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Georgia Babies
Poll: Grandmothers
So many people posting about their grandmothers got me thinking about my own. They are both deceased but I loved them both so much. My fathers mom, Helen (whom Evelyn's middle name is after), I was closest to. I spent weekends with her when I was young and then grew up and got busy and have always regretted not visiting her more before she passed.
My mothers mom, Ruth, I also loved, but wasn't as close to. I was born on her birthday and she always told me to remember I was born in April, so I am entitled to diamonds. She also gave me her birthday so I could get more presents and she didn't have to get older. I didn't see her as much because they moved to Hilton Head when I was five.
Both of my grandmothers died when I was in my early 20's and I think both of them would have loved to meet my husband and my children. When I married Nico, I had both of their wedding bands tied into my bouquet so I could have them with me in some sense.
Sometimes I miss them so much and today I am thinking about them a lot (and also thinking of sigkapbride and budgetbride).
Do you have a grandmother you were/are very close to? Are you close because of proximity or is there distance between you?
Do you think your children will be close with their grandparents like you were? I am very sad about the fact that Evie doesn't have grandparents like I had. Evie's are crazy. I can't imagine her having the emotional bond with her grandparents like I had with mine. My husband can't understand that because he wasn't close with his grandparents, but it just makes me very sad.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Poll: Grandmothers
I was blessed with two sets of wonderful grandparents. Unfortunately, all 4 of them died within 5 years of each other... when I was in high school through early college.
Anyway, my father's parents lived just down the street from me my entire childhood. I was extremely close to them and spent every summer at their house with my brother and cousins (they had a pool!). My grandmamma was an excellent cook and granddaddy loved his grandchildren more than anything! Most of my memories of them are about food and fun.
I never really got to know my grandparents as an adult, since I was pretty young when they all passed, so I love to hear the stories of the relationships all of you have with your living grandparents. It will be interesting to see what my child(ren)'s relationship his grandparents are...
Mommy to Abigail Elizabeth (11/4/11) and Brady Jasper (7/2/09)
my blog
Michelle, your experience with your Grandmother Helen sounds very similar to mine with my Nana, who just passed away. Although, the truth is that Nana had not been herself for a long time when she died due to her illness so I was glad she could be at peace even though I miss her so much. At any rate, I grew up with her and visited her very often in childhood, and would even come home to her house when I was sick in college with colds and whatnot. When she was recovering from her cancer and before her mind started to go we got especially close, with her telling me many things I don't think she told my sister or cousins. She left me her wedding band and when the will is probated I intend to wear it with my rings. My other grandparents are not very interested in me or my sister and well, I guess I have let that go. When DH's grandparents were alive they loved me as if I was one of their own and even though our time was brief I appreciated that.
Polly's grandparents have their flaws but they love her very much. My MIL is weird but I think she takes wonderful care of Polly and Polly is very close to her and her husband (Pawpaw). I wouldn't want them raising her and MIL gets on my last one sometimes, but I do feel like they should have a close loving relationship. I am hoping my parents will start stepping up to the grandparent roles more, but right now they are both in some very self-absorbed times in their life. I am hoping they get over it enough to enjoy their grandkids the way they should.
Cool post....
I was very close to my mom's mom whom I was named after....she was Julia, husband was Louis...I was Juliann Louise, well until i changed my middle name after I got married to maiden name, sorry grandpa.
Julia lived to be 98 and was a hoot. Everyone loved her, she was born in 1900 and saw so much in her lifetime. She played piano by ear - we had many fun singalongs growing up, she was very artistic and loved to crochet. i still have several blankets from her....that polyester yarn will never die! She always had a good joke, often carried them around in her purse. She had 24 grandkids and every year mailed a card with $1, up until I was 21. Louie the love of her life died when she was 79 and she moved to an apartment in buckhead for the elderly. She died in her bed at 98 of old age and was pretty active until that last year. She was bedridden the last month of her life, I was one of the last 2 grandkids to see her. She didn't drive so I would help out take her to church and pick up stuff for her if she needed it. I have been thinking of her lately, I really miss her. My mom died when grandma was 85 and then she lost a son after she was 90. It hit her hard as she said no one should bury a child....which when I went through it made me think its hard no matter what age. She had 7 kids and one miscarriage. We all called her Granny.
I never met my dad's mom, she died when he was only 23. My husband's granparents died when he was very young, he doesn't remember them.
Our Asst Director at preschool lost her husband last week to colon cancer. I have been in a funk all day, thinking of all the funerals I attended within my own family and how much I miss them all. Its been 12 years since Granny died, but I miss her...she was truly one of a kind.
For some reason, we called our grandmothers by their last names. My grandma Gray (Ruth) was fiesty and small. She grew up very wealthy until she was about 9, then the stock market crashed and her father killed himself and they lost everything. She moved into a trailer with her aunt but never forgot what it was like to live with servants. She spent the rest of her life waiting for people to wait on her. But she was spunky and had a devilish twinkle in her eye. I also think I inherited my love of shoes from her. She golfed because she liked the cute outfits and everything had to match all the time.
I was with her with she passed, two days after our birthday, 2000. My mom, two sisters, brother, aunt and I held hands around her bed as she breathed her last breaths. I have never been with anyone else as they passed and it was unbearable for me. I shook for hours after.
My grandma Scag (Helen) was a tiny woman from Ireland who married a man from North Italy and spent the rest of her life cooking like a true Italian. She made her own sauces and pastas. She would get up early and start the sauce and I would wake up at 7 to smell of garlic and basil and oregano in the house. She made the cutest meals when we were together.
I spent so much time with her a kid. She never drove. We would go with her friend Mrs. Bacon every Thursday to the strip mall with the JoAnn fabric, KMart and supermarket. We would have lunch at Friendly's (anyone from the north knows it) and I loved spending the day with her.
She would tell me stories about my dad and aunts and I wish I would have written them down. She was a hoot. She loved my grandfather so much. When he died, the funeral director found a note in his pocket from her that said "I'll be with you soon, Ralph. I love you". She died nearly 20 years later. She used to pray to Jesus that he would take her to her husband. So sad.
I miss them both so much. I am very emotional today.
I sadly was not close to any of my grandparents.
My mom's mom, Nellie, passed away before I was born. I've been told I have her personality and her legs. She is the one person I regret never meeting. She once invited in a homeless lady who knocked on her door and shared a beer with her. Turns out that homeless lady was Jackie Robinson's grandmother who was wandering the neighborhood.
My dad's mom, Margaret, passed away when I was in my 20s. She lived in Ireland and we would see her as often as possible. I was extremely sad when she passed, but I never felt like I knew her.
I was very close to all my grandparents growing up. I met all of my great-grandparents save one and the last one died when I was in college.
My father's parents lived about two miles from us. When my parents divorced, my Granny cared for my sister and I often. Granny and Granddaddy are still living and in their 80s. We took Geneva to see them yesterday and my Granddady said, "Ruth, can you believe we're over 80 years older than Geneva?!" They both got a good laugh out of that.
My mom's folks lived in Delaware and Georgia while I was growing up. They were a riot. Grandpa passed away from a complication of a surgery back in 2003, but Grandma's going strong. She's 86 this June. I have only vaguest memories of my Grandma's parents, but they were real ***-stirrers.
Things really got complicated when Dad remarried. Then I got a pair of step-grandparents. My step-mom's mom (Meema) is still living.
My mother, step-mom and dad are really the only grandparents Geneva knows. DH's mom and husband live in Oklahoma and DH's dad and stepmom hide out in Augusta. We don't have much to do with any of them and they don't have much to do with us. DH seems content with that.
The only grandparent I ever knew/had a relationship with was my dad's mom. She passed away in 2007. That was hard. We never lived close until she moved up here from south georgia to be put in an assisted living facility. During that time ( about 1 year) we got really close. I was absolutely devastated when she passed. She's been the only one close to me to ever die. I hope my kids have an even better relationship with their grandparents. Right now, its great because they all live so close and she sees them on a regular basis. But that's not going to always be the case. She adores them all and never wants to leave them when she stays with them. I do get sad because all I ever wanted was my grandmother to be around long enough to meet my first child. She died just a few months before I got pregnant.
DH's maternal grandmother is still alive, but she lives out in Utah. But he still talks to her at least once a week. They are so close! I hope Abigail has that kind of relationship with all of her grandparents.
Abigail Taylor 09.18.2008
I was very close to my maternal grandparents and esp my grandma. My maternal grandparents lived close to us and I grew up with them but they both passed away before I went to college. I was not very close with my paternal grandparents. They moved to FL when I was in early elementary school but also because my mother did not get along with my paternal grandmother.
DH and I moved to Atlanta to be "closer" to family. We were living on the west coast with no family near us. My parents reside 3 hours away from us now- we consider that close. DH's parents live in Canada on the eastern seaboard. So being anywhere in the eastern US is closer than were we living before!
Who knows were careers will take us. Honestly, we could end up back on the west coast at some point. So I really cannot say that my children will be close with their grandparents like I was with my maternal Grandparents.
I've been thinking alot about family and how they live so far away but that is our life and we wouldn't move to where they reside because it's rural and the others are out of the US in a remote part of Canada.
My Mom's mom, Grandmama, was such a special lady. She died 9 years ago at 85 and I think of her all the time. I miss her alot! She was so fun and we spent a lot of time with her even though she lived 5 hours away. I have so many great memories of my childhood at her house. We spent almost every holiday there and stayed by ourselves in the summer time. Holidays haven't been the same since she died. I hate that she isn't here to meet Owen and enjoy a great grandchild. My grandfather died when my Mom was 13, so I never knew him and my Grandmama was a very independent person because if that. She raised 2 kids by herself. She was very active until she died and we are all thankful for that. She would have been miserable if she couldn't have done what she wanted, when she wanted.
My Mom is called Grandmama too and Owen loves her! She is the one he is really attached to out of our parents. I'm happy for them both to have that relationship. We see all of our parents every couple of months, at least, and want Owen to have a relationship with all of them. My FIL just retired so maybe we'll see him more now. All of our parents were soooo looking forward to a grandchild, it makes me happy to watch them with Owen. It's a very special relationship for a child to have, I think. And Owen's great Grandmother, GG, is loving him too. It's 20 years between my youngest cousin and Owen. She has been waiting for a baby for a long time and lets us know it.
We were there for Easter and Owen was very generous with the hugs and kisses. He was a very good boy for her. She even got him to go to sleep with out crying in his PNP, gave her such an ego boost. Too cute! 
I was very close to my mom's parents growing up, more so to my grandmother than my grandfather since he and my grandmother divorced when I was in 1st grade (but got remarried a month before DH and I did!). We always lived really close to and even bought her house from her when I was in 7th grade and moved in. she's making Reese's quilt for the nursery and the curtains.
I wasn't that close to my dad's parents...they didn't really have much to do with us for some reason until we got to be much older (like high school/college). Both my husband and I were very blessed to have had all 8 grandparents at our wedding...we're now down to 6 since both of my grandfathers have died in the last few years.
I know Reese will be really close to my parents since my mom is going to quit work and be our nanny and my grandmother will probably come with her to babysit some days. I'm not sure about my husbands parents...they claim to be excited, but they are a strange bunch and I'm not sure how it will go.
Michelle, it sounds like both of your grandmothers were wonderful in their own way. Your story of your Grandma Scag reminds me some of my Memere who I went to visit in San Fransisco in February.
Memere (Mem-may) is French-Canadian.She married my Italian grandfather in her mid twenties and it was considered marrying later in life for that day and age. She learned to cook all the Italian food and Memere and Nanu (Nan-ewe) catered Italian dinners as a side job. I have the chaffing dishes they used to cater and I love to use them for parties. I think they make the food taste better. They both worked full-time. Her as a seamstress and he as a machinist. She was a wonderful seamstress and made clothes and beautiful quilts. I will put the quilt she made for my childhood bed on Cadence's bed some day. She also knit and crocheted and I pestered her to teach me many times but she said it is hard to teach something she had been doing so long. I learned how to knit from the old ladies in the Assisted Living when I worked there. I showed Memere that I could knit and pearl. I like to think she was proud of me for that. She loved Nanu dearly and never really got over his passing in his 50's. She lived with us for 20 years. First in our home in MA and relocated with us to GA when I was 16. She moved out unexpectedly after my sister's wedding. Her daughter, my Dad's sister, came for the wedding and they packed up all her stuff and moved her to CA without explanation. There has been tension and hard feelings between her and my parents ever since. It was a hard call to go out and see her in February. I am so glad we did though. There is some bad communication juju in my family and I wanted to take a step toward breaking that cycle for Cadence. Memere loved holding her and playing with her and she hugged me hard and thanked me so sincerely for coming.
I think this post has gotten long enough, but I will mention that my Mom's Mom Dorothy is still living as well. My parents are in the process of moving her from FL to the same neighborhood they live in. I am grateful for the opportunity to get to know her better and for Cadence to grow up with her nearby.
(((HUGS))) to all the ladies who have lost Grandmothers or mothers. I know those can be complicated realationships at times but when you look hard at them there is most always beauty of some form in them.
DD- 9
DS-6
c/p- April 2016
missed m/c- 6w5d; discovered 8w2d- September 2016
I never got the opportunity to know my grandfathers. My mom's dad died when she was 16 and my dad's dad died when I was 3 months old. My mom's mom (Nana) died when I was 14 and my dad's mom died when I was 19 years old. I was crazy over my grandmothers. They were such strong and independent woman. They both lived alone for years after their husbands died, but they did such an awesome job raising their families. I really miss them.
As for my boys, they are extremely close to my mom, their GG. My dad died in 2002 so they never got to know him. Dh's biological father is not a part of our lives so he will never be a part of the boys'. As for my dh's mom and stepdad, they are around, but seldom see the boys. They live about an hour away, but they have such busy lives that we never get to see them. It really makes me sad for my boys because I feel like they don't have a good grandfather figure. Dh's stepdad is a great guy, but he just isn't around. He travels for his job and is never home. I just wish the relationship was stronger for my boys.
I am incredibly blessed because I have not 2 but THREE living grandmothers- all living locally and I am close to them all and what is even more amazing is that they are all close to each other as well. They talk on the phone every week... we even share holidays. Really, my family is AMAZING. And DH's family is as well. He still has 2 of his 3 grandmothers living as well. In fact, let me break this down for you to show how blessed Gavin is... He has:
2 Grandfathers
2 Grandmothers
2 Great-Grandfathers (we had 2 pass away last year)
5 Great-Grandmothers
And the really funny thing... 3 of those Great-Grandmothers are named Louise!
I eat lunch with my Lulie every week. And I really should get to Fayetteville to see my other two more often. They are all strong, funny, deeply loving women who have shaped me into the woman I am today. There is no doubt that I have traits from each of them. I know that I am blessed beyond words and I try hard not to take it for granted... 1 day very soon, I will be wishing for this time back.
I was extremely close to my maternal grandparents. My mom and biological father got divorced when I was very young and I don't really remember his parents. I haven't seen him since I was a little girl. My stepfather basically raised me but I was never close to his father and stepmother. She is still living. She's a nice woman but an odd bird.
At any rate, my grandparents and I were so very close. I was their only grandchild. They were snow birds and spent half the year up north in Philly and have the year down south in Florida about 20 minutes from where I lived. I was lucky as I spent many, many weekends with them while I was growing up and I also spent most of my summers up north in Philly with them.
My grandfather passed away in 1994. He was such a warm, generous man. He loved practical jokes and had such a great sense of humor. DH and I had our first date on April Fool's Day and I joke that it was a sign that my grandfather was up there looking out for us. Benjamin is named after him.
My grandmother and I were extremely close, more so, if that's possible, after my grandfather passed away. We spoke every single day on the phone. I still hear her voice in my head when she used to answer the phone and I was on the other end. She was such a stubborn woman but so loving and generous too. She was a pistol. She once chased after a truck who rear-ended her and made him pull over while she called the cops. Turns out the man had an arrest warrant out for him. She was so proud of herself. My mom and I, on the other hand, were freaking out when she told us about it. Gosh, I miss her. She passed away in 2002, four days after her 82nd birthday. Noah is named after her.
I can't wait to take the boys to Philly and Atlantic City (we still have our family cottage there) and show them where I grew up and spent my summers. I want to take them to all of the places my grandparents took me. I know they'll be close to my parents. My mom comes up every few months and my dad comes up once or twice a year. DH's mother passed away in 1994 as well and DH's father is a nice man but not the warmest, if that makes sense. He's also very set in his ways and probably won't see the boys that often.
This is a cool post. I am very close to my Grammy (maternal Grandmother). She is 88. She is from Poland. She is so sweet and full of fun stories. She basically raised me (along with my Grampa who passed away from cancer when I was six). My mom went back to work at 6weeks and she watched me every day and when my mom got sick after my brother was born, I lived with her. Then, later in high school, when my parents renovated, I moved in with her again (she lives five minutes from my parents). I always hoped and wished she would meet our children and she has! Juli loves to visit her! She's Grammy to nine grandchildren and Great Grammy to one. She is very special and we are blessed to have her.
Everyone who has lost their Grandparent recently is in my prayers (and they are watching over you).
Traci, I can hear my Grandma Scag's cackle of a laugh, too. She really was a mischeivious woman!
One other thing I remembered today was that my grandma S crocheted and everyone who got married or had a baby got this one blanket she could stitch in her sleep. I always lamented the fact that I never got one. You got to pick your yarn for your blanket.
When I got married, my dad showed up at my bridal shower with an enormous box. Inside was a blanket from my grandmother. I don't think it was made for me, I think she made it for my dad's wedding to my step-mother. But he knew how much it meant to me and gave it to me. I cried like a baby when I opened that box and was so overcome with emotions I could not even tell the guests at my shower why this blanket made me cry so much.
Abigail Taylor 09.18.2008
I have one living grandmother, MaMa (maw-maw). She's relatively miserable. My grandfather died unexpectedly of a heart attack when he was only 62 and she's been pretty bitter ever since. To add insult to injury she met and became bf/gf with Ben about 12 years ago. He became part of our family but sadly he died last year. I don't think she'll ever get over losing the two of them.
When I was little we alternated Sunday lunch after church between my Dad's parents and my Mom's parents house. My Mama made the best mashed potatoes. She called them Creamed potatoes. She also used to keep Andes mints in the freezer
And, she had every single color of lipstick made by Clinique, Estee Lauder, Maybeline and Revlon. My cousin Kelly and I used to write a note asking her if we could play dressup and use her makeup and she always said yes. We'd put on her lacy slips and high heeled shoes and gobbs and gobbs of makeup.
It makes me sad that we don't have a close relationship now. I wish we did and I struggle with just sucking it up and forcing myself, and my children on her. She's just so rude and judgemental. Visiting with her chips away at the happy memories I have of her from when I was little.
My dad's mom, Granny, died almost 4 years ago. I miss her terribly. My dad took her passing very hard so I've tried to keep some of my greiving to myself. I used to love helping her cook. Just last week I caught myself picking up the phone to call her. I wanted her recipe for Chocolate Sheet Cake, it was my dad's favorite. I wept when I realized that I'd never be able to call her on the telephone. She's also who I got my love of coffee from. Sometimes if I get an extra hot cup of coffee I'll toss in an ice cube and it makes me smile to remember that she used to always do the same thing.
My girls are very close to my Mom. They call her Honey. DH's parents live in West Palm Beach and we see them as often as possible. DH's mom is a fantastic grandmother.