UGH! DS is back to asking me for "mommy milk"

butterbeansmama

well, he actually calls it the baby's milk, but he has asked me over the past two days, if he can drink some of the baby's milk. When I say no, he then says, "just one" (I assume meaning just one boob), or "maybe a different day?". UGH! I thought we were over this. I just keep telling him, "no" and that it's only for babies and that he had that kind of milk when he was a baby and then I list all the things that he CAN eat and the baby CAN'T, but it doesn't seem to do much good. He is very serious about it.

Brideofranken

let him try it- I bet he won't like it, or care to continue- I told J that she could try baby milk out of a boob if she really wanted to, and she ALMOST did- then laughed and said, nooooooooo- that IS for babies! I'll drink milk in  a cup!

butterbeansmama

Brideofranken:

let him try it- I bet he won't like it, or care to continue- I told J that she could try baby milk out of a boob if she really wanted to, and she ALMOST did- then laughed and said, nooooooooo- that IS for babies! I'll drink milk in  a cup!

I know he would definitely do it, if I let him. That is what I'm scared of.

Temp970088312507122

I remember you having this problem when your baby was first born. Did you try letting him nurse? When DD asked, I said go ahead, and she just put her mouth on the top of my boob, for about 10 seconds. She'll still do it on occassion but it's not really a big deal, she never goes for nipple!

butterbeansmama

bellabeck:

I remember you having this problem when your baby was first born. Did you try letting him nurse? When DD asked, I said go ahead, and she just put her mouth on the top of my boob, for about 10 seconds. She'll still do it on occassion but it's not really a big deal, she never goes for nipple!

No, he mentioned it for a couple of days and then it was forgotten. Maybe because I've been more "open" to nursing in front of him that he has started to ask again. IDK

goodheartedmommy

He's not going to be able to latch on, so one try and he'll realize it's not going to happen. Of course, he's almost 4, right? Either way, no should mean no, so just keep telling him no, but he's free to have milk in a cup. Is he really curious, or just jealous? I'd probably snuggle him while drinking a cup of milk if it's jealousy.

butterbeansmama

goodheartedmommy:

He's not going to be able to latch on, so one try and he'll realize it's not going to happen. Of course, he's almost 4, right? Either way, no should mean no, so just keep telling him no, but he's free to have milk in a cup. Is he really curious, or just jealous? I'd probably snuggle him while drinking a cup of milk if it's jealousy.

Ya, he is almost 4 and that is how I feel, no should mean no. I'm not sure if it's curiousity or jealousy. He doesn't even ask "while" I'm nursing, it's always at random times. Like tonight when I was singing to him before bed, he stuck his hand down my shirt and said he was tickling me. Then he noticed my boob and asked about having "baby's milk". The other time, it was while we were changing after swim lessons.

Temp970088312507122

butterbeansmama:

No, he mentioned it for a couple of days and then it was forgotten. Maybe because I've been more "open" to nursing in front of him that he has started to ask again. IDK

IDK, maybe try just offering the top of your boob (even while the baby is nursing, that's usually when DD strikes!) and see if that satisfies his curiousity? DD just presses her mouth against it and that's it - it's not like she tries to suck or anything. Can you offer him a big boy treat when he asks, something the baby can't have? If he's overly persistent, maybe just put a receiving blanket or nursing cover over you.

I bet he's just jealous of the closeness that comes with nursing. I always try to give DD1 attention while DD2 is nursing. I'll read her a book, watch tv with her or we'll just cuddle and talk, so that way she's not left out.

Brideofranken

bellabeck:

butterbeansmama:

No, he mentioned it for a couple of days and then it was forgotten. Maybe because I've been more "open" to nursing in front of him that he has started to ask again. IDK

IDK, maybe try just offering the top of your boob (even while the baby is nursing, that's usually when DD strikes!) and see if that satisfies his curiousity? DD just presses her mouth against it and that's it - it's not like she tries to suck or anything. Can you offer him a big boy treat when he asks, something the baby can't have? If he's overly persistent, maybe just put a receiving blanket or nursing cover over you.

I bet he's just jealous of the closeness that comes with nursing. I always try to give DD1 attention while DD2 is nursing. I'll read her a book, watch tv with her or we'll just cuddle and talk, so that way she's not left out.

this sounds like a good plan. I was nursing J when I was still pg. with W so I thought she'd want to start up again- but she never did (yay)

MelandJeff

I wouldnt do it. Boundaries need to be set, and the answer "no" should not have to be explained each and every time you say it.

"No, P, you can not have breast milk" Period.

AggieCouple

Maybe you could take him shopping to pick out a special cup?  I think he probably does feel left out and that the baby gets something special that he does not, which seems normal to me.  I do think one needs to be sensitive to these sort of feelings when there is a new baby. Since the baby gets her special boobs, perhaps a special cup(s) will make him feel like it's fair?  H was always very good about stepping in and doing stuff for just "Daddy and ML" when TB was first born, and saying things like "Only *you* get to get to do this because you're not a baby."  I know, a bit overdone, but it made her feel that she was special too.

Brideofranken

AggieCouple:

Maybe you could take him shopping to pick out a special cup?  I think he probably does feel left out and that the baby gets something special that he does not, which seems normal to me.  I do think one needs to be sensitive to these sort of feelings when there is a new baby. Since the baby gets her special boobs, perhaps a special cup(s) will make him feel like it's fair?  H was always very good about stepping in and doing stuff for just "Daddy and ML" when TB was first born, and saying things like "Only *you* get to get to do this because you're not a baby."  I know, a bit overdone, but it made her feel that she was special too.

yeah, I think mel is a little harsh up there- but what else is new?!

I did tell the baby  (for J's benefit- naturally the newborn couldn't understand or giveashit what I was talking about)

that he couldn't have things all the time...like I'd give J a cookie, and say, no, W- cookies are for big girls only! Not for babies, all babies get is milk. maybe when you're big, you can have a cookie...

stuff like that...

 

JenniC1135

When the twins wanted to try it, I let them taste it in a cup. They quickly declared it "yucky" and had no further interest. In fact, Alex wouldn't drink anything with milk for a few days because he thought it was mommy milk and wouldn't taste good.

ilovemygirls

MelandJeff:

I wouldnt do it. Boundaries need to be set, and the answer "no" should not have to be explained each and every time you say it.

"No, P, you can not have breast milk" Period.

This exactly.  It's sounds like it's more "your" issue.  You probably feel guilty about the baby getting a lot of attn, etc.  But it is what it is.  Tell him no & move on.  He had his time at the boob, now the baby does.  It's all equal, really!