We have an awful lot of projects that need to get done around the house. They range from replacing exterior doors, painting our porch, cleaning the basement, etc. DH is very handy and so most of our projects are DIY. Most of these are projects that DH needs to work on since I'm not handy at all.
The problem I'm having is that after tending to my girls all day during the week, I have a hard time with DH "disappearing" to go do these projects on the weekends. I understand that he's doing work around the house so I don't get mad at him or anything. But I know I slow him down when I ask him to only work on the projects one day over the weekend or to take care of the girls in the morning and then go do the projects in the afternoon. It's a double-edged sword because I'm sick of projects either not getting done at all or taking so long to complete. I'm also having a hard time with the idea that all the work that I do: laundry, dishes, grocery shopping, keeping toys and junk picked up, vaccuming, etc, I have to do with the kids at my heels (or on my hip). While DH gets to go off and work on stuff on his own.
So how does your family handle stuff like this? Is this a common issue among families? Do I just need to suck it up and leave him alone to take care of the projects?
Re: How do you get the "bigger" house projects completed?
Maybe you could take a weekend day and plan to have DH work on the projects he can do for a certain amount of time while you take care of the girls and then you get equal time to work on a project that you can do while he takes care of the girls?
Or just send the kids to the grandparents, if available, or somewhere else and work on the project together?
We hire people. DH is very handy, but his weekends are his "relax" time with the family. To us, it's well worth the money spent. It's a lifestyle issue for us.
If it's a financial issue for you guys and that's why your DH is doing everything himself, then maybe he can just do stuff on one of the weekend days and leave the other free to hang out with family?
OR, can you hire a babysitter so you get a break too? Or even trade babysitting with another mom?
Double edge sword is RIGHT! best way to describe it.
We just laid hard wood flooring in three rooms over the last month- it totally sucked. I would watch DD all week- DH would come home work on the flooring- and then spend all weekend working on the flooring. So therefore i never got a break- and he never got to see her.
there is really no easy answer.
its either pay someone to come in and do it-
or have a family come over to give you a break from the kiddos so you can run errands in peace or catch a breather.
Ya have to look at it this way- there is an end is sight- and you get a good finished product (hopefully) ~
hang in there.
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Noel - August 2010
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I'm with Harriet - we often just pay people to do it for us. My husband works a lot of hrs including some weekends so it's impossible to get stuff done around here.
I would find someone to be a "mothers helper" for a few hrs or just pay a contractor. You can often find handy men who do odd jobs for a small price.