Struggling with working after LO...

SGolden7310

So, I have always said that I always wanted to work, even when we have children.  I worked hard to earn my master's degree and I like my career.  But, now that I'm pregnant and getting closer to LO being here, the less I want to work after!  I know that there are some great day cares around here and she will be fine - but I don't know if I will be!  I just can't imagine dropping her off at the beginning of the day and going off to deal with the stress at work. I want to be with her and have her be my main focus!  My DH and I have already talked about this a million times and know that I should/need to continue to work but I'm struggling and wondered if anyone on here had some advice for a soon to be new mom who doesn't want to go back to work!

svtarr05

I went to work fulltime when LO was 8 weeks old. It was so hard to leave her, my DH works nights so DD is with him during the day and then me during the evenings and nights. It was really hard in the beginning because I was exhausted from working during the day and DD would be super fusy in the evening and then DH was tired from work and didn't help out a lot at night. Once we all got the hang of things it got easier. The time that you have together is more about quality. If I only get a few hours each night I want them to be full of love and playing. And the weekends are so special now. You just have to find the balance between everything.

wheelenl

My best advice is, be prepared for anything. You really have no idea how you might feel once LO comes. I always thought I wanted to be a SAHM until I tried it for a year. I probably was a little bit hasty in my decision to quit. It all worked out for the best, but I was a lousy SAHM.

This sounds really dumb now, but I always thought most women who worked either had to, or at least thought they had to (to finance their overpriced lifestyle). I was SO CLUELESS.

Anyway, so be prepared to be dying to go back by 12 weeks. Be prepared to want to work PT if you can. Be prepared to not want to work at all. 

And by that, I mean try to have a contingency plan for all of those scenarios if you can. 

If you're spiritual/religious, pray about it, and try to talk to others in both camps.

NicoleWI

Don't do anything now. Wait and see how you will feel after being home w/ baby. Personally, I LOVED Maternity leave and didn't want to go back, and I don't really love being a working mom. But, everyone is different. As PP said, some people can't wait to go back to work.

CTJune06

I agree with what others said...you really can't know how you're going to feel until you're in the situation. I thought I wanted to continue working full time and after being back for a bit, I ended up changing to a part time schedule (I realize I'm super lucky to have the opportunity to do this). It was so hard to leave DD in the beginning. But, now that she's 14 months- I totally can see the benefits of her being at daycare (she goes 2x a week). And honestly, I don't think I could stay home full time with her now. I like my job, enjoy working with smart and interesting people and find it challenging in many good ways. Enjoy your pregnancy and your maternity leave- it's such a special time! Somehow you do figure it out and make it all work.

CA_EAM

In my head (ie fantasy) I love being a working mom.  In reality I am hating it and struggling big time.  But I don't have a choice, I have to be here.  But at the same time I am glad I don't have a choice, because I believe its a tough one and really a lose/lose situation.  I am full of contradictions.  Sorry.

Just wait and see how things go.  There is no one right answer.  I think your happiness and success at making it work are totally situational.