TTC After a Loss 6 Months+

Today is my second EDD and I just feel so detached from it

Those with multiple losses, do you feel less attached to the significance of the day. Like my D&E feels so long ago and it feels like I haven't really been pg since Noah back in April. Maybe part of my numbness was that today is a year since we found out that we were most likely going to lose Noah because the size and dates didn't match up. Today almost seems very fitting to be so rainy and craptastic!!
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Re: Today is my second EDD and I just feel so detached from it

  • I'm sorry. ::hugs::  I can't answer your question, but I can pray for you and your angels. ::more hugs::
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  • Hugs.

    I know exactly how you feel, and was thinking of posting something like this over the last few days. Nov. 15th, my first edd, loomed so large and was such a hard day. But the other three...I didn't fixate on the due dates as much, because I was so nervous about the pregnancies. And it's like - everyday is the overwhelming sadness at times. Those days will be the same.

    Numb. That is exactly the word for it.

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  • imageambrandau2:

    Hugs.

    I know exactly how you feel, and was thinking of posting something like this over the last few days. Nov. 15th, my first edd, loomed so large and was such a hard day. But the other three...I didn't fixate on the due dates as much, because I was so nervous about the pregnancies. And it's like - everyday is the overwhelming sadness at times. Those days will be the same.

    Numb. That is exactly the word for it.

    Thank you Allison, I feel better not feeling guilty that I just feel mechanical. ::HUGZ:: Thanks!!

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  • Quite honestly, I don't think the EDDs will affect me that much.  It's just another day that I won't be pregnant with that baby or holding that baby.  Sad, but true.  Numb or not, I hope you make it through today ok.
    ---------------------------------------------------------------
    4 early losses 2009, 2010, 2015.  Baby #1 born 2/13/11.  
  • I know for me the second EDD was difficult only b/c our second pg was more viable (shorter lived than the first, but the first was a Blighted Ovum, so never had a chance. the second we saw the jelly bean. . .it was a chance). I understand though. And now that I've passed my second anniversary of 1st EDD, I can tell you although the date and thoughts were in my head, being upset was not really b/c of that, but rather that I am still childless.

    big hugs.

    m/c#1 07/16/08 (11 weeks), m/c#2 10/10/08 (8 weeks). and then nothing since except every test possible (no answers). IUI#1 and #2: BFNs Super lucky to be buddies with Peetie. Our out of nowhere, surprise DD born 5/29/2011
  • I felt the same way as mlmtgg.  I was able to see the HB with the second pregnancy and when we found out about the loss I was in complete shock.  The second EDD was actually more difficult for me.  I think it had a lot to due with being so close to my m/c anniversary as well. 

     

    (((hugs)))

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  • I totally understand where you're coming from (I think).

    I just passed my 1st EDD and don't really even think much about the 2nd EDD. I think Allison said it already but with the first preg. I was that blissfully ignorant, there's no way that could happen to me kinda person. And as a result I was shattered when I lost the twins.

    With the second pregnancy I just never, ever allowed myself to feel 'good' about it or even think about the due date, how summer maternity clothes would fit, etc.

    Maybe part of it was that our first preg. was identical twins and the second preg. was a single. Also, with 1st preg. we knew it was girls, the second I was very clear that I didn't want to know the gender (after the mc and they did the testing).

    I don't understand all the reasons why the first loss was so much more painful (both losses wer late first tri) but I do understand your guilt over feeling like you should be falling apart with every loss. I think we just learn how to cope better after the first loss (assuming the losses were similar).

    Hope this makes sense and either way, huge hugs!

  • I'm sorry hun. Sometimes I do, I just feel numb. I hope tomorrow brings a better day for you, not just inside but outside too. (((HUGS)))
    TTC Since Oct 08 BFP #1- 1/23/09, missed m/c 2/26/09 BFP #2- 9/8/09, natural m/c 9/16/09 BFP #3- 4/13/10, missed m/c 5/26/10 BFP #4- 4/6/11 beta#1 at 12dpo-133 prog-55.7, beta#2 at 16dpo- 861 DD born 12/8/2011 BFP#5- 11/23/12 EDD 7/25/13 Dx- Uterine septum (removed Aug 2010), endo, MTHFR C677t hetero, Factor II hetero, Low Protein S Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Yes.  I felt kind of detached with my first EDD.  I never got an official EDD for my second one, but I knew it was around the beginning of March, so I just kind of thought of it in passing.  My third pregnancy measured the furthest and we got to see a baby and a hb, so I'm terrified of my third EDD in August.  I think that one might be different than the other two.  I'm so sorry you're going through this. Sending lots of hugs your way.
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  • Sending hugs.

    Jenn

    image 3 IUI's all BFN

    IVF#1 BFN IVF#2 BFP, loss at 19 weeks FET#1 BFN IVF#3 BFP, m/c FET#2 BFN

    Missing our twins Zachary and Madison, lost at 19 weeks on 11/13/09, edd 4/9/10

    BFP 7/17/10, m/c 7/25/10, edd 3/25/11

    Ectopic, lost left tube 4/20/11, edd 12/6/11

    my blog

  • ::::HUGE HUGS::::
    Marie, wife to Ron, mom to DS
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