Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
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your ME time - do you feel guilty?

When you have days where you go get pedis with your friends, or go to the movies with friends, do you feel stupidly guilty about it? I ask more from those that are SAHMS like me - with husbands who work outside the home. I find myself feeling guilty for 'me' time on the weekends with friends, and it's so dumb! DH gets out, but he only stays out for like 2 hours max, playing tennis or whatnot - whereas my outings take a lot longer..   so, do you feel guilty??

Re: your ME time - do you feel guilty?

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    no.lol

    but dh also goes out with his friends if he wants to and my "me" time 95% of the time includes dh.

    aidan kincaid (12.19.06) sawyer grace (7.30.08) 
    reese madeline (5.11.10) miller paige (2.6.12)
    girl #5 due december 2013.



    13 galveston1



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    I used to.  It felt like I was 'dumping' the girls on him.

    I recently got over that and have since taken two vacations on my own. 

    Happy moms = happy babies.  In order for us to be happy we have to somehow mantain our identity and do something for ourselves that is ONLY ours.

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    No but I don't do fun outings nearly often enough. Usually if DH takes over with the boys on my day off, it's so I can fold laundry, vacuum, clean bathrooms or go grocery shopping. :P
    fraternal twin boys born january 2009
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    I do, only because I work full time and I feel like my weekends should make up for not being w/ him all week. I usually go horseback riding on Saturdays and am gone about 3-4hrs, sometimes sooner if I'm feeling guilty.
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    Ummm.... no?

    I meet friends sometimes for coffee or, more frequently, ice cream. lol. But we don't go get pedis or anything like that, and I am rarely gone for more then 2 hours unless DH and I are on date night.

    Most of our "going out" time is with groups of friends, and DS comes along as well, even though he is currently the only baby. (That is changing in May!)

    But I wouldn't feel guilty for going, if it helps you be a better mom because you can relax. It's just not my thing.

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    My "me" time is naps and bed. Sometimes I get a haircut or something, but it's rare. I don't feel guilty leaving DS, I feel guilty leaving DH. He's not alone with him that often and DS can be a picky person with the teething.
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    I work, so DH gets DD up and brings her to daycare. I pick her up from daycare and if I am going out, I am out until after she is well in bed. That means I only see her for 15 minutes.  I feel INCREDIBLY guilty. I can't tell you the last time I scrapbooked because I feel TERRIBLE if I am not spending my awake/home time with DD.
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    Uh, in a word, no.
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    The first few times I felt guilty, but not anymore. DH really truly doesn't care, he loves having Stella and daddy days. I get at least one day a week to go out with friends, by myself, or with my sister to do whatever. If I need another day, I go for it. If DH wants to go out, I don't have issues with it either. I think we are both more sane and happy when we get a little room to breathe so it's actually good for our family.
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    nope.  not at all. 

    i have a standing girls night about every two weeks.  and dh and i have date night ever week.  that time with my husband and my girlfriends is pretty important.  i feel like it makes me a better me, thus a better mommy.

    :)

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    Honestly, no, I don't. I don't think it matters, either, but since you brought it up, I don't SAH, I work full time.

    I don't "go out" a lot. My girlfriends and I have get together at least once a month for dinner, drinks, and a movie. About once a month, I try to get out for some scrapbooking. Other than that, it's more spontaneous, but I sometimes just go shopping on my own or spend time with a friend or whatever. DH and I are trying to have monthly date nights at least.That actually sounds a little pathetic, but our childcare options are extremely limited, so we're doing the best we can. Sunday nights we have a silly thing where we sample a new bottle of wine and a new kind of cheese with no TV, computers, etc. Except tonight, because my dad is visiting, so he and DH are watching a James Bond movie.

    Honestly, I love my DD more than life, and I spend as much time with her as I can, but it's a balance. My marriage is also important, my friendships are important, my creative time is important.  These things matter, too, very much, actually. 

    At first, I thought I would feel guilty, but honestly, I don't. It's good for Lily to have some time with her dad without me, too, y'know? 

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    Lord no...we went out for our anniversary last night and I about ran out the door.  I love my daughter more than about anyone else, but I like to have a moment away from her every now and then.

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    Yes. I feel like being a working mom means you have to spend every minute you can with the babe. This is sort of warped and I realize that but it's hard and the guilt is easy to give in to. DH doesn't help. He thinks "why don't you want to be with DS?" The thing is, when you're at work and away from your LO it's not "me time" ... its work! So there has to be time in there somewhere that's just for you.
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    I feel very guilty leaving DD if I am having "me" time with friends or alone. So, I rarely go out. However, if we have date night, i don't feel that guilty.  it's important that dh and i have time to ourselves.  
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    Ditto. Never.
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    I'm going to the dentist tomorrow to get a crown put on.  That's me time, right?
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    My true 'ME' time is at the gym. When I don't hear or see my kids for an hour straight lol. Most of the time when I go out with friends for shopping or whatever I take DD with me and we make it a special girls night. I tried to get away yesterday afternoon with my mom but DD stood in the driveway crying with her cute lip curled out in a pout. I couldn't say no to that pathetic face.
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    I never feel guilty. "Me time" as a phrase sounds selfish, but it really isn't. You are doing something for you as a woman/individual that you NEED to be a good mother/wife, etc. I think a lot of the guilty feelings comes from feeling judgment from others who say "Oh I am a completely devoted 100% mother and can't bear to be away from my children for one second, and that makes me a better mother than you." This line of thinking is BS and I think is what society makes us want to believe. I am on a mission to release mothers from this tyranny! :)
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    When DS was really little yes, but now that he is older, I need that time.  I have a mom's night about once a month and I got my first pedi in a year this past weekend.  The girlfriends I was with asked me if I felt guilty and I could honestly say I didn't.  I never get pedis and it was so nice to catch up with friends without having to worry about DS having a fit. 


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