Attachment Parenting
bedshare until when?
Part of me says everything is fine. Part of me says, 'sleep train- it will make things easier in the long run'. Feber even??
I don't know which part to listen to. Then I read of the Montosori bed and thought- "great- thats perfect- I can fall asleep with her, in her room, go back to my room- but come to her if she needs. But she is crawling- soon walking- and she fights sleep as it is.
I'm lost. Things are fine the way there are, but if we ARE going to sleep train, I want to do it and get it over with. If we arn't I want to prepare my DH for a 2 yr old in the bed...
I love that we bedshare- but when- and how- does it end??
ETA: My SIL's kids just started sleeping in there own beds, sometimes- at 9 yrs!!! I don't want that!
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Re: bedshare until when?
We are bed sharing until it doesn't work for us anymore. DS slept with me until 3 months.. then his own bed til 2, back in my bed til 4ish.
DD has been with me ever since she was born other than a few days on her mattress beside our bed.
If your ok with how things are you can always work on changing it later when its not working anymore.
I am going to move DS to hiw own bed (not crib) at the end of the month. I'm just waiting for my internship to be over.
I'll lie down with him to go to sleep, and if he gets up in the middle of the night I still want him to stay in his bed. We'll see how it goes. DS has never been a fantastic sleeper.
you need to do what works for YOUR FAMILY. If bedsharing works and is easier and better for you, continue to do it. If it doesn't work anymore, find a solution that does.
DS slept with us for most of the night until about 9 mos. Then he started kicking and would either sleep with us when he woke up early morning, or when he woke up in the middle of the night. But he'd always thrash around, or try to get off the bed. And he began STTN consistently at 14 mos.
Ditto the pp - do it as long as it works for you - all of you.
We just moved kiddo to his own bed in the past few weeks. So far, so good!
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DD slept with us until 16mo, when she moved to a twin mattress on the floor. The transition was not hard - not perfect either, but not a nightmare. And considering that I nightweaned her at the same time, I think that's pretty good.
We did lay down with her to get her to sleep for almost a year after she started sleeping in her own bed, but we slowly weaned her off that and now we just do our routine and shut the door and she goes to sleep.
We never did CIO. If she cries, we respond to her even at almost 3. Last time she was sick I tried to put her in our bed and she wouldn't stay there she cried for her bed. So bedsharing absolutely does not mean you'll have a kid in your bed for 9 years.
The solution for our family is to have the kids start the night in their cribs and join us later. So if they sleep all night, we don't sleep together, and if they wake we can comfort and nurse as needed in our bed.
With my DD, she started in her crib from night 2 and didn't STTN consistently until about 14 months. With DS, he started in his crib consitently around 10 months and just in the past week we've had our first 7 hour stretches. Sleep training isn't the right choice for our family, because of our temperment and the temperment of our kids.
Good to know! Thank you. Maybe that's all I needed to hear.... That sounds similar to how I see things going in our house. Was she on a bed in her room- or in yours??