Deployment Motto? — The Bump
Military Families

Deployment Motto?

Hi ladies.
Do you have a deployment motto? Something that just summed it up for you or got you through?

My sum-up was "Deployments never get easier, they just get old." Every new day sucked just as much as the one before it, sometimes even more. I don't think I ever got to the point that I found an inspirational motto to get me through. When he was gone my siggy said "I love him like breathing and without him here I'm holding my breath."

How about you?

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Re: Deployment Motto?

  • I didn't have one.  I love him and I missed him, but I had a life to keep living.
    Twin boys due 7/25/12
  • I just can't let myself think like that. And I really don't feel like every new day sucks. It's one day closer to him coming home. So, no motto really, but just more of a goal to remain positive, keep myself busy, and offer him as much support as I can. Some days are sucky, but I just let myself have a short-lived pity party and then go about my day.
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  • I'm astounded at your ability to survive that long without oxygen.
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  • image Amy_Justin:
    I'm astounded at your ability to survive that long without oxygen.

    /dead

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  • No motto but I love reading this poem by e e cummings

    i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
    my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
    i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
    by only me is your doing,my darling)
    i fear
    no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
    no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
    and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
    and whatever a sun will always sing is you

    here is the deepest secret nobody knows
    (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
    and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
    higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
    and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

    i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

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  • I don't have a motto. I think it sucks, but I know we'll make it through and go from there. I try to not even count the days, but if I'm going to do a countdown I go by pay periods to make it seem a little better. Even then, that's saved for times when my BGP are in the washer and I'm throwing a tiny pity party for myself.

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  • image ames17:
    I just can't let myself think like that. And I really don't feel like every new day sucks. It's one day closer to him coming home. So, no motto really, but just more of a goal to remain positive, keep myself busy, and offer him as much support as I can. Some days are sucky, but I just let myself have a short-lived pity party and then go about my day.

    This. Yes

    I missed my husband every second of every day but instead of dwelling on that I used the time that he was gone to better myself and accomplish new things. So I guess my motto was just to keep going and stay positive.

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  • image PrincessJesci:

    "I love him like breathing and without him here I'm holding my breath."

    Ironically, this actually comes across as not loving him since you are not breathing.  High school English: If breathe is to love, to suffocate is to ___.

    Twin boys due 7/25/12
  • image Erin2903:

    image ames17:
    I just can't let myself think like that. And I really don't feel like every new day sucks. It's one day closer to him coming home. So, no motto really, but just more of a goal to remain positive, keep myself busy, and offer him as much support as I can. Some days are sucky, but I just let myself have a short-lived pity party and then go about my day.

    This. Yes

    I missed my husband every second of every day but instead of dwelling on that I used the time that he was gone to better myself and accomplish new things. So I guess my motto was just to keep going and stay positive.

    Yes That reminded me of Dory in Finding Nemo ('just keep swimming"). In deployment you really just have to be positive and let your life continue.

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  • "It sucks worse for him!  Put down the friggin ice cream, get off your arse and do something productive."  That was once of my motivators.  I also looked up Bible quotes on strength when I needed a little more.
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  • image KatB12:

    No motto but I love reading this poem by e e cummings

    i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
    my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
    i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
    by only me is your doing,my darling)
    i fear
    no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
    no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
    and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
    and whatever a sun will always sing is you

    here is the deepest secret nobody knows
    (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
    and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
    higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
    and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

    i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

     Love this! It was part of our wedding vows even!

    To reply to OP, what helps me is to break the deployment down into more manageable chunks (so many garbage days, so many FRG meetings, etc..) rather than focusing on each day. Another thing I tell people a lot that I guess would be my "motto" is that as hard as being away from DH is, I feel so lucky to feel this pain and longing because it means I am fortunate enough to be that in love with someone. 

    And, I let myself have hard days without feeling guilty, but overall, I try to look at the positive and stay busy. Keep your head up, you'll find your strength. 

  •  Kristin- That is actually where I heard it for the first time( was in someone's wedding vows). That is so awesome, I am jealous wish I had found this poem like 5 years ago.

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  • As a PP said, I just remember that it sucks worse for him.  I also keep myself busy as much as possible and try not to dwell on the fact that he is gone.  I definitely don't count down the days unless there are only a couple of months left. 
  • image chantellio:
    As a PP said, I just remember that it sucks worse for him.  I also keep myself busy as much as possible and try not to dwell on the fact that he is gone.  I definitely don't count down the days unless there are only a couple of months left. 

    I pretty much do the same thing too. 

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    6/50
  • With the right attitude and the right resources, you can not only get through this, you can thrive through this!
  • Keep on truckin'. That and "Money money money moooooneyyyy!" (Kidding. Kind of ;])

    I took on the "Yesterday sucked. Today sucks. Tomorrow will suck, too." attitude during H's first deployment and I spent nearly everyday of the 7 months he was gone in bed. That's no way to live.

    Focusing on the bad and how much it blows will only make it worse.  

    5/100
    "So if you decide to date the guy from Applebees instead will your new SN be "mypearlshisapron?" Your new sig can be "putting the ho in nachos.""- DNBeach12
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  • image Killer Cupcake:

    Keep on truckin'. That and "Money money money moooooneyyyy!" (Kidding. Kind of ;])

    I took on the "Yesterday sucked. Today sucks. Tomorrow will suck, too." attitude during H's first deployment and I spent nearly everyday of the 7 months he was gone in bed. That's no way to live.

    Focusing on the bad and how much it blows will only make it worse.  

    Haha! Great line! I know this is what a lot of my coworkers say when they find out they get to deploy.

    I don't really have a motto... I guess when he deploys I am mostly thinking how nice it must be for him to deal with the "real" Air Force and not deal with BS.

  • I haven't sent my DH, but when my X was deployed, he was a fire fighter/truck driver, so I found a song from a musical that was "motivational" but light humored at the same time. It's from a musical "Working" and the song is about a trucker, but..

    "And I've got to roll, roll, roll brother trucker
    Sure enough a shame 'bout the shape I'm in
    Roll, roll, roll brother trucker
    I'm back on my wheels again
    Roll, roll, roll brother trucker
    Someone to love the truck driving man
    Roll, roll, roll brother trucker
    I'm back on my wheels again"

    instead of mottos, I just looked for things that made me laugh. I had stupid pictures of us EVERYWHERE. Otherwise, like PP have said.. dwelling on the bad and how long is left will make you crazy.

  • Before DH's first deployment he told me not to become a victim of my situation so I didn't.  That's gotten us both through 3 deployments as well as countless other life situations, he's a wise man. 
    Big Sisters 2/10 & 12/11
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  • image Mass-girl-at-heart:
    Before DH's first deployment he told me not to become a victim of my situation so I didn't.  That's gotten us both through 3 deployments as well as countless other life situations, he's a wise man. 

    YH sounds a lot like mine.  He isn't big into sitting around feeling sad or sorry about it.  He wants me busy, our family having fun and being happy and life to go on.

  • My deployment motto is "keep busy". Honestly, I just distract myself with whatever I can find. During DH's last deployment I finished my bachelors degree, learned how to line dance, took tennis lessons, joined step aerobics (so 1980s but so much fun!), went out with the girls, and worked a lot of overtime.

    If I think about it too much I will get into pity party mode. I only let myself lay around for the first week or so after he leaves and then it's "up and at 'em" again. I also gave myself a pity party around the holidays...those were some of the hardest for me.

  • This too shall pass. It's only for a short period of time (relative to our entire lives) and some days are hard, but each day that pass is one that we made it through and one closer to hugging him!
  • My Motto was

    "No News is Good News"

     

    and afterwards once the deployment was over, and looking back on it;

    "Be Strong, Keep your Chin Up, and Keep your ass busy" 

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  • image ~LittleOne~:

    My Motto was

    "No News is Good News"

     

    and afterwards once the deployment was over, and looking back on it;

    "Be Strong, Keep your Chin Up, and Keep your ass busy" 

    Yes

  • image MrsOjoButtons:
    image PrincessJesci:

    "I love him like breathing and without him here I'm holding my breath."

    Ironically, this actually comes across as not loving him since you are not breathing.  High school English: If breathe is to love, to suffocate is to ___.

    Oh that's an interesting analogy. Noone has ever put it to me like that. Obviously  not the intent of the quote but interesting anyway.

    Expect MIRACLES!! Shocking surprise BFP 9/12/12 After 2 IUIs, 3 IVFs w/ICSI and 1 FET we have been blessed with a healthy baby girl born 26 August 2010! Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic Pregnancy Ticker
  • Kristin 2t said " I feel so lucky to feel this pain and longing because it means I am fortunate enough to be that in love with someone. "

    Very nice. Yes I think I got to this point sometime during the first deployment.

    Expect MIRACLES!! Shocking surprise BFP 9/12/12 After 2 IUIs, 3 IVFs w/ICSI and 1 FET we have been blessed with a healthy baby girl born 26 August 2010! Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic Pregnancy Ticker
  • There's a song by Eddie Veder that fits very well with my attitude when my husband deploys. It's called "Long Nights" the line I identify most is this:

    "Have no fear, for when I'm alone I'll be better off than I was before."

  • I constantly told myself (and everyone else who loved to ask "how do you do it?") "God thinks I'm strong enough for this and I'm not going to doubt him now."  It helped alot and it usually stopped the stupid questions of others.
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    Currently going through our second deployment. Can't wait for Zoe to meet her daddy!

  • I actually find that deployments do get easier... the weeks before, 2 weeks after, and then the 2 weeks before he arrives home are the hardest. Otherwise, I just stay busy and make sure that I do things I enjoy. This is his job, and his life isn't stopping because he's gone... mine shouldn't either. The guys get annoyed with wives who don't know how to be on their own and become needy. I throw myself into my job, hobbies, seeing friends, planning fun things to do in the meantime.

    Not really a motto, but the thing DH and I say to each other is "I'll see you when I see you." We don't always know when, and it could change at any time, but we know it will come at some point. It helps me to remember that the timing and schedules are out of our control, and not to get too invested in his return schedule or planning our lives around it. Life goes on. Other than that, I just try to have a positive outlook, stay busy, and remind myself of what a fabulous husband I have. We just make sure to let each other know every time we "talk" (he's on a sub, so e-mails) that we love each other very much, even if the rest of the e-mail is something we're mad about : )

  • OP - Mottos aren't going to get you through. Getting out there and living your life will though! Stay busy and do things you enjoy, and make sure you're spending time with people who have positive outlooks or aren't military wives -- they'll remind you life happens outside of your husband's schedule : )
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