biting at daycare

Brewtowngrl

Any of you had to deal with this?  My child seams to be another child's chew toy.  I have signed my 4th incident report in the last few months.  He is only there 2 days a week.  I am sick of it and pretty sure it is the same offender.  This time wasn't too bad of a bite, but the last one broke skin through his shirt. 

I am going to talk to the director tomorrow.  I would hate have to threaten pulling him because I really don't want him to leave since I love every thing else about the center.  I have no idea what the bite policy is.  I know a lot of places have a "3 bites and you are out policy".  The other twist is I am pretty sure who the offender is and I know her parents from high school.  They are nice people, but their daughter is a handful.  I also know that if it is her that is biting DS I am positive the mom is horrified that her daughter is doing this.  The mom is also due to have a baby the same week as me so I know she has a enough stress. 

WWYD? What would you request of the director to handle this?

lep712

As a parent whose kid has bit at daycare a few times, I feel horrified every time it happens.  I have NEVER seen my child bite anyone before, and on three separate occasions at daycare, she has bit.   As for your side, I totally get why you're upset.  I would talk to the teachers in the room first to see what is prompting the biting, find out more about the situations, see if it is the same kid, etc.  I know my DD has always bitten the same kid, but it's a kid who constantly takes toys away from her, which instigates the biting.  Since all this happened a few months ago, the DCP has kept a better eye on the interactions between the two and there hasn't been any more biting.   Being a teacher as well, I always appreciate parents who approach me first with concerns before heading to a higher up.  Obviously if it is not handled, I would then go to the director. 

Brewtowngrl

Thanks.  My child is kind of the wimp in the class so maybe he stood up for himself those times and didn't let the other child have the toy.  He is the youngest in the class and really lets the other kids have their way.  I will talk to his teacher first when I drop him off. 

aforst

I was the mom of the biter. I was really horrified that my sweet little boy was doing this.  The frustrating part for me is that he wasn't doing it any where but daycare!  We talked w/ our dcp about trying to intervene before it happens.  I realize this isn't always possible with so many LO's. We talked to DS night and day about not biting, how it hurts people, it's a no-no.  He has not bitten since (*knock on wood*).  I know I would be upset if DS was getting bitten, so I totally understand your frustration. Maybe you can find out if it's the little girl you think, or what the circumstances are surrounding the biting.  I don't know if you would feel comfortable enough to speak w/ her parents about it?  It's a hard situation all around. 

silvurturtle

Uggh...biting blows on all fronts.  It is upsetting for the kids, the parents and the daycare.  That being said, 4 ouch reports in a couple months is too many.  I would talk to the teacher first and find out:

1.  same kid or different?

2.  at what time of day did the bites occur?  Most bites occur during periods of transition, meals, before and after nap, and diaper changes.

3.  What is he teachers immediate response to the biting?  Who does she focus on first?

I had to have this talk with my DD's teacher and then again a conference with the teacher and the director.  Knock on wood but I haven't had to sign anymore ouch reports since. 

My mantra was anticipate and avoid.  In my DD's case, she was being bitten unprovoked by the same kid during times of transition and diaper changes.  I requested that the teacher become the offenders shadow to prevent any occurrences of biting (my DD wasn't the only victim) and in times when her hands needed to be busy during transition and diaper changes that she either have Maddie read next to her to separate her from the biter, have the biter sit next to her, or utilize the other classroom teacher and stagger periods of transition.

This seems to be working really well.  Good luck and I'm sorry that you have to deal with this. Confrontation is always uncomfortable but it is necessary to be your baby's advocate.