Infertility

Mrs. Negative Pants

Hiii....need to blab to those who may understand.

 

I had my first IUI on Wednesday, and am now in the 2 ww.  I was super duper positive when I left the RE, but since then I am becoming more and more negative about all of this.  I had one 30 mm follicle and my RE injected a post wash of 15 million. The numbers aren't great, but they aren't horrible by any means. 

I know its obviously too early to feel anything, but I just have a hunch that this won't be it for me.  Do any of you feel this way so early on-feeling negative before you actually get your BFN?? I'm just so down in the dumps. 

I am not sure if its because I have been really busy and running around, and haven't had much time to relax.  But I need to get out of this funk and start thinking positive! Thanks for letting me vent...BLAH!


Diagnosed PCOS & MFI-Success with IUI
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Re: Mrs. Negative Pants

  • Oh I understand.  I'm so jaded at this point that I'm afraid to be excited about my IVF!
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  • Oh, I've already started thinking about what our next step will be, and I'm only 4dpiui. I totally understand what you're saying. I try not to be Negative Nancy, but I just think that the first 3 IUI's didn't work for me... why would this one?
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  • I feel the exact same way. this 2ww is never-ending and i'm so negative about it. i think i was WAY too optimistic that this was the cycle for us right away, but now i've done a complete 180. i need to snap out of it.
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  • may2806may2806 member
    I'm sorry, it's total normal to feel like that though. I think it's a defense mechanism. ((HUGS))
    Dx: High FSH, stage IV endo, homozygous C677T MTHFR and PAI-1
    Early loss 10/08
    Lap 1/09
    IVF #1 "natural IVF" - 1 egg retrieved, missed m/c
    Tried several mini-stim cycles with no response
    Switched clinics - dx'd as carrier for Fragile X
    IVF #2 MDL protocol Jan/Feb converted to IUI, BFN
    IVF #2 take 2: Antagonist, one embie, BFN
    IVF #3: Antagonist, no fertilization
    One last ditch effort at OE IVF (antagonist with Clomid) cancelled
    DE cycle #1 Jan/Feb 2011, BFP, ectopic
    DE cycle #2 June/July 2011 - BFP
    10/28/11 Baby girl lost at 17 weeks due to pre-term labor. We love and miss you.
    DE cycle #3 June/July 2012 - BFP, twins, both heartbeats stopped, D&C
    2 frosties but don't know what's next
    FET Dec 2012: BFP! Praying this one sticks for the long haul!
  • I totally understand where you are coming from. I am only 1dpiui right now and I just go back and forth. One minute I'm positive and the next I'm questioning it.

    The 2ww is torturous! I wish it was a 2 hour wait haha!

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  • i totally understand!!! you are describing me! after 3 years of TTC, how can i be positive?!
    Adopting after multiple rounds of fertility meds and 3 failed IUI's
  • You're not the only one.  Its hard to be positive after all of this.  We are heading into are 3rd IUI (with injectables) this time and I am not optimistic.  The RE has recommended IVF however for financial reasons we are trying IUI AGAIN.  I am even pessimistic about IVF.  Spending all that money and nothing.  It's hard staying positive but try to keep yourself busy.  Wishing you your BFP!!
  • Try to hang in there! I broke my 2ww down to 1ww's. I didnt even consider begin pregnant until after I got my progesterone check that proved I did ovulate. Then and only then did I start to feel positive about that cycle. Up until my "implantation" bleeding lasted for 5 days. Then I was a debbie downer and freaking out. We are on a break this month but I am already not very hopeful for IUI #2. I've been researching IVF all day Embarrassed
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  • I started crying this morning to DH because I feel like we have wasted $600 just to get another BFN, I am only 8dpiui!  I cried all day because I was feeling so negative.  I have the mindset that it was a BFN for 15 cycles, why would it change now.  Then my mom reminds me the is "advance sex" so it changes everything. Now I am starting to think maybe there is a chance again.  I hate the 2ww rollercoster.   GL to you, I hope we all get our BFP soon!
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