Advice Please re: Sad BR News

GuavaGal

I found out this morning that my SIL, who announced to the family on Easter that she'd just had a BFP two days prior, had a doctor's appointment today and found out that the baby had stopped growing.

I've had a close friend go through a miscarriage, so I've been in that situation before, but I'm not quite sure what to do this time around.  I found out about SIL via a phone call from my mom, who talked to my brother this morning after their appointment.  And my brother just sent an email to (I assume) everyone they'd shared their news with, as well.

I likely won't see them (bro, SIL & nephews) until Mother's Day, but I originally thought I'd mail them a note.  Or should I just respond to the email?  If you've been through something like this, what did you do OR was there anything your friends/family did for you that you appreciated?  

Obviously, I'm incredibly sad for both of them, but it just breaks my heart to hear from my mom about how upset my brother was. 

carlinlp

I am so sorry   I would do both, reply to the email so there is an immediate response and sympathy and then follow up with a hand written note.  I'm sure mother's day is going to be hard on her too

balihaigirl

carlinlp:

I am so sorry   I would do both, reply to the email so there is an immediate response and sympathy and then follow up with a hand written note.  I'm sure mother's day is going to be hard on her too

ditto this.  so sorry for their loss.

Kim777

I agree with Lyndsay. I would do both. What I really wished my family had done for us was either meals or gift cards for food. I could barely function to get out of bed for several days, much less worry about cooking.

I also meant to say I am so sorry for their loss. They will be in my thoughts and prayers.

lovemydog

i would also do both. i am so sorry for their loss.  how difficult!!

SaraLouiseBride08

PP advice sounds good. I just wanted to say I'm sorry

L L CG

How sweet you are to ask!

I'd reply to the e-mail with an, "I am so sorry for your loss.  I love you both and I am here for you."

Then, yes, a hand written note would be nice as well.

I am getting all teary remembering how sweet MLF was during mine in December.  The day of my laprascopy she drove to my house and left a bag with magazines, chocolate, a bottle of wine and a sweet card on my doorstep.  If your SIL has to have a D&C, I'd consider something like that, too.  It was incredibly sweet.

thegastons

L*L*CG:

I'd reply to the e-mail with an, "I am so sorry for your loss.  I love you both and I am here for you."

Then, yes, a hand written note would be nice as well.

This is great advice! I'm so sorry your family is experiencing this.

mlf625

So sorry for your family's loss.    And I pretty much ditto everyone's advice above - respond to the email and send a card.  Keep it simple, let them know you love them/are there for them and that you're sorry for their loss.

ndluvsrk

I have no advice other than what the pp have given, but wanted to say that I'm so sorry for your family's loss.

(((Hugs)))

GuavaGal

Thanks everybody!

Emer

Ditto carlinlp.  It took me all day to put this together, but I figured it out when I saw her FB status tonight. 

I'm sure you are already doing this, but I would address your email and note to both of them.