Did anyone "fall" into being a SAHM unplanned?

MrsPatterson

I would love to be a SAHM but right now DH doesn't think we can afford it.  I think we could, but things would be really tight.  I'd probably have to find a part-time job, but we could do it.  We might have to find out soon because there's a good chance I'll be getting laid off.  

Did anyone get "forced" into being a SAHM?  (I hate to say forced because it makes it sound like a bad thing but I can't think of a better word.)  How did you make the necessary financial adjustments?  Did you have to move to a more affordable place?

dionnemd10

our plan has always been 2 kids and i could stay home-however i would say i was forced early because my position was eliminated at the end of october so i have stayed home since then.   bonus is i have been collecting unemployment-which is nice.  but yep we made the switch earlier than anticipated.  

since i am home more-we don't eat out or order out nearly as much--i like to cook and experiment.   we still do daycare, but only 2 days per week and that will only be until the end of May.   i don't drive nearly as much-gas savings.  so it all adds up little by little.  we also lucked out that maternity leave etc fell during tax return time so we got a huge boost with our return which is nice.

haven't had to move.  it is all about being more conscious of the budget and where the money goes.   like no more daily trips to walmart but rather a weekly what do we really need.

littlemermaid

Have you tried living off of just your husband's salary and saving yours in an account you do not use for bills just to see the impact it would have on your lifestyle. 

Also start by making a spreadsheet and keep track of every, and I mean every, penny spent.  You can use an excel spreadsheet.  This will give the both of you a clear visual of where your biggest expenses are and where you could make cuts(house phones, cell phones, cable, internet).  Downgrading all these plans will save you money.  Also call your car insurance and find out how much of a savings you will get if you change your driving status to "recreational".  When a car is not used to go to and from work then it is considered "recreational" so if you became a sahm you would fall into that category.

ElizC

Yup! I got laid off last June.  We have been saving my unemployment as a cushion and living off of DH's salary.  Our lease is almost up and will be moving to a different cheaper townhouse.  Not just to save money, but DH's office is moving as well.  Also DH had been planning on replacing his car and we have decided to wait until his Escape dies to replace it.  We really don't need two new cars and really could get by with one if we needed not.  Not that we plan on doing that.

detroitblondie

Me!!  I lost my job when I was pregnant and it totally didn't seem likely that I would find another being obviously pregnant and having to go on maternity leave soon after being hired.  We just cut back on pretty much everything- only eat out for special occassions (birthdays, etc.) got rid of cable, got rid of my cell (got a home phone instead), got rid of one car, started cutting coupons and watching sales, started taking books and movies and free passes to museums out of the library, started doing free family outings (like the zoo, parks, etc.) and packing picnic lunches...  We have never been on such a tight budget but we've never been happier.  It's all about being together as a family now and that's what really matters.  Oh, and this year I'm starting my first vegetable garden would should totally help in the summer because we tend to buy produce like crazy... )  If you put your mind to it, you can totally do it.  You just have to decide what your priorities are first.  SAH is not for everyone.  Hope this helps!

yellowsnow

I was laid off at 10 weeks and received unemployment.  I decided to stay home with DS for 6 months and then look for a job, but haven't been able to.  Thankfully, unemployment has been helping with the bills since we had to evict our tenant and have been paying two mortgages since last April.  It was wonderful at first because we saved so much money because I wasn't buying gas, food at work (mostly Starbucks!), I didn't need many maternity clothes, etc.  I was also able to research saving money on car insurance, cable, etc.  Now, I have the time to coupon clip and find great deals on things we need.  If we didn't have the 2nd mortgage for our rental, we'd be able to live off DH's salary alone. 

detroitblondie

Oh & I started selling girly-vintage things online which is part hobby/part income.  Every little bit helps... and it's like my fun money, too. 

BritClen

yea, I was laid off in november, though we kinda knew it was coming so we saved up a lot in saving. Now we live off of DH salary and I do get unemployment.

we did a lot to adjust out bills, like lowering our interest rate on cars and paying off all the little things. we also cut our extra things like HBO and gym member ship. It really added up and we saved alot of money in the end.

I suggest you put away at lest 3/4ths of your checks into savings, this will give you a fall back and let you see if you can afford to stay home. 

GL!

ash2

I guess you could say I just fell into it. I had made arrangements with my job to work part-time from home, but after my maternity leave was over, I was told that it wouldn't work out and I would have to come to the office. DH and I decided it wasn't worth it since my commute was 50 miles each way, so we opted for me to stay at home. We had talked about it while I was pregnant, but never really thought we could afford it. But with a little budgeting, it worked out great. I was no longer spending all that money in gas commuting to and from work, we lowered our cable bill, cancelled memberships to things we didn't really need or use, and we started budgeting our groceries and eating out, which was probably our biggest savings. When I went over our bill for groceries and eating out, it averaged about $700 per month! With couponing and sales shopping, we now spend $300 per month on groceries, diapers, and household products. We only eat out maybe once per week, so about $60 per month. We also realized how much money we wasted on alot of things. Once you realize that you HAVE to budget, you realize how much money you were really throwing out the window.

 

ariel06

I got laid off 2 months before DS was born.  I think it was the biggest blessing ever.  DS was the worst sleeper for the 1st year and I don't know how I would have functioned.

We live pretty basically with no cable or gym membership.  We budget to go out to dinner once a month.  We have our cars paid off and our only other loans are the morgage and our student loans. 

EnglishMajor03

I was forced to be SAHM to a SN child.  We were lucky enough to be savers in the first place and really lived within our means so despite the fact that we are stretching our buck as far as it can go we're making it work.

Temp174496125006552

Yes, I was voluntarily laid off last July.  Business was bad because of the economy and the one owner of the company said that someone was going to be let go.  DH and I crunched the numbers and with the 20% paycut that I had taken, if we didn't have to pay for childcare and I got unemployment, it was pretty much a wash.  So, I asked to be the one to get laid off.  It would have come down to me or one of the other two women in the office...and they're both the sole income providers in their families and needed their jobs more than I did.  I figure it was a win-win situation all around.  They got to keep their jobs and I get to be home with Ben.  I'll be going back to work at some point, but for now, I'm just enjoying this time with him that I wouldn't have otherwise had.

detroitblondie

seans_grl:

Yes, I was voluntarily laid off last July.  Business was bad because of the economy and the one owner of the company said that someone was going to be let go.  DH and I crunched the numbers and with the 20% paycut that I had taken, if we didn't have to pay for childcare and I got unemployment, it was pretty much a wash.  So, I asked to be the one to get laid off.  It would have come down to me or one of the other two women in the office...and they're both the sole income providers in their families and needed their jobs more than I did.  I figure it was a win-win situation all around.  They got to keep their jobs and I get to be home with Ben.  I'll be going back to work at some point, but for now, I'm just enjoying this time with him that I wouldn't have otherwise had.

God bless you!  Seriously, even though it worked out best for your family- it is SO kind of you to think of the other women you worked with.  

firsttogo

I was let go while on bedrest with my first son. I was eligible for unemployment, and that helped. The job market is tough right now so I am still home. We cut coupons, find free things to do, and live within our means!

jmn69

Sort of.  I always wanted to SAH, but we didn't think we could affrord it so I had every intention of going back to work.  But we had twins, and didn't realize just how expensive day care was going to be.  There would have been very little of my paycheck left over, so not worth being away so many hours a week.  So I "got" to stay home after all, which is want I wanted anyway.  It's really tight financially, but luckily we had some substantial savings.

safy

I was kind of forced into it.  I'd always wanted to be a SAHM but didn't think we could afford it. When I was 4 mos pg with my first, I lost my job.  I was offered another job (at a lower pay) but since I'd be going on maternity leave in less than 6 mos, I didn't think it was fair to the employer so after talking to my DH about it, we decided to give it a try and see how it'd work with me being a SAHM. The rest is history.

As for the financial adjustments, the biggest thing was stop eating out. That alone saved us hundreds a month. We started small. Wrote down things that were a luxury and slowly eliminated one thing at a time to kind of help us ease into a different lifestyle. 

skinnursemandee

Dh is military and a few weeks after giving birth we had to move over 1000 miles away from my job. I havent looked for one yet and most likely dont plan on it at least anytime soon

 

winterOT

A little late to reply here...but we also moved (2000 miles) for DH's job. He moved a little over a month prior to DS and I, so I was responsible for all of our stuff, organizing and coordinating the entire move all while working full time plus (and trying to help train my replacement prior to leaving!) I had been doing some phone job searches during my long commutes but was not having anything fall into place quickly.....and needless to say I haven't jumped on that yet (its been 8 months!) We have had some family issues going on and that required some extra travel time and time away from our new place. And now at 27 weeks pg I'm learning to enjoy it! I was actually just asked for my resume last week and a the extra income will be nice, but not full time!!!