Babies: 0 - 3 Months

picking up baby everytime she cries?

I personally do but experienced friends say that you shouldnt jump to her side at the first sound of a cry. one friend says though they need your bonding and love it will also hurt to overdo it cause she will learn to always do that to get your attention.

Re: picking up baby everytime she cries?

  • If he's just kind of complaining a little bit, I give him a minute to see if he works it out on his own. A lot of the time, he does. But if he's really crying, I pick him up. He's way too little to cry it out, IMO.
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  • most times i do-but there are times he just has to cry for a few minutes until i can get done doing something.   but at 2 months old or younger and actually probably up to 5 or 6 months he needs to know i'm coming pretty soon to comfort him.   my husband is the one who is better at letting the kids cry.   i would say at 3-my daughter-knows there are other and much better ways to get my attention than to cry.  
  • imageMarthaP18:
    If he's just kind of complaining a little bit, I give him a minute to see if he works it out on his own. A lot of the time, he does. But if he's really crying, I pick him up. He's way too little to cry it out, IMO.
    This I wait until he gives a real cry or two and then I pick him up.
  • It depends on the cry. If they are just a little fussy, I will wait a minute or so to see if they settle themselves. If they don't settle quickly or if they are really crying I pick them up soon. That said, with two sometimes someone has to wait and cry for longer than I would let them if there was just one. I always apologize to the one I have to let cry and tell them that I understand being a twin has got to be hard.  
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  • I think you're the mom and you should do what makes you comfortable.  There is no "right" way to do things.
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  • imageMarthaP18:
    If he's just kind of complaining a little bit, I give him a minute to see if he works it out on his own. A lot of the time, he does. But if he's really crying, I pick him up. He's way too little to cry it out, IMO.

    this.

  • I'm also of the camp of letting her complain a bit to see if something is really bugging her.  Our LO tends to cry and in the middle of a cry just fall asleep suddenly.  It is pretty funny (if you're not sleep deprived).  We're starting to be able to distinguish her cries.  She fusses herself to sleep a lot, and we've learned to let her go a little with that. It just seems to be her way, especially when she's overtired.  If it's a full out screaming cry, I'll go get her ASAP.

    Sometimes babies are just going to have to cry, and you can't kill yourself over it if you can't get to him or her as quickly as you'd like.  For instance, when there's a diaper blow out, LO HATES having her clothing changed and will generally scream bloody murder.  I know she's fine, just a little ticked off.  Unfortunately she's going to have to cry for 2 minutes while being changed and then put somewhere safe while mommy tries to get the poop stains out!  

    I don't want her to cry it out, but sometimes you just can't get there instantly (such as when you're in/just got out of the shower and are trying to get dry and dressed!).

  • Trust your gut mama.
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  • i have read that you cant spoil as  baby in the first 6months,i always pick her up as soon as i can,usu. she fusses a little bit first tho.
  • Your friend is high.

    At this age, they cry because they need something from you. Picking them up every time isn't going to train them to be needy.

    Besides, there will be times that, no matter what, you can't get to them immediately. And they'll survive.

  • Babies can't manipulate you yet, and you can't spoil them.

    I learned in a baby class that untended crying translates into pain for a newborn as it releases cortisol. 

    Article: Science Says: Excessive Crying Could be Harmful to Babies

    Untended - meaning you are there and able to comfort your baby but just aren't, like they can see you and you aren't helping them.  If you avoid eye contact etc..  Apparently if you are communicating to them (i.e. "I'm coming, I'm coming!  Just as soon as I ...") it does not count as untended.

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  • Why would you want to listen to a crying baby longer than you have to? Don't let your baby suffer un-consoled. Babies under 6 mos can't manipulate, it just isn't possible.
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