This is gonna get old. — The Bump
Military Families

This is gonna get old.

If, every time someone posts a comment, problem or concern about being married to a soldier, or something they don't like about military life, and the response they get is "Well, he's in the service and you should have been prepared for that." or "My DH is deployed so I don't get to do that with him." This board is going to get really old really fast. I'm just saying.
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Re: This is gonna get old.

  • That won't be the same response every time.

    Your post saying you've gone into his superior's office won't get a pat on the back from us.

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    6/50
  • I agree, I'm already getting a little put-off.  I like honesty, but jeez.  It's not like anyone has said my DH is getting deployed so I think I'll go screw a dozen ppl to make myself feel better.  Now that would be a flame-worthy post!
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  • Your post & run antics have gotten old, as well.

    If people don't want honest opinions, they shouldn't vent to strangers.  If they only want to vent, go buy a diary.  If they want rainbows and butterflies, go talk to a manicurist.

    Twin boys due 7/25/12
  • It goes beyond "He's in the service you should've been prepared" (which I agree with for the most part). It's life. It doesn't always go as planned and you don't always get to storm into your H's CO's office and demand things go your way. 
    5/100
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  • People weren't telling you to get over the fact that his leave was denied...people were telling you to get over YOURSELF.
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  • No, thats not the problem everyone has with your post. The problem they had with you is the first part, where you stated that you went to YH command and disrespected him, and his command by being a big titty baby, because they were going to scrap his leave. Just know that you arent always going to get your way, and embarassing YH is not the way to go about getting things done. You could hurt his carrer by doing that. MH is going to be on duty for my birthday, am I upest, yes a little, Am I going to storm into his BCs office and demand he gets off because I want to have a nice dinner out with him NO.

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  • I would have had the same response to your post if your husband had a civilian job. 
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  • I appreciate that you were the FRG leader. I'm a Key Spouse. I don't think that makes me any better, or any more favorable, than anyone else at that base. I'm sorry you've had issues with leave before, but it's kind of life (both civi and mil).
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  • image ames17:
    I would have had the same response to your post if your husband had a civilian job. 

    Yes 

    5/100
    "So if you decide to date the guy from Applebees instead will your new SN be "mypearlshisapron?" Your new sig can be "putting the ho in nachos.""- DNBeach12
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  • Will this make you feel better?

    image

    I left it blank so you could fill it in with all your accolades.

    (side note- did not know we could say titty.  This has made my day.) 

    Fuuck TTC - I'm moving on.
    imageimageimageimage
    image
    "It's a child, not a cheeto" Thanks mmariluh!
    "Ew. I've read all of two posts from you, and you stink like rotting garbage."
  • You know what else is gonna get old? Beebeeness from women/people who should be acting like adults.
  • image MrsOjoButtons:

    Your post & run antics have gotten old, as well.

    If people don't want honest opinions, they shouldn't vent to strangers.  If they only want to vent, go buy a diary.  If they want rainbows and butterflies, go talk to a manicurist.

    Yah, sorry about the post and run thing. I'm a teacher so I posted my vent on my lunch break and then went back to my job for the afternoon. I was really surprised by how popular (that's the wrong word but you know what I mean) my vent has become so I decided to just leave it alone. Trying to explain myself would only make things worse.

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  • image MandyBrownNoser:

    Will this make you feel better?

    image

    I left it blank so you could fill it in with all your accolades.

    (side note- did not know we could say titty.  This has made my day.) 

    With those colors, I wouldn't even frame it. I'd carry it around because it would match just about any outfit.

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  • image sgsl2009:
    image MandyBrownNoser:

    Will this make you feel better?

    image

    I left it blank so you could fill it in with all your accolades.

    (side note- did not know we could say titty.  This has made my day.) 

    With those colors, I wouldn't even frame it. I'd carry it around because it would match just about any outfit.

    I like to print important things like recall rosters out in a wallet size and laminate them and stick them in my wallet.  I'd definitely do that for the certificate. 

    Twin boys due 7/25/12
  • image PrincessJesci:
     

    Yah, sorry about the post and run thing. I'm a teacher so I posted my vent on my lunch break and then went back to my job for the afternoon. I was really surprised by how popular (that's the wrong word but you know what I mean) my vent has become so I decided to just leave it alone. Trying to explain myself would only make things worse.

    Does this mean that you see (and understand) why people got so riled up?  Do you make a habit of doing things for or with your DH that he should be capable of doing on his own?  Like talking to his commander about leave or checking the calendar at work for potential leave options?  

     

     

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  • image Shana419:
    Sometimes I want to kick and scream because things don't go my way, especially with my H's career.  But then I remember that I'm an adult, and I can't do that.  Part of being a supportive wife is to learn that yes, you DO have to be prepared for things like that.  Sometimes it takes a while to fully embrace that, but it's necessary.

    Exactly.  You just do not go to your spouses job like that....whether it be Army or civilian.   It isn't your place to do that.  My husband would be livid if I went into the commander's office like you did.  And when I work I would feel the same way if he was to go into my boss' office and do the same thing.  That is just out of line.  Does it suck that he leave wasn't granted?  Of course!  But there is nothing you can (or should) do.

  • image lmcase:
    I agree, I'm already getting a little put-off.  I like honesty, but jeez.  It's not like anyone has said my DH is getting deployed so I think I'll go screw a dozen ppl to make myself feel better.  Now that would be a flame-worthy post!

    Yes

  • image ames17:
    I would have had the same response to your post if your husband had a civilian job. 

    This. Military Board, 2T, 0-3...doesn't matter. You would have received those responses no matter where you posted that statement on TB, and no matter what job your husband held.

  • Honey please, everything about your behavior screams "I'm an immature bratt" from your unwarranted sense of entitlement to your childish posts. Even in the civilian world things don't go according to plan, say for example my husband worked for in an office. He would be entitled to only so many days off annually, and even then those days would need to be approved. Surely you know this working for an elementary school. I would absolutely stomp my husband's booty if he came into my workplace demanding I get my requested time off.  

    You know what I dislike the most about you, your beebee-ish location line. "Kansas because the Army tells us we have to" Hmm

  • 1 - I didn't embarras him like you all are assuming.  Commander wanted proof and he got it along with a pissed off woman in his office because he was being a douche bag. DH asked me to bring the binder in. It didn't hurt his career. He was promoted the next month.

    2 - This wasn't a night out for dinner and a movie. It was our frickin wedding and honeymoon. Our once in a lifetime, dream come true, storybook, fairytale wedding that we had already spent more than a year planning and a crapton of money on.  See how sweet and demure you are when someone threatens to cancel that on you.

    So, yes, I did stand up for myself when things didn't go my way. Yes, I did go straight to the top when he asked me to. Yes, I was assertive. If that makes me a whiny brat then I guess I'll wear that badge proudly.

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  • image PrincessJesci:

    1 - I didn't embarras him like you all are assuming.  Commander wanted proof and he got it along with a pissed off woman in his office because he was being a douche bag. DH asked me to bring the binder in. It didn't hurt his career. He was promoted the next month.

    2 - This wasn't a night out for dinner and a movie. It was our frickin wedding and honeymoon. Our once in a lifetime, dream come true, storybook, fairytale wedding that we had already spent more than a year planning and a crapton of money on.  See how sweet and demure you are when someone threatens to cancel that on you.

    So, yes, I did stand up for myself when things didn't go my way. Yes, I did go straight to the top when he asked me to. Yes, I was assertive. If that makes me a whiny brat then I guess I'll wear that badge proudly.

    Doesn't change the fact that your husband should have been the one to resolve to issue, not you. If you felt the need to compile the information, that is fine, but you husband ought to have presented it to his CO. Doing otherwise undermines his influence in your marriage and his own career.

  • image PrincessJesci:

    1 - I didn't embarras him like you all are assuming.  Commander wanted proof and he got it along with a pissed off woman in his office because he was being a douche bag. DH asked me to bring the binder in. It didn't hurt his career. He was promoted the next month.

    2 - This wasn't a night out for dinner and a movie. It was our frickin wedding and honeymoon. Our once in a lifetime, dream come true, storybook, fairytale wedding that we had already spent more than a year planning and a crapton of money on.  See how sweet and demure you are when someone threatens to cancel that on you.

    So, yes, I did stand up for myself when things didn't go my way. Yes, I did go straight to the top when he asked me to. Yes, I was assertive. If that makes me a whiny brat then I guess I'll wear that badge proudly.

    My wedding almost WAS cancelled because we didn't know if he was going to be home in time. 

    I didn't fly down to San Diego with my wedding binder and all the receipts showing what it cost and throw it at my H's CO to prove anything.

    My husband handled it because he is a big boy. And he made it home just in time for the wedding without my tantrums and without my help. 

    I'm sure when your H's Commander wanted proof, he wanted it from your H. Not from a FI with an entitlement problem.  

    5/100
    "So if you decide to date the guy from Applebees instead will your new SN be "mypearlshisapron?" Your new sig can be "putting the ho in nachos.""- DNBeach12
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  • image PrincessJesci:

    1 - I didn't embarras him like you all are assuming.  Commander wanted proof and he got it along with a pissed off woman in his office because he was being a douche bag. DH asked me to bring the binder in. It didn't hurt his career. He was promoted the next month.

    2 - This wasn't a night out for dinner and a movie. It was our frickin wedding and honeymoon. Our once in a lifetime, dream come true, storybook, fairytale wedding that we had already spent more than a year planning and a crapton of money on.  See how sweet and demure you are when someone threatens to cancel that on you.

    So, yes, I did stand up for myself when things didn't go my way. Yes, I did go straight to the top when he asked me to. Yes, I was assertive. If that makes me a whiny brat then I guess I'll wear that badge proudly.

    Most people would come up with a contingency plan for situations like this particularly when one of the couple is a SM. All you had to do was talk to the people you were hiring. Say something along the lines of "My FH is in the military and he may be called upon by [insert branch] at the last minute, can we come up with a plan for if this happens?" Not that hard to be prepared.

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  • My wedding was rescheduled twice (each time we ended up canceling within two weeks of the actual date)- once due to his job.  I didn't go pitch a "bridezilla" fit to his boss.

    I just called guests and vendors and said we weren't getting married that weekend.  

    Fuuck TTC - I'm moving on.
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  • image

    Put'um on and get over yourself. 

  • think the stupid comments some of you (OP, Shelly, etc) are making is getting old. We are a very supportive group. When a Nestie comes on and vents because everything is boxed up, the house is sold and is told at the last minute that the military changed its mind and they're staying right where they are... we understand, we say it sucks and we're supportive. You're complaining that you don't get enough attention for things you volunteered for and bragging about a b!tch moment. It's stupid and you need to suck it up.
  • (reposting this here)

    You should never step into your SM's CO's office, Let YH deal with his command.. Unless the CO specifically ask for YOU to come in,  (which I have seen done before, but that's Coast Guard not Army, we work in smaller scale)

    I think it was WAY wrong of you to go into that office and demand he get his leave.. No Way would I ever interfere with my husband's work that way..

    Let your husband grow a pair of balls and stand up to his command.. 

     I agree its annoying when everyone keeps saying "well you knew this when you married the guy that service before self" and so on and so forth.. we should be allowed to b!tch... Beware that when posting it on the internet you are going to hear Sh!t you don't want to hear..

    But Your situtation and the way you handled it, I agree with the other posters, you were in the wrong in how you acted.. 

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  • image mrsdc701:
    think the stupid comments some of you (OP, Shelly, etc) are making is getting old. We are a very supportive group. When a Nestie comes on and vents because everything is boxed up, the house is sold and is told at the last minute that the military changed its mind and they're staying right where they are... we understand, we say it sucks and we're supportive. You're complaining that you don't get enough attention for things you volunteered for and bragging about a b!tch moment. It's stupid and you need to suck it up.

    Hey MrsDC, 

    I understand the backlash I got from my original post. However, why are you holding a grudge? I don't think I would ever hold anyone accountable for a one-day impression no matter how stupid I thought their comments were.  

  • image mrsdc701:
    think the stupid comments some of you (OP, Shelly, etc) are making is getting old. We are a very supportive group. When a Nestie comes on and vents because everything is boxed up, the house is sold and is told at the last minute that the military changed its mind and they're staying right where they are... we understand, we say it sucks and we're supportive. You're complaining that you don't get enough attention for things you volunteered for and bragging about a b!tch moment. It's stupid and you need to suck it up.

    Also, we are Bumpies (including you).  

  • image shellyxo:

    image mrsdc701:
    think the stupid comments some of you (OP, Shelly, etc) are making is getting old. We are a very supportive group. When a Nestie comes on and vents because everything is boxed up, the house is sold and is told at the last minute that the military changed its mind and they're staying right where they are... we understand, we say it sucks and we're supportive. You're complaining that you don't get enough attention for things you volunteered for and bragging about a b!tch moment. It's stupid and you need to suck it up.

    Also, we are Bumpies (including you).  

     

    Really??  Are you serious with this?

     

    If my head wasn't already pounding, it would probably meet my desk. 

  • image PrincessJesci:

    1 - I didn't embarras him like you all are assuming.  Commander wanted proof and he got it along with a pissed off woman in his office because he was being a douche bag. DH asked me to bring the binder in. It didn't hurt his career. He was promoted the next month.

    2 - This wasn't a night out for dinner and a movie. It was our frickin wedding and honeymoon. Our once in a lifetime, dream come true, storybook, fairytale wedding that we had already spent more than a year planning and a crapton of money on.  See how sweet and demure you are when someone threatens to cancel that on you.

    So, yes, I did stand up for myself when things didn't go my way. Yes, I did go straight to the top when he asked me to. Yes, I was assertive. If that makes me a whiny brat then I guess I'll wear that badge proudly.

    Your "once ina lifetime, dream come true, was so frickin' special that you could not wait for but went ahead and were legally married before" day?  That one?  Sorry, if it was that very scared and important, you would have waited to be married (this coming from someone who JOP'd and 10 weeks later had a ceremony and reception to celebrate--I understand the importance and symbolism, but did not throw a "bridezilla" fit as you so aptly described your exchange with your DH's commander. 

    Adults don't throw hissy fits.  An adult understands that things happen and they work in calm tones to come to an agreement.  They don't storm into their SO's boss's office and slam a binder of the details of their pretty-pretty princess day for all to see.

    Your sense of entitlement, I see, runs very deep.  Its going to be a long haul for you and your DH, as long as he's in the military.

    ~*~*~*~ Smudges*Mom is Marni~*~*~*~

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  • I will never be a :shudder: Bumpie.

    Ever.

    I don't even like Nestie but it is light years better than bumpie.

    And how long have you been on the nest shelley?  Things are not forgotten... especially not in one day. 

    Hell I still bring up shiit from years ago.   

    Fuuck TTC - I'm moving on.
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  • image MandyBrownNoser:

    I will never be a :shudder: Bumpie.

    Ever.

    I don't even like Nestie but it is light years better than bumpie.

    And how long have you been on the nest shelley?  Things are not forgotten... especially not in one day. 

    Hell I still bring up shiit from years ago.   

    I haven't been on the bump for long. Another pregnancy site asked me if I wanted to join the bump so I thought I would join.

    I have posted a couple of times on Omaha Nest board after some local omaha ladies from The Bump suggested it. Either from that, I avoid The Nest.  

  • image shellyxo:

    image mrsdc701:
    think the stupid comments some of you (OP, Shelly, etc) are making is getting old. We are a very supportive group. When a Nestie comes on and vents because everything is boxed up, the house is sold and is told at the last minute that the military changed its mind and they're staying right where they are... we understand, we say it sucks and we're supportive. You're complaining that you don't get enough attention for things you volunteered for and bragging about a b!tch moment. It's stupid and you need to suck it up.

    Also, we are Bumpies (including you).  

    No, I scrubbed my house from crown molding to floor with 25 pounds of baby bump before giving birth. I nested, I'm a Nestie. It works both ways, see?

     And if you don't know what nesting is, I'll mail you my copy of WTE. 

  • image mrsdc701:
    image shellyxo:

    image mrsdc701:
    think the stupid comments some of you (OP, Shelly, etc) are making is getting old. We are a very supportive group. When a Nestie comes on and vents because everything is boxed up, the house is sold and is told at the last minute that the military changed its mind and they're staying right where they are... we understand, we say it sucks and we're supportive. You're complaining that you don't get enough attention for things you volunteered for and bragging about a b!tch moment. It's stupid and you need to suck it up.

    Also, we are Bumpies (including you).  

    No, I scrubbed my house from crown molding to floor with 25 pounds of baby bump before giving birth. I nested, I'm a Nestie. It works both ways, see?

     And if you don't know what nesting is, I'll mail you my copy of WTE. 

    Hey, I thought it was pretty logical to call people who wrote on The Bump.. Bumpie. Sorry if that offended you so much.  (I am seriously being apologetic here.) 

  • Um, I think what's going to get old fast is people like yourself acting like children, and saying stupid shiit. Everyone thinks irrationally at times, but actually acting on those thoughts and storming into your H's command??? What kind of reaction do you expect when you admit this to people? 
  • image shellyxo:

    Hey, I thought it was pretty logical to call people who wrote on The Bump.. Bumpie. Sorry if that offended you so much.  (I am seriously being apologetic here.) 

     

    And I thought it was pretty logical to use proper grammar.  I guess that's out the window, huh? 

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