I just judged a mom at Target

MotherBucker

But I hate this.

 

She had 4 kids with her, 2 in the basket, 2 walking. The little girl, who looked to be about 3-4 was having a tantrum asking for some doll

 

THe mom said "no, you can't have it, come on"

The little girl is yelling that it's her doll

The mom does the count thing (1.........2........never follows through, another pet peeve)

 

THe girl takes off, and the mom leaves the other kids and runs after her. I went down an aisle, came back up, and saw them walking off. All kids are in the baskets. And the little girl has......a doll

 

The mom totally got the side-eye from me.

BeckyTheEngineer

I used to work at target, and literally watched from 15 feet away as a baby fell out of a shopping cart and hit the floor.  Some people, why would you walk away from your baby??

Maria Agnesa

Ya, I don't like the give in either.... but could she have been just keeping the kid quiet so she could finish up her shopping, and then have no intention of buying it??

niccole_e

haha, yeah but she has 4 kids. I don't think I could side eye a mother of 4, shes a saint in my book already

Aliliv

The follow through is hard in stores:)   However, giving in isn't good either.....  When Olivia freaks out over something like that, we just move on - I say "Olivia, enough"  very firmly......I keep on walking.   She still pouts, or freaks out (or whatever), but I literally ignore it.     She doesn't really freak out over toys in stores, anymore

But......I only have two kids to tote around in stores, so that could be something that changes the dynamic, for sure! 

ETA:   I just remembered that we've put stuff in the cart that we were not going to buy, before!!!   That's a handy little trick, too:)

beebcaf

I think that lady was at my Target too. Last week I saw a woman with 4 kids, 2 in the cart 2 walking just like you said. The little boy in the cart was taking off his shoes and throwing them at people. He hit me with it but I nicely picked it up and handed it back to the mom. She didn't say thanks and then put it back on him. So he took it off and threw it at me again. When I handed it to her again and mentioned that I had been hit twice she told me that if I didn't want to get hit by the shoes than to get out of throwing distance. Nice.?

amy0105

Erg!!  I had a boyfriend with a then 4 year old -- we went into Target because I wanted to buy him a little toy...he started having a temper tantrum so I took him by the hand and said, "Either you stop and we can get the toy or we'll leave the store and go home" (something like that)...

He continued...so, I put the toy back...his dad proceeded to get the toy off the shelf and buy it anyway...!!!!

It was only a $5 toy - but, I was SOOOOO pissed!!!  I hate when people don't follow through...(but, a big part of me realizes that my husband may turn out like that, too!!) 

niccole_e

Maria Agnesa:

Ya, I don't like the give in either.... but could she have been just keeping the kid quiet so she could finish up her shopping, and then have no intention of buying it??

Good point I do this in Target as well! 

micaelasmakeup

beebcaf:

I think that lady was at my Target too. Last week I saw a woman with 4 kids, 2 in the cart 2 walking just like you said. The little boy in the cart was taking off his shoes and throwing them at people. He hit me with it but I nicely picked it up and handed it back to the mom. She didn't say thanks and then put it back on him. So he took it off and threw it at me again. When I handed it to her again and mentioned that I had been hit twice she told me that if I didn't want to get hit by the shoes than to get out of throwing distance. Nice.

Oh Lord.

bumpuser1691848

Although I'm not a mom yet, I just want to say from watching Suppernanny and all those shows, her giving in like that is just going to lead to the kid thinking she can have whatever she wants from now on and just fussing until she gets it. And these people wonder why their kids act that way... um, because you didn't stand your ground when they were younger, they expect you to give in now.

Go ahead and flame me for stating my opinion when I don't have a child of my own yet.

sweetcaroline10

beebcaf:

I think that lady was at my Target too. Last week I saw a woman with 4 kids, 2 in the cart 2 walking just like you said. The little boy in the cart was taking off his shoes and throwing them at people. He hit me with it but I nicely picked it up and handed it back to the mom. She didn't say thanks and then put it back on him. So he took it off and threw it at me again. When I handed it to her again and mentioned that I had been hit twice she told me that if I didn't want to get hit by the shoes than to get out of throwing distance. Nice.

This is ridiculous.

amy0105

beebcaf:

I think that lady was at my Target too. Last week I saw a woman with 4 kids, 2 in the cart 2 walking just like you said. The little boy in the cart was taking off his shoes and throwing them at people. He hit me with it but I nicely picked it up and handed it back to the mom. She didn't say thanks and then put it back on him. So he took it off and threw it at me again. When I handed it to her again and mentioned that I had been hit twice she told me that if I didn't want to get hit by the shoes than to get out of throwing distance. Nice.

Wow...just wow...

miss.jess

beebcaf:

I think that lady was at my Target too. Last week I saw a woman with 4 kids, 2 in the cart 2 walking just like you said. The little boy in the cart was taking off his shoes and throwing them at people. He hit me with it but I nicely picked it up and handed it back to the mom. She didn't say thanks and then put it back on him. So he took it off and threw it at me again. When I handed it to her again and mentioned that I had been hit twice she told me that if I didn't want to get hit by the shoes than to get out of throwing distance. Nice.

If I were you I would have grabbed the shoe and thrown it as far as I could.  lol

I think there should be a 1 adult to 2 kids ratio when out. I would lose my mind trying to manage 4 kids.  I will say that sometimes I will let Brooke hold something until we get to the check out and then ask the lady not to scan it.  B doesn't even bat and eye that she didn't get it.

MotherBucker

kimandhuck:

Although I'm not a mom yet, I just want to say from watching Suppernanny and all those shows, her giving in like that is just going to lead to the kid thinking she can have whatever she wants from now on and just fussing until she gets it. And these people wonder why their kids act that way... um, because you didn't stand your ground when they were younger, they expect you to give in now.

Go ahead and flame me for stating my opinion when I don't have a child of my own yet.

 

I couldnt' agree more. All this kid is learning is that she just has to scream, yell and run off and embarrass mommy and she will get whatever she wants.

 

My kids (and I have 4) know that no means no.

cowboys2009

beebcaf:

I think that lady was at my Target too. Last week I saw a woman with 4 kids, 2 in the cart 2 walking just like you said. The little boy in the cart was taking off his shoes and throwing them at people. He hit me with it but I nicely picked it up and handed it back to the mom. She didn't say thanks and then put it back on him. So he took it off and threw it at me again. When I handed it to her again and mentioned that I had been hit twice she told me that if I didn't want to get hit by the shoes than to get out of throwing distance. Nice.

 The second time it happened the shoe would have been mine. Or I would have hidden it. What a witch. I would be mortified if my child behaved like that in public.

bumpuser1691848

beebcaf:

I think that lady was at my Target too. Last week I saw a woman with 4 kids, 2 in the cart 2 walking just like you said. The little boy in the cart was taking off his shoes and throwing them at people. He hit me with it but I nicely picked it up and handed it back to the mom. She didn't say thanks and then put it back on him. So he took it off and threw it at me again. When I handed it to her again and mentioned that I had been hit twice she told me that if I didn't want to get hit by the shoes than to get out of throwing distance. Nice.

I would have told her if she couldn't control her kids any better then not to go out in public. You have every right to be there. What a biitch.

Aliliv

kimandhuck:

Although I'm not a mom yet, I just want to say from watching Suppernanny and all those shows, her giving in like that is just going to lead to the kid thinking she can have whatever she wants from now on and just fussing until she gets it. And these people wonder why their kids act that way... um, because you didn't stand your ground when they were younger, they expect you to give in now.

Go ahead and flame me for stating my opinion when I don't have a child of my own yet.

I'm not going to flame.  I agree with you.    It's still a pick your battles sort of thing, but with Olivia if I've already said no, I can't give in because she always remembers!!!  I hate when they have good memories!

sarasek

That's why my nephews still get what they want, most of the time. There's a lot of whining, pouting, crying, etc., because my sister would give them anything they were screaming about when they were younger just to get them to shut up about it.

Dh and I have discussed we're going to be very firm about what 'No' means. Screaming and crying is not going to get them their way...

AMossy

BeckyTheEngineer:

I used to work at target, and literally watched from 15 feet away as a baby fell out of a shopping cart and hit the floor.  Some people, why would you walk away from your baby??

Maybe if they had a leash they wouldn't have to run after the child!

April4bride

When we were little, my mom told us from the beginning that the rule was, "If you ask for it, you don't get it!" - I fully intend on sticking to that rule as well.

purplngldkitty

BeckyTheEngineer:

I used to work at target, and literally watched from 15 feet away as a baby fell out of a shopping cart and hit the floor.  Some people, why would you walk away from your baby??

 

Oh!  That might have been my friends baby....  that happened to her at Target and he broke his collar bone!!!!!

melzer14

April4bride:

When we were little, my mom told us from the beginning that the rule was, "If you ask for it, you don't get it!" - I fully intend on sticking to that rule as well.

Oh I like that!!!! Good one  

ShuTree

niccole_e:

haha, yeah but she has 4 kids. I don't think I could side eye a mother of 4, shes a saint in my book already

 AGREE!

allyandpat2010

My kids know better than to act like that. They may ask for things and if I say no I may get a pout or an arms crossed but thats about as far as it goes. If they ever threw a tantrum like that or ran away they would find themselves in the bathroom with a hot little heinie. Tolerating behavior like that only lets it get worse!

georgia_peachy

April4bride:

When we were little, my mom told us from the beginning that the rule was, "If you ask for it, you don't get it!" - I fully intend on sticking to that rule as well.

This was my mom's rule too. I knew if I was a quiet mouse the entire time I would probably get a small treat (toy or snack) but if I said 'oh oh oh lucky charms" we were definitly not having lucky charms for breakfast that week.

acppa

niccole_e:

haha, yeah but she has 4 kids. I don't think I could side eye a mother of 4, shes a saint in my book already

This.  Anyone with 4 kids gets a little slack.   

Ivana_Stolichnaya

Typical at Target.  If it's not Target, it's Walmart either way you are guaranteed some sort of freak show.

huntington79

I may just be really old (or old fashioned) - but when I was a kid, it would have never crossed my mind to throw a temper tantrum in public - or even ask for a toy or treat. Sure, I liked to look at the toy section, but I in no way (unless I'm just forgetting) had any expectation of getting a toy/treat. I'm one of 8 kids and my mother rarely took us shopping with her, period. But, if we did get the "privilege" of getting to go to Target or Wal-mart - or even just the grocery store with her, we would never want to put that treat at risk by acting out. Just getting to be alone with her was the treat. That may sound sad/pathetic - but it was a really special thing to get to go do something with mom all by yourself. I think it is all in the way that you train your kids to behave - at home - and the expectations you give them. And in the end - it's about their respect for you and what you say. 

Like the other person said, I'll probably get flamed for this because I have no kids of my own yet. But, I was the 2nd oldest in my family and feel like I helped raise 6 children - so I have at least a little bit of experience. I think putting the toy in the basket to appease them, is kind of cruel. Isn't that basically lying to your children? It's like you're stooping to their level and have resorted to trickery - just to get what you want (for them to stop bugging/embarrassing you). One lady stated "they always remember". What happens when you get home and they find out that they don't really have the toy? Another tantrum - and you have to find something else to appease them with? And then you've implanted in their little, very impressionable mind, that they can't trust you.  

It is at least our "plan" to teach our children how they are to behave, at home and in public. If they can't do that, they don't get the privilege/treat of getting to go out. This is the plan... 

mrskilbride

My DS pitched a fit in the Dollar store about getting 2 toys vs.1 which was the agreement. We were in the check out line and I told him if he didn't lower his voice, we would leave immediately with NO toys. He kept up, so I set the toy down..threw him over my shoulder (at 4yrs old, he was too strong to try to battle with a hand hold, tug-war) and promptly walked out of the store with him screaming bloody murder. A elderly lady caught up with me in the parking lot and patted my back and said she was so proud of me for doing the right thing and looked down and my DS and shook her finger at him saying "now next time, you should listen to your mommy!" It was priceless and I've not had to tote him out of a store since!

It was only a dollar, but it was the principle....you HAVE to stick to it....any other mother/grandmother in that store will understand and respect you for sticking to your guns, even if the kid keeps screaming.

me92603

Wait til you have mulitple children.  I only have 2 and have let me son carry a power ranger around the store to stop the tantrum.  As soon as I put it back, he has a nutty, but I can deal with the nutty in the car after I have completed my shopping in peace.  And I have also run away from the cart with my other son in it to chase after my other son. 

It's not as easy as it may seem.

Tassie06

beebcaf:

I think that lady was at my Target too. Last week I saw a woman with 4 kids, 2 in the cart 2 walking just like you said. The little boy in the cart was taking off his shoes and throwing them at people. He hit me with it but I nicely picked it up and handed it back to the mom. She didn't say thanks and then put it back on him. So he took it off and threw it at me again. When I handed it to her again and mentioned that I had been hit twice she told me that if I didn't want to get hit by the shoes than to get out of throwing distance. Nice.

HA! i would have been tempted to take the shoe and throw it in the opposite direction the next time he hit me with it..