2nd Trimester

Can I please shoot MIL?

Pretty please, with sugar on top?

Last night, we had dinner at her house.

MIL: Monkiem and SO, are you guys planning on vaccinating the baby?

Me: Ummm...yup.

MIL: Why?  You know all vaccinations have aluminum in them.  Dr. Mercola says so.

SO: Mom, are you reading this website alone?  Or are you gathering data from different opinions and medical research?

MIL: No.  I only read Dr. Mercola, and what Dr. Caske tells me when I go with SIL to get (my 5-month-old niece) adjusted.  I don't need anyone else to tell me anything. I believe Dr. Mercola, since he was recommended by Dr. Caske.

Me: Umm, MIL, I've been doing A LOT of research...

SO (cutting in): Mom.  Please don't ask us again.  We're doing all the research we need to do - in fact, we're being obsessive about it.  This is a decision that we have made together, based on OUR research.  We will be vaccinating our child(ren). 

MIL: (niece) didn't get vaccinated.

Me: Then I don't want our child(ren) around her.

MIL: Maybe you two need to think harder about this.  Vaccinations are dangerous.  (Niece) is completely healthy, and in fact, the lack of vaccinations is making her develop faster - look at it, she was trying to walk starting last month.  SIL is making a great mother.

SO and I just stood up and walked out of her house.

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Re: Can I please shoot MIL?

  • YEP....enough said
  • A 5-month-old being adjusted is disturbing to me. I think that could be dangerous. Glad you and SO are together on her being a quack.
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  • Good for you for not backing down and walking away when you realized there was no point in arguing since she wasn't listening. Good job!!!!
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  • I suppose she didn't vaccinate her son (your SO)????  lol
  • imagebabyblueize314:
    I suppose she didn't vaccinate her son (your SO)????  lol

    I was wondering this too... Is she just jumping on the SIL bandwagon, or does she actually have a personal objection to vaccines? 

    But yeah, no point in arguing further, she sounds like a joy to talk with.

  • Good thing your SO backed you up.  You have my permission to shoot her..lol
  • imageBeckyTheEngineer:

    imagebabyblueize314:
    I suppose she didn't vaccinate her son (your SO)????  lol

    I was wondering this too... Is she just jumping on the SIL bandwagon, or does she actually have a personal objection to vaccines? 

    But yeah, no point in arguing further, she sounds like a joy to talk with.

    Oh...both SO and SIL are vaccinated.  Fortunately, FIL believes in them. 

    Actually, SIL does what MIL says to do.  MIL told her that my niece would sleep better on her tummy from birth on since SO and SIL both slept like that 30 years ago, and so SIL puts my niece to sleep on her tummy.  Basically, anything she did when they were little, and what these Mercola and Caske characters say, is the LAW. 

    SIL refuses to do her own research because she simply doesn't like to read and she's lazy.

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  • Thank goodness your DH has some balls to get up and walk out on his mom, lol. My Dh is the same way. He will only take so much from his parents. At some point he just shuts them down and they start putting two and two together that they cant treat us that way when we are around them because frankly we will just leave.
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  • You should totally email her the link to the PBS documentary about the polio epidemic. Babies in leg splints and wheelchairs are enough for me to get my daughter vaccinated. We might do the vaccines a little more slowly (no more than 2 at a time, 2 weeks apart) but she's going to get ALL of her shots.

    so when the neice gets measles, mumps, rubella, pertussis, diptheria, polio, whooping cough and all the rest, will these docs be the ones pumping her full of antibiotics and antivirals just to keep her alive? Will they be the ones calling 911 because she's turning blue and her plulse ox is down to 60? I'm just wondering...

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  • Wow...I think I might have jumped across the table at her.  Way to stick your ground...hopefully she got the point when you guys just left.  Not sure I could have been that calm.
  • My son has been vaccinated and he's been trying to walk for a while.  :)

    I may be missing something, but is your MIL taking vaccine advice from a chiropractor?  

  • imageKate03103:
    Wow...I think I might have jumped across the table at her.  Way to stick your ground...hopefully she got the point when you guys just left.  Not sure I could have been that calm.

    It was hard to stay calm.  I really almost lashed out at her.  What's funny, is she always complains that other people don't respect her, and whatnot (in fact, this is why she can't hold a job for more than 2 years - she doesn't "play well with others")...but she doesn't hesitate to attack other people's decisions and opinions. 

     

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  • imagesmerka:

    My son has been vaccinated and he's been trying to walk for a while.  :)

    I may be missing something, but is your MIL taking vaccine advice from a chiropractor?  

    Yup.

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  • I don't know what to say other than Permission Granted.
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  • Then do your MIL DR's, and Jenny McCarthy!!!
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  • This is my MIL...maybe we can get a two for one deal. LOL  Good luck with her. It just gets worse and worse until you just snap at her.  Which I just do regularly now.  Not polite, but I am a grown woman and do not need to take her nonsense anymore.
  • I can understand wanting to shoot her, but remember, you shoot her you go to jail, she could get custody and then your LO won't be vaccinated and SHE wins!! Big Smile
  • Quoting from Steel Magnolias "Of course you can!".

    What a moron. I would have left too.

  • Tell your mother that a 3 year old child died in our town 2 years ago from menigitis...he was THREE!!! there are vaccines people, children should not be dying.
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  • imageCarabiner252:
    Why is the baby going to a chiropractor? They aren't actually popping her joints, are they? Obviously I don't know a lot about chiropractors, but this seems unnecessary to me. Isn't the point to help you get out of pain? How do we know that the baby's back is hurting her? Sorry if I sound uneducated and dumb, but this is freaking me out a little!

    LOL.  SIL began bringing her DD to her chiropractor when she was about 2 or 3 weeks old because the chiropractor told her that adjustments would take away her colic. 

    I have heard good thing about infant massage (VERY light) - but adjusting an infant is the stuff of lawsuits.

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  • My MIL thinks the same thing!  She's been talking about not vaccinating our kids since before BFP!  She thinks as babies they are too young and that we should wait till they're older (not sure how old this perfect age is).  Obviously I'm not risking that.  In fact that was one of the first things she said when we told her we were pregnant.  UGH!
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  • That's pretty awesome.

    Good for you and SO for staying steadfastly on the same page.  I'm sure that helps deal with the crazy.

  • Yeah. I would have walked out, too. Good for your SO standing up to his mother!

    I hope your MIL reconsiders her narrow-mindedness and realizes she will not be making decisions re: your baby.

  • SO annoying!! It's amazing what you learn about human behavior while pregnant. I appreciate MIL's concern, but wouldn't you think that you will come off offensive purporting to care more and research more than the PARENTS!?
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  • imageshall923:
    A 5-month-old being adjusted is disturbing to me. I think that could be dangerous. Glad you and SO are together on her being a quack.

    Actually it can help w/ colic and reflux and other issues. :)  

  • Ugh, I didn't know anyone else's in-laws were like this! My SIL works for a chiropractor and is also totally anti-vaccine. Everybody there acts like that's such a great idea. She also took her daughter to be adjusted for the first time at a few weeks old. If they tell me do do any of that with my baby, I'm going to laugh. Of course, they already dislike me so much because of my different opinions, they're barely speaking to me, so this might not be an issue.

    I hope walking out helps your case with them. My DH walked out over something they said to us and we stayed gone for two years-- it didn't help. 

  • Wow.  She is ignorant and rude.

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  • imageflippy1234:

    imageshall923:
    A 5-month-old being adjusted is disturbing to me. I think that could be dangerous. Glad you and SO are together on her being a quack.

    Actually it can help w/ colic and reflux and other issues. :)  

    I don't believe that.  Not for a single minute.  Maybe in the short term it helps, but I believe that bones that are still developing, should not be disturbed.

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  • Actually there is a difference in chiropractors.  There are relief chiropractors that people go to that adjust you only when you hurt and are all about the quick fix.  Then there are wellness chiropractors that help to restore the natural curves in your spine to help your central nervous system function better therefore your entire body functions better. 

    It is perfectly safe for a baby/child to get adjusted.  The adjustments a chiropractor does on a little one is completely different then those done on an adult.   

    As far as vaccinations I think that each parent needs to look at both the pros and cons on vaccines and do their research entirely.  I personally read Dr. Mercola's newsletter but do not agree with some of the things he says about certain subjects.  But I take what he writes and do my own research on those subjects. 

  • imagehis1stmy4th:

    It is perfectly safe for a baby/child to get adjusted.  The adjustments a chiropractor does on a little one is completely different then those done on an adult.   

    Until multiple studies are done for the LONG TERM potential for or against adjusting a newborn, I would NEVER do it.  I wouldn't even feel comfortable doing it for a 10 year old.

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  • imagemonkiem:
    imageflippy1234:

    imageshall923:
    A 5-month-old being adjusted is disturbing to me. I think that could be dangerous. Glad you and SO are together on her being a quack.

    Actually it can help w/ colic and reflux and other issues. :)  

    I don't believe that.  Not for a single minute.  Maybe in the short term it helps, but I believe that bones that are still developing, should not be disturbed.

     I hope they at least got a second opinion from the dentist (please note sarcasm). 

  • All I can say is good for you!
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  • imageCarabiner252:
    Why is the baby going to a chiropractor? They aren't actually popping her joints, are they? Obviously I don't know a lot about chiropractors, but this seems unnecessary to me. Isn't the point to help you get out of pain? How do we know that the baby's back is hurting her? Sorry if I sound uneducated and dumb, but this is freaking me out a little!

    DH is a chiropractor, and he's adjusted babies that were only a few weeks old. It's completely different than adjusting an adult, they really just press lightly with their fingertips. And chiro isn't just to get rid of pain, it's also to maintain health by keeping everything aligned. DH's argument- think about how traumatic birth is on the body. But I wouldn't take my baby to just any chiro- it would have to be a doctor I was completely confident in.

    And OP- two claps for you. I would've done the same thing!

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  • imageJhawkCE:
    imagemonkiem:
    imageflippy1234:

    imageshall923:
    A 5-month-old being adjusted is disturbing to me. I think that could be dangerous. Glad you and SO are together on her being a quack.

    Actually it can help w/ colic and reflux and other issues. :)  

    I don't believe that.  Not for a single minute.  Maybe in the short term it helps, but I believe that bones that are still developing, should not be disturbed.

     I hope they at least got a second opinion from the dentist (please note sarcasm). 

    LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  • lol It is a personal choice.. are vaccines dangerous? ... well yes they have there risks.. I take care of people with developmental disabilities and one of the girls I work with was born normal and had a reaction to a vaccine and has chronic seizure.. she has regressed to a 2 year old state... now saying this.. her sister didnt get a vaccine.. because her parents were (understandably) paronoid to give it. Last year when there was an outbreak of a virus (I forget what it was) at some of the subways (like restraunt) she caught it because she wasnt vaccinated... Ussually the risks of vaccinating out weigh the risks of not vaccinating... there is that 1% chance that your baby will have a reaction.. but a higher percentage that they will catch a virus that will have life altering affects if you dont. But like I said.. its your choice and MIL needs to learn this
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  • Wow! That is all I got...
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  • imageCarabiner252:

    but I'd have to see research studies in peer-reviewed medical journals before I'd let someone mess with my baby's spine.

     The research is out there- you just need to look for it. I completely understand that people don't "trust" chiropractors- I used to be one of them. But now that I'm married to one, I get defensive when people write off the entire profession as bunch quacks without trying to learn more about it. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but please make it an educated opinion. (Carabiner don't take offense, I'm not trying to call you out- plenty of people share your opinion, but it's still a misinformed one.)

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