Stolen Poll: What is your biggest regret/disappointment?

eclaires

I think mine is my education...in a variety of ways.  I could have gone to much better schools for what I wanted to do, but I was scared to leave Indiana, even though I went 3 hours from home.  My friends were all going there, and it seemed like the best option.  On the other hand, I never would have met my husband if I hadn't gone there, wouldn't have Jackson, and wouldn't be an AWESOME Boilermaker.

The other regret I have is going to law school.  It was cool.  And if I had unlimited money, it would be even cooler.  But after having Jackson, I just don't have the desire to practice it.  I don't regret the education I received - a lot of it was fascinating and I LOVE that I'm educated on these topics.  I kind of wish I would have decided that being poor was awesome and gotten my masters in history, eventually my phd and taught.  Even though it would have been a long, horrible road w/ little pay.

I think MH would divorce me if I pursued that now, LOL.

Mrs.LB705

Honestly?  My only regret is that I worked so hard all through college (to pay for college) that I really didn't DO the whole college thing.  All my friends went out all the time . . . I went to work.

That being said, if I hadn't done that, I wouldn't have gotten the education I did, leading to the career I have . . . . etc.

Everything else I have done in my life though, good and bad, all shaped who I am today, so I don't regret anything!

bubu

Finishing college before I settled down.  It's so much harder now.  I regret not spending more time with my dad especially as he was dying.  That is my biggest regret.  I have so many questions and now I can't ask him.  On a sillier note, I always regret drinking that damn can of soda when I'm bloated like 5 minutes after I finish it.

femmegem

Well, I have a lot of regrets. It's just they way my brain is wired. The one that jumps to mind now is not pushing my H harder to take a job at the Smithsonian that he was offered before we moved to LA. He turned it down for various reasons (doing so would have meant giving up on academics, which he wasn't ready to do yet; he had already accepted another job in LA, although that was only a yearlong position) that in hindsight seem kind of silly. We would be in a totally different place financially and obviously his career would be set now if he had done this.

It's especially hard not to regret this at the moment as we wait to hear back once again from all the jobs he's applied to. It actually makes me feel a little sick to my stomach thinking about what could have been.

But I really try to see the positive, and the part we both focus on is the awesome experience DS has had at school this year, which obviously he wouldn't have had if we hadn't moved here. I'm not sure other teachers would have noticed his issues and figured out they were things we could help him with like his teachers now have. And he's made marked improvement already, even though he hasn't even been officially diagnosed or gotten any OT or speech therapy yet.

K-I-S-S-I-N-G

I regret not going to law school, I think I could have been a damn good lawyer. I regret screwing my credit up when I was young and dumb, it's fixed now but it was a pain for a long time. I regret losing touch with most of my high school friends.

eclaires

K-I-S-S-I-N-G:

I regret not going to law school, I think I could have been a damn good lawyer. I regret screwing my credit up when I was young and dumb, it's fixed now but it was a pain for a long time. I regret losing touch with most of my high school friends.

If it makes you feel better, law school is sucky and expensive and the job market is pretty crap...

jettagurl

Mine is school too.  I loved the school (University of Indianapolis) and the ppl I met....but my degree is useless.  I have BA in Athletic Training.  The typical ATC makes $30K in a school setting....and I hate the school setting.  I've worked for a doc in PT and in ortho clinic (clinic I love), but the pay still sux.  I wish someone would have talked me out of it and into something like accounting/business that could take me more places.  All I have to show for my degree at present is $25K in loans and a license that has been active for 2 years due to being pg/SAHM so much.  I think I'll need about 400 hrs of CEUs to be current again.....and I'm not sure it's worth it.  

I plan to go back after all the kids are in school...for accounting/business/graphic design.  It just makes me sick to think of the money spent already.  

Other than that....I'm pretty happy with everything else - even 4U4.  

 ETA:  I have to agree with KISSING on the credit thing.  I was a dip in college and took on a lot of CCs and paid for it bigtime.  I HATE that I was soooo stupid.  

breezee_bean

college, too!  I only have 2 years of my PR degree.  I really wish I had that degree.  But everything turned out really good for me despite.  But I wish I had something to hang on my office wall

jessicaclare

I regret leaving Purdue after sophomore year. My mom had just died and I wanted to be closer to my 14 year old sister so I moved back to WI. Even though I know it helped my relationship with MH too, I still always wonder what might have been.

wildfloweragain

Not being a better sister when I was younger (say from age 12-16.)  I ignored my sister and acted like it was weird if she tried to do mushy stuff like kiss me good night.  We didn't have good parents, so I could have made a difference maybe.  Now she is all messed up and there is nothing I can do for her.  I try to look out for her kids, but she is a lost cause until she WANTS to get her priorities straight.

bubu

Oh yeah screwing up my credit is another one.  My DH was in the mortgage business when it was going well and we just blew through that money thinking it was going to keep rolling in, BIG MISTAKE.  We are still trying to recover and I just think about where we would be financially if we weren't being so naive.

almostjennifer

Holyshit eclaires.  I think you are I are living parallel lives or something.  My biggest regret is going to law school (ditto your reasons verbatim), and not continuing my education in history, which is my true passion.  Yikes.  I haven't given it up yet, just waiting until the student loans are paid off from law school to go back. 

eclaires

almostjennifer:

Holyshit eclaires.  I think you are I are living parallel lives or something.  My biggest regret is going to law school (ditto your reasons verbatim), and not continuing my education in history, which is my true passion.  Yikes.  I haven't given it up yet, just waiting until the student loans are paid off from law school to go back. 

I think this is probably what I'll do, too.    I just can't give up the dream of being immersed in some obscure field of history for the rest of my life.

My other current thought is I might get my MLS and hopefully work in a law library.  I'd prefer my masters in history, but it's infinitely more realistic for me to do my MLS (esp since UT has a decent program that I can do online and is in state tuition).

luckyluvr

I regret settling for the job I have now. I had opportunities to work in event planning, but I took the easy route and stayed in my home town b/c I was too afraid to go out on my own. Now I hate my job of 9 years, and have hated it FOR 9 years. It's not exactly the kind of job you should keep if you hate it, but I need the paycheck and benefits.

wellfleet04

I wish I'd studied abroad in college.  It was hard at my college because we had significant junior year independent work and the school only had 2 programs to chose from and was very picky about other schools' programs credit transfering, so not a lot of people went, but it was possible I was just too scared of missing the social aspect of my junior year to go.

I wish I'd followed through and pushed the last little bit it would have taken to become fluent in Spanish.  I wish I hadn't stopped and lost nearly all of it.

 I wish I would have majored in biology instead of politics.

I wish I wouldn't have spent a lot of Kate's first year freaking out about her gross motor delays and stressing about EI, therapy, working with her instead of playing with her.  This is probably the biggest regret I have.  I wish I'd just enjoyed who she was and when she did things and trusted that she would be ok no matter what that wound up being.  On the flip side, because I regretted this so much I was a much better, relaxed mom to Ben (and now to Kate), so I did learn something.

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Mrs.JDD

I regret going to school for psychology and education.  I still don't know exactly what I wish I had gone for, maybe nutrition, but I'm very unhappy right now and wishing that I had a different career.  I am smart and could have gone to school for so many things...and I chose this.  If I could go back...

SumnerBride

I regret not focusing more on my education.  I was too worried about money because I hated my parents and wanted to leave the house.  Which, I did, and ended up in a MESS of credit cards to help me pay for it.  I went to school and worked two jobs.  I was a wreck.  Then I met DH. 

So, I wonder how much different my life would've been had my relationship with my folks been better.  Maybe not a regret so much as a 'what if' I guess.

KoriBrett

That I didn't take that lighting design job in Traverse City from a couple years ago. ?They begged me to come work there, I had the job. ?Turned it down because DH was scared to move.

I wish that I'd gone, with or without him. ?

mrsmorris1

I have two.  One that I didn't make more time for my girl friends in college.  I was so boy crazy that I didn't develop any long term or lifelong friendships with girls.  I wish I could do that over again. 

The other is that I wish I continued with my piano playing/lessons.  I played for 8 years as a child and again for a couple of years in college.  I can still read music but I would be so good at this point if I hadn't quit. 

sunandsand

I'm disappointed I didnt try harder with the breastfeeding thing. At 5wks old my son decided he liked bottles better than boobs so I started pumping and I'm still doing that. Hate it.

gracendantho26

Mine is that I didn't continue on to get my PsyD or PhD. I have my Masters in Psych and I really needed to continue on to my PsyD to do what I want to do....maybe one day I will. Perhaps when DS enters 2nd or 3rd grade. 

ChristyNCole1

Mine is college too - but different than everyone else's I guess. I regret that I didn't go right when I graduated high school. I got a job working for my now MIL (DH and I were high school sweethearts). I got accepted to a Fashion Design program but that would have taken me away from DH. I didn't want to do that then; I didn't want to leave him. So I stayed and got a job, at the time I didn?t know what else to do. The job I got made more than the only other thing I would of done at the point (teaching). Now, especially this week, I wish I would of finished school earlier. It's extremely hard to do with 2 kids and working part time. But I know if I would have gone, it would have been a waste of money. I have no interest in Fashion Design anymore at all. I'm really excited and thrilled at the thought of being a Nurse Practitioner. I love my classes and find them all pretty interesting, but it would be nice to not have to deal with everything else on top of them and just have school to worry about.

shopgirl78

I try hard not to have regrets...

I do wish that I would have went to my great grandmother funeral and DH's step fathers.   At the time I had just started/just got back from maternity leave and opted not  to.

I don't regret my degrees however I am over the profession and want to find something else but don't know what...

*Amy*

That I didn't study abroad. I loved college so much that I didn't want to leave campus, but now that I think about all the places I could have seen that I may not get the chance to now, I regret it.

 

That I got my bachelors and masters degree in education. I loved teaching, but I feel like as a elementary certified teacher, I am now pigeon-holed into what I can do as a career.  I am very fortunate that I was able to find my current part-time position b/c the it is a rarity.  I wish I went into something like speech/language b/c there are so many options in how you use your degree.

penguingrrl

LOL!  I have the exact opposite regret!  I was admitted to law school then turned it down in favor of studying Colonial and Native American History.  I ended up in the absolutely wrong graduate program and left that after a year and a half and now wish I had gone to law school because I could afford to work, which we desperately need while DH is completing his PhD!

Dimplz

My biggest regret is dropping out of college.

belle204

I regret not being able to just suck it up and make the move I wanted to right out of college. I was afraid of failing and things just spiraled from there. I wouldn't be where I am now more than likely so I suppose there's a reason I made the choices I did ... but I still can't help wonder how my life might have turned out. My next biggest regret would be letting stupid crap end some really good friendships over the years. Luckily, I've been able to restart one of them. Another I cleared the air with and I still miss her sometimes but we can never be friends again. :-(

belle204

I remembered I really, really, really regret not going to see my cousin or granddad before they died. She had diabetes & he had prostate cancer. I just couldn't bear to see them so pitiful looking & sick. I didn't even go to my granddad's funeral. Sh*t. Now I'm crying.

EXL311

Several of you have reminded me of some of my regrets.  I regret doing the whole charge everything to credit cards when I was in college.  I regret not studying abroad while I was in college.  I regret not dating more before I met DH just for the experience.  I didn't call my grandma nearly as much as I should have and she passed away last March.  I regret not having another child sooner as DH and I are both in med school now and it's more difficult to figure it all out, plus medical issues.  Hopefully if you ask me in a few years I won't say I regret going to medical school but we'll see.

sarahjared

Taking DD to see ILs instead of my grandma when she was dying.  We thought we were going to have time to see her but didn't.  Long story but my aunts will never let me forget it.  Like I don't feel bad enough about it already.

ridesbuttons

I regret not going to visit a dear family friend who was suffering from ALS and made his goal of coming up to the cottage.  I decided I was too tired to visit him the afternoon he arrived, opting instead to let him settle in and visit the next morning.  He died that night.

I think of that decision often when I think something can wait, especially when it comes to seeing someone.  

Glendi2.0

Grrr. I get pissed just thinking about it. Mine is not going to the Athens Olympics in 2004. My brother and wife were living in Athens at the time (he worked for the State Department) and had amazing access to the venues and events, but DH and I just couldn't get our acts together to book flights and get the time off work, so we just kind of blew it off. I's always said that when the Olympics came to Greece (I'm 100% Greek), I'd be the first one in line, and for no real reason, I just broke that promise to myself. It literally makes me angry thinking about it.

hopefulmom

I regret working my last couple of years of high school and not having FUN.

I regret getting married at 18 (although I don't regret having my kids).  I did continue college (I was going to a business university...which I did graduate from).

I regret not going into teaching instead of business.

I agree with most people about the law degree.  Around here (where I live) many people say they go into law because it is an "easy" degree, get their law degree but can't get a job.  I have 2 nephews - one was a corporate lawyer until the company downsized (now he teaches high school and college law in FL) and the other is a district manager for a pharmaceutical company.

Note:  I'm not saying it is "easy"...I would hate all the reading involved.  That is just the reason I've been given when I asked why they went the "law" route.  I'm sure it is different in different states.  Plus, the bar exam has got to be brutal.  Didn't  Kennedy, Jr. take it like 3-4 time before passing?

eclaires

hopefulmom:

Note:  I'm not saying it is "easy"...I would hate all the reading involved.  That is just the reason I've been given when I asked why they went the "law" route.  I'm sure it is different in different states.  Plus, the bar exam has got to be brutal.  Didn't  Kennedy, Jr. take it like 3-4 time before passing?

I believe he took NY's bar exam which is, I think, typically a difficult one?  I'm not sure though.

Law school is interesting - it's not a breeze, but I do think it's a professional advanced degree that is something you can work hard at and do well - and people think they can make a lot of money from it with a 3 year degree, which makes it "easier" than some other professional fields w/ advanced degrees.  I think it's something you can force yourself to excel in w/ hard work, unlike med school for example, where I think you have to have a natural aptitude for science.  This is JMO, obviously, and I could be wrong.