I think I'm venting more than anything but also looking for advice from those that have been in similar situations. MIL watches DS Mon-Thur (I WFH on Fri). I am very greatful that she's watching him because he loves going there, she loves spending time with him and it's free. Everything is great except we have had recurring issues with food. I only want him eating healthy nutritious food, no junk/fast food. I pack his breakfast and lunch, I've given her a list of foods that he's eaten and is allowed to eat, and DH and I have told her we just want him to eat what we bring.
So now that DS has become somewhat of a picky eater, she has decided to give him McDonalds chicken nuggets and fries 3x in a 2 week period! The 1st 2 times were 2 days back to back and when we found out, DH clearly told her not to give DS fast food anymore. He needs to eat what we pack and if he doesn't want it, offer again later, then move on to fruit/snack.
Yesterday, DH goes to pick up DS and sees he hasn't eaten the lunch we packed. When he asks why, she says because they went out. While out, she got hungry so they went to McDonalds and he ate chicken nuggets and fries! DH tried very hard to stay calm and again told her we don't want DS eating fast food at all. Why is it so hard for her to understand this? If you're going out, take his lunch bag, it's pretty simple. To make matters worse, he didn't even finish his 2nd sippy of EBM, which I've told her before he needs to finish both cups especially if he doesn't eat a lot. It's so frustrating! Then she goes and complains to FIL saying DH yelled at her so FIL calls DH and they have a "talk". It's ridiculous, she can't talk to him about it, puts FIL in the middle and makes DH the bad guy.
FIL thinks MIL takes it personally because her son is telling her how to take care of her grandson as if she didn't do a good job with her own kids. I get that but he's OUR son, we get to make the decisions and we try to be as nice as possible in communicating them, and giving her freedom with snacks as long as it's not junk. Is there anything else we should be doing to avoid having this problem? Anyone been here and gotten this problem resolved for good?