Trying to Get Pregnant

Being happy for the "graduates"

A very good friend of mine just found out that she's pregnant. We both started TTC at the same time and were kind of each other's "support system" through the whole thing. Of course, I'm so very thrilled for her, she's ecstatic and I know she's going to be a great mommy!

 ... But I can't help being super jealous/a little bummed out in the back of my mind.

I feel horrible for feeling like that. How do you girls deal?!?

Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml

Re: Being happy for the "graduates"

  • I consider myself very lucky. I am able to separate my friends' happy news from my own lack of happy news in that department. Focus on how happy you are for your friend.
  • It's totally normal to feel like this. How do I deal ? Beer

    "Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all." -- Dale Carnegie
    "Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time." --Thomas A. Edison
  • Loading the player...
  • By looking forward to snuggling sweet little babies whether they are my own or not.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • I found out in the last two weeks five people I'm friends with or related to.  How do I deal??  I joked with my mom that everybody's doing it.  I want to fit in!  I just try to be as happy and I can for them knowing my time will come someday.

    TTC since July 2009. Dx MFI & LPD. 
    IUI#1&2&3 (2011 & 2012) BFN
    IUI#4 1/23/13 on 75iu x9 Follistim = BFP then chem preg m/c (Feb 2013)
    IUI#5 BFN (April 2013)
    IVF w/ICSI Oct. 2, 2012 - 13R, 11M, 7F, 1 frozen blast 4BB grade - - - FET Nov 15, 2013
    BFP! Beta 1:104 @ 10dp6dt, Beta 2:178 @ 12dp6dt,  beta 3:366 @ 14dp6dt
    Saw heartbeat twice before missed M/C at 8w3d on 12/27/13, missing my little angel boy
    JUNE 2014 IVF#2;  5R, 2M, 1F Three day transfer 6/7.  Beta 6/18 - BFN
    Child Free Now?

    My Blog


  • As long as you don't let it affect your friendship with her or how you treat her, it's totally normal to feel a little jealousy.

    Onward and upward. Good luck TTC!

    Our sweet girl is 3!

    Lilypie - (R7Ux)

  • imageMrs. Mo:
    It's totally normal to feel like this. How do I deal ? Beer


    AlternaTickers - Cool, free Web tickers
  • imageMrs. Mo:
    It's totally normal to feel like this. How do I deal ? Beer

    Yes to the Beer

    image  image
    Carina 12.28.2010 | Aurelia 9.23.12 | Chart - Round 3
  • It is normal to feel that way.  I know I went through it a lot when all of my friends and cousins were getting pregnant and I wasn't. 

    But then, I thought of all the babies i was going to be able to play with, hold, and buy things for and that made me much happier. 

    And now, all those people that I was happy for when it was their turn, are supporting me now that it is my turn. 

    Have a drink and know that these feelings will pass!


    A kiss he will never forget- Disney World 2014

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


    Pregnancy Ticker

  • Drinks
    aCg 3.1.07 | hCr 5.5.11
  • YesDrinks

    Its normal to feel bummed out.  I truly am happy for all of my friends that are expecting and know they will be just as happy for me when my time comes!

    *DS born at 31 weeks due to pPROM- November 2010-our little miracle! 

    *TFAS since May 2014 
    *Early miscarriage-Sept 2014

  • imageMrs. Mo:
    It's totally normal to feel like this. How do I deal ? Beer


    But seriously--it's hard to see people get KU, especially on accident or super fast, but I'm always happy about new babies. I try to focus on the baby rather than the mama. That makes it easier for me...

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • How long have you both been trying? Seeing as this is your first post, an intro would have covered this info if you plan on mingling on here.
    Keeping my fingers crossed for my BFP Buddy STL34!!! CafeMom Tickers
  • My family has 3 9month old triplets and a 6 month old singleton. When we started TTC- they were already pregnant but the delivery (without our own positive) was a little rough. When we started TTC our due date would have been quite close to the others so every time I see them- learning to sit up, eating baby food- milestones passing by- there's a part of me that's incredibly sad that we're not a part of that.

    I volunteered to babysit one day a week (all four share caregivers) as good natured "practice" for our own... at the time expecting that we'd obviously be pregnant very very soon- we'd been trying for months but we were still under  year and there was no reason to beleive that it wouldn't happen for us soon...

    And now that we're in our 19th cycle I'm having to come to terms with the fact that it really might not be happening for us "soon". That my best friend who was "a year or so away" from trying when we started trying- might surprise us any day now with a pregnancy. That we've only got 2 more chances for a 2010 baby based on my usual cycle. That our child is going to be well behind his/her 4 young cousins instead of part of babypalooza.

    How do I deal? I hug a baby. I adore them. I focus on the fact that these babies are amazing and how much I love babies in general. I compartmentalize. I cry like a child on cycle day 1, let myself mourn and find some glimmer of hope about the next cycle- as simple as "Wouldn't it be awesome to have the winter baby we wanted- next EDD is 12/1/10." or as complicated as "I'll adjust my B6 and see if I can squeeze one more day out of my luteal phase". You can't make the "I wish" go away- all you can do is let them know the important things- that you think they'll be a great mom, that their kids are adorable, and even admit in a light manner that you're terribly jealous.

    Friends for 15 years. Married 8. TTC since January 2009
    2010 Diagnosis: Anovulation and Severe MFI
    2011 Treatment:
    IVF w/ICSI #1 Antagonist: 2 blasts - c/p - BFN 04.22
    FET #1: 1 blast/1 early blast - BFP 06.22 - m/c 06.30 @6w0d
    07-11 RPL: MTHFR C677T Heterozygous & Slightly elevated ACLA IgM
    FET #2: 1 morula - BFN: 9.02

    January '12: IVF #2
    Started BCP and Metformin (New!) 12-14 for stimming in January

    Dum spiro, spero.
    ?SAIF/PAIF/PgAL/PAL always welcome?
  • I understand your feelings. I too have felt the ugly, green-eyed monster of jealousy emerge when someone announces their good news. The way that I've dealt before is to create something for them. Maybe get them a stuffed animal for the new arrival or a baby scrapbook.

    That way I feel like I am contributing something positive and it makes me feel more benevolent to the situation. Otherwise I feel like a big ol' crab about it. 


This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards