Does Anyone Else Feel Like They Have a Really Difficult Baby?

MamatoJackson

I didn't always feel this way but lately I'm getting to the point where I feel like (and am being told that) I have a really difficult baby.

I worry about things like - Is he going to grow up to be an emotionally disturbed adult?  You always hear people say, "He's always been like that! Since he was a baby!"  Well, if my kid stays this way into his adult years, I don't think he's going to have any friends.

I love him to pieces... but I'm his Mom.  And sometimes it's hard to like him, though I always, always love him.

Is anyone else feeling this way or am I just a horrible person? 

Krisx2

Cora's difficult at times. But having a feisty temperament  when young can lead to good problem solving skills and independence during toddler hood according to some child psychologists. 

Just take it one day at a time and enjoy the good moments. 

vmm0016

Krisx2:

Cora's difficult at times. But having a feisty temperament  when young can lead to good problem solving skills and independence during toddler hood according to some child psychologists. 

Just take it one day at a time and enjoy the good moments. 

This is our girl to a tee.  I love her to death but she does try my patience sometimes.  Every time she giggles at me and looks at me like I am the coolest and funniest person in the world makes up for all her fussiness!

maryverrecchia

What does he do that makes you think he is particularly difficult? If he just requires a lot of attention, i just chock that up to he is easily bored and needs more frequent stimulation. (My stepmother says that Lil Guy is just too smart and needs more stimulation-LOL)

Temp785382312506150

I felt the same way for the first 3.5 months. DD did eventually start getting easier.

mom2binKC

Not so much this time -- DS is by no means "easygoing" like some babies I see, and he can scream so loud that people in the grocery store literally ask me what's wrong with him.  But he is nothing compared to DD.  She was definitely a challege.  Nothing seemed to keep her happy.  I felt like I held her for most of her first year.  She hardly smiled until she was closer to 6 months old.  I remember asking the pedi if she should be happier, because she seemed so discontented all the time.  Not only was she often unhappy, but she could SCREAM.  I was often embarrassed to have her out in public.  And it made me cry when friends would talk about their "easy" babies who smiled all the time and hardly ever cried.  (DH and I would tell ourselves that other people's babies must not be as smart as ours, just to make ourselves feel better!)

She was tough, but once we hit a year, things improved dramatically.  And once we hit two and she started really talking, things got even better.  She's precocious, loving, and never stops moving!  I definitely think the challenges we saw early on (almost from the very beginning) were an indication of her little personality.  She's still very dramatic and a bit high-needs.  But she is so worth all the effort!  She is well-liked by her friends at preschool, she is social, and she is STILL very independent.

I recommend reading a book called "The Fussy Baby Book: Parenting Your High-Need Child From Birth to Age Five" by Dr. William Sears.  Even if your LO turns out to be really easygoing later, this book was helpful for understanding that different babies have different needs, but parenting a high-needs child can be very rewarding!  Hang in there, mama!

LoriSTi

Around 3 Months I would say Marcus was a very difficult baby. Now at 5.5 months he is so much better. Not the easiest baby in the world but so so much better than 2 months ago. Hang in there it will get better.

MamatoJackson

mom2binKC:

Not so much this time -- DS is by no means "easygoing" like some babies I see, and he can scream so loud that people in the grocery store literally ask me what's wrong with him.  But he is nothing compared to DD.  She was definitely a challege.  Nothing seemed to keep her happy.  I felt like I held her for most of her first year.  She hardly smiled until she was closer to 6 months old.  I remember asking the pedi if she should be happier, because she seemed so discontented all the time.  Not only was she often unhappy, but she could SCREAM.  I was often embarrassed to have her out in public.  And it made me cry when friends would talk about their "easy" babies who smiled all the time and hardly ever cried.  (DH and I would tell ourselves that other people's babies must not be as smart as ours, just to make ourselves feel better!)

She was tough, but once we hit a year, things improved dramatically.  And once we hit two and she started really talking, things got even better.  She's precocious, loving, and never stops moving!  I definitely think the challenges we saw early on (almost from the very beginning) were an indication of her little personality.  She's still very dramatic and a bit high-needs.  But she is so worth all the effort!  She is well-liked by her friends at preschool, she is social, and she is STILL very independent.

I recommend reading a book called "The Fussy Baby Book: Parenting Your High-Need Child From Birth to Age Five" by Dr. William Sears.  Even if your LO turns out to be really easygoing later, this book was helpful for understanding that different babies have different needs, but parenting a high-needs child can be very rewarding!  Hang in there, mama!

Thank you so much for this!! 

Summer20

If it makes you feel any better, I was a horrible, colicky baby and I have lots of friends now. 

Seriously though, I wasn't especially difficult as an older child.  I was stubborn and very independent as a pp said, but I outgrew the worst of it.  As an adult I'm often told that I'm pretty easy going about a lot of things!  So even though you have to put up with him now, don't worry about him in the future.  I'm sure lots of people will love your DS, he's a cutie pie!

 

MrsRebecca

You are NOT a horrible person. And anyone who says that you are needs a smack upside the head.  It's hard to be with a difficult/needy baby 24/7.

I have spent a lot of time sitting in Jack's room crying while he sleeps and whispering how much I love him. Once he's finally calmed down I feel incredibly guilty for wishing that he would just STOP crying.

Hang in there mama!

MamatoJackson

MrsRebecca:

You are NOT a horrible person. And anyone who says that you are needs a smack upside the head.  It's hard to be with a difficult/needy baby 24/7.

I have spent a lot of time sitting in Jack's room crying while he sleeps and whispering how much I love him. Once he's finally calmed down I feel incredibly guilty for wishing that he would just STOP crying.

Hang in there mama!

I do the same thing... I feel awful afterwards.  

Thanks for posting this.