side and we had been trying for a long time.

    With this one we are waiting until we at least hear a heart beat to tell the grandparents and until about 12 weeks to tell everyone else. 

    I might tell my best friend before then though, I am not sure. 

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  • Eeek, this is all so exciting! I always thought I would want to wait to tell ANYONE (besides DH, of course), but I'm pretty sure when the time comes, we'll tell our parents right away, work/friends probably when I hit 6-8 weeks, and then "facebook announce it" at 12 weeks-ish?
    Jimmie, mama to Zoey (March 2011)
    Losses 5/13, 8/13, and 3/14. 
    Expecting another GIRL! Carter Grace due on 12/25.

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  • We are waiting to tell anyone until after my first appointment August 3rd. I don't have a problem  keeping secrets though! I kind of like this little secret being between DH and I for now. Good luck keeping it in until you have decided not to!
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  • My best friend knows, but we are waiting until after we hear the heartbeat to tell everyone else! Its a though call though because it would be nice to have support from friends and family if we do indeed have a miscarriage or something goes wrong.
  • Other than DH, there are 2 women at work that know, this is only b/c I'm the one that takes x-rays and need to have someone else do it from now on. We'll likely wait to tell our immediate family until after our u/s, scheduled July 15th. Then wait till after 1st tri to tell friends and other family. With having 2 previous m/c's I'm very nervous about telling anyone.
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  • The only person who knows besides DH is my close work friend. I needed someone to talk to b/c we are trying at the same time and although we weren't "officially" trying this month it happened that we had sex t ovulation. So I was excited and needed someone to talk to and then she asked if I had taken a test, I had to tell her. We haven't told anyone else and I don't plan to until the end of July or sometime in August. It will be a challenge this weekend because we are going to visit my parents. I did have friends come and stay this past weekend and it was easier than I thought it would be to not tell them. 
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  • I'm too excited to completely keep it a secret like I always thought I would. Our parents, my closest cousin, 1 close co-worker, and close friend know. They knew we were TTC and know me very well. They ask me all the time if I'm pg yet and this time I couldn't say no with a straight face! Sooo busted! DH is NOT telling his friends. If I were to mc, we are happy that people in our support system know.
  • We're planning to tell our parents after our first appointment at 6 weeks and then everyone else after the first trimester. We may wait until even later to tell most of our friends and extended family because we're going back to the US (we live out of the country) for a wedding in October. It would be a fun surprise if we can hold out. 
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  • If all goes well today at the doctor, we will probably start telling family and close friends.  We are not big secret keepers and would want their support if a m/c happened.  Plus I am supposed to be going out this weekend with my gal pals so they will immediately know once I decline to drink any alcohol.  I will wait to announce on facebook until I hear the baby's heartbeat...then of course the whole world will know!

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  • Ive told several of my friends already. Other than that its still secret. Ihavent announced on facebook and Im not telling family until I start showing. ;)
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  • Two of my friends know and that's it.  One I told because it turns out we are two weeks apart and both with our first!  No way I am telling my worry wart mom because we're taking a vacation before she can find out.  At first we thought it would be a grandparent's day surprise, both sides will be first time grandparents, but that's too far away.  Then we thought my mom's 60th birthday in August.  But now maybe we'll tell parents after 1st appointment mid July around my 30th birthday.  Then I'll tell school right before going back and everyone else then too.

     
  • The rule for myself was:

    If it is someone I would want to know I was going through a MC I told them right away.

    I am wanting to tell work though, some people are asking actually.

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  • DH and the ladies on this site are the only ones who know. I will tell everyone else after seeing a strong heartbeat. We decided to do this because the first time we got a BFP we told everyone and it was so much harder to let everyone know about the MC. It hurt my family a lot and I don't want them to have to go through that again, especially my younger brother and sister. It would just be better if no one knows for now.
    Married 11/08/08 TTC since 2009 MC 3/22/10 at 9w4d MC 7/20/10 at 6w5d Homeowners since 2/24/11 BFP Father's Day 6/19/11 Pregnancy Ticker Psalm 139:13,15-16 You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb... You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.
  • imageStina4242:

    The rule for myself was:

    If it is someone I would want to know I was going through a MC I told them right away.

    I am wanting to tell work though, some people are asking actually.

     

    I really like how you put that...I have told my two best friends because they are the ones that would be my shoulders to cry on if anything went wrong. 

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  • We are going on vacation, part of which will be spent w/ H's entire extended family.  They will notice something is up when I don't drink wine or beer with them.  Because of this, we're telling my parents, sister and aunt the night before we leave, and then we'll tell the ILs in person about 4 days later. 

     

    We're holding off any telling anyone else until after my first dr appointment.  We'll tell our friends in person, or on the phone if they are in a different town.  We'll never officially announce on FB - it's just not my style.

     

    I'll wait as long as I can to tell work. 

    Baby Boy Born 3.15.11. 8lb 9oz, 21.75in. 6 month stats: 20lb 11oz (92%tile), 30.12in.(100%tile - who knew it went over 99th? Which means 100% of other 6 month olds are shorter than mine!)
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