Mean Kids - Age 4 :(

MrsBrandiGreene

At the tender age of 4, it appears there are mean kids in daycare    I know this is something we'll all deal with one day, but I didnt expect to so soon.  (Caveat....Harrison does have a proven vivid imagination...see the breaking arm story)

He told me last night at lunch that a boy in the Private PreK class said - "Your shirt is stupid and you're stupid".   He told me last night with tears in his eyes    I told him to just tell the boy that he didnt know what he was talking about and walk away.   How sad is that!!   I remember stuff like that from grade school/middle school and it honestly hurts more when its your own child!   ugh....this parent thing is hard!!

amanda_holbird@hotmail.com

Poor Harrison.  That makes me sad.  I'm not looking forward to going through this, either.

Amy_729

Awww, sad. I hate to hear that poor H's feelings got hurt

myrall

I'm sorry. That's terrible. It really makes you wonder, as a parent, how a child comes to be like that. Is it nature? Is it nurture? What plants that seed?

Kerrin

I am totally with you on this.  Carter just recently (as in 2 weeks ago) moved up to the Private Pre-K class.  He'll be 4 in a few weeks.  There is a BIG difference in children that are 4.5 and close to turning 5 in that class.  The kids can be ruthless.

He's already come home on several occassions and said that a certain child in class calls him a baby, and that he can't be in that class b/c he's not 4 yet.  Another kid calls him "mean".  Poor kid was in tears.

So tough for him, but it's part of life's lessons.

MrsKLB

Aw, poor Harrison!  I'm sure he's a tough kid, though, and will be just fine.  I know it must be harder to be the Mommy!  Ugh.

mrsd0907

Oh no, poor Harrison!! I'm sorry, I know it's got to be tough to see him in such pain. I'm not looking forward to this in the future.

maykat

That is just awful!!

We are dealing with it with Alec.  He had been telling us that a boy named Chase kept hitting him in the back.  Well, I just found out that Chase is almost 4 and sometimes is in Alec's classroom in the mornings before his teacher arrives.

DH has been trying to coach Alec to hit Chase back, but Alec just says, I'm nice and I don't hit".

missmlp

Oh this scares me. 

scarlet115

Kids can be worse than adults. You should hear the things I hear kids say to each other. Its awful.  It will get worse. I hate that for him. I hate it for you too- cause I'm sure it hurt you more than him!!!!

hthomas02

ugh that sucks!  and is so sad!  it just hurts your heart!  a GF of mines daughter is 2.5 and is in a clique in their daycare class!  there are three little girls and they are best friends except that now one day two of them will say to the third "we're not your friend today, you can't play with us" and then the next day like nothing happened and then a few days later two others will pair up.  I was floored, at 2.5?  that just isn't supposed to happen yet!  we were playing at a different playground the other day and there were 6 year old boys there and I got really scared of the behavior to come.

MrsBrandiGreene

Oh, and I should add that his shirt was NOT stupid    lol....just trying to find the humor.   (And he's not stupid either) 

seansgirl2006

That is heartbreaking.    Sadly many of my kindergarteners are meanies too.  They can be so rude to each other.  And some of the ones that are, I see where they get it honestly.  I think it's a bunch of the garbage they watch on TV and copy too.  Some of those Disney shows are just baby soap operas.  So many kids are just spoiled rotten and have this sense of entitelement.  Their parents cater to them all day long.  I think at this young of an age they have to learn it from somewhere. 

And Heather, your story just gave me a flashback to elementary school and a group of girls I was friends with.  Ugh, awful.  Someone was left out everyday for whatever reason.  I came home in tears often.  But at 2??  Scarry.

ally-cat

Ugh!  Poor Harrison!  : (  I agree, this type of stuff is going to kill me when Max is of age.  : (

hthomas02

ally, I think Max is just going to beat the sh$t out of anybody who is mean to him and therefore no one will be mean to him!

ally-cat

Hahaha Heather!!  Why do you think that?  He's such a tiny delicate fella...

momof2inatl

Ugh! That just makes my heart hurt for him! Give that boy a BIG hug and tell him he is SO special! Then go tell off the mama of that mean boy! hehehe

dbryson

I'm sorry.  That is horrible.

I noticed my SIL's niece doing the same thing to Ridge over Easter.  I wanted to punch her.  Luckily Ridge didn't really catch on to what she was doing/saying.

budgetbride26

I can't believe it is starting at the age of 4 - I thought I didn't have to worry till all the middle school clicks and drama set in.  Poor Harrison, hopefully if he ignores it this kid will stop since he is obviously just trying to get a reaction.  Unfortunately, it is a hard thing to explain to kids that not everyone is nice and respectful of others. It would have broke my heart too!

UGAbride

Gosh, that's heartbreaking!  It kills me when Jack or Ethan is even just getting left out at this age, I hate to see my kids feel sad or get hurt.  Sorry Harrison's feelings were hurt   I know it's inevitable, and that sometimes they might be the "bully", so I just try so hard to teach them how to be kind to others, and that people that might say mean things are just not worth your energy. 

K&P414

myrall:

I'm sorry. That's terrible. It really makes you wonder, as a parent, how a child comes to be like that. Is it nature? Is it nurture? What plants that seed?

I struggle with this.  Emma has a tendency to be mean to other kids.  I don't think she ever said anything like what the little boy said to Harrison but sometimes she's just not kind to others.  She is very compassionate, she will go out of her way to help a kid that's lost, or get a band-aid if someone gets scrape, that kind of stuff but she would often torment some of the kids in her class.  And usually it was someone that was weaker, slower, more shy, etc.  I talked to my pedi about it on many occassions and she felt like Emma was just exhibiting alpha characteristics.  One of the key phrases that has gotten me though some tough times as Emma's mom is that I have to wait for her head and her heart to match up.  It's not that she's a mean kid, she's still figuring out her place in the world and with positive encouragement I am confident that she'll get it right sooner or later. 

K&P414

I wanted to add that she's also been on the receiving end before too.  And honestly, I think that as she's gotten older and had her feelings hurt or been left out or excluded has helped her understand how NOT to act towards others. 

I tell you, the older Emma gets the more I realize that the baby/toddler stage is a freaking cakewalk. 

slwprincess

OK this post just makes me want to go out an invest in a bubble for Gavin.  I got so upset at daycare the other morning- as I was dropping him off, he tried to close the door behind me and another kid (the son of a different teacher) was trying to come in at the same time.  This kid is at least 4, probably closer to 5 and has no business in the 2 year old room, but whatever.  Well, when Gavin didn't move fast enough, the other kid tried to kick him.  I didn't even have to say a word, every teacher in that room saw my face and knew I was PISSED.  The mom of the kid did come over and apologize but really, that kid should know better.  I get that toddlers hit, pull hair, bite, whatever... they can't communicate.  But this kid is too old to behave like that and why did he need to?  I guess I don't understand why parents aren't teaching manners and common kindness anymore?  This really bugs me.

donna&ed

OMG. That is so sad.  I can't believe that they can start at that early stage. Just read an article abt a teenage girl committing suicide bec of bullying from Mean girls. How scary is that!