I got my degree in Broadcasting and worked for 20-some years in television news. Lived my dream of working in a top 20 market. An amazing time and incredible experiences, but by my late 30s, it was fast becoming apparent that I needed to do something else. As I grew older, I became more disillusioned with the business and the politics of it all. Not to mention the direction the modern day media is taking. But I digress!
Always dreamed I'd find my "Mr. Right." A lot of praying and patience finally paid off and I'm very fortunate to have met my husband. I'm now surprised to find I'm a SAHM. NOT what I envisioned, but I'm incredibly thankful that I married a man who is smart, well educated and well employed so that I can stay home with the baby.
I'm doing the job I wanted (I would love to see exotics but doing shelter medicine is a fine trade-off for me), have a great man and amazing friends, live in a fantastic city, started a family when I wasn't sure we would be able to - I have so much to be thankful for. I am really excited that the end of his training is just 2 years and 3 months away...and with it finally comes financial security (a house, a car that isn't a piece of crap - it's just stuff but, well, you know...).
15-20 years ago when I thought of myself as an adult I did have a slightly different picture. There are personal flaws that I can't believe I am still struggling with as I approach 40. Why have I not conquered certain things like being more patient, not putting my foot in my mouth....I get so frustrated with myself sometimes.
This is a great post and question! I *did* fulfill what I wanted to be--but I think I'm having a mid-life crisis, because now I'm not sure I want to be here. And I'm not sure what I want to do. I have a master's in a field different from what I do now--education--and while I used it for a few years, I'm not really using it now. I have visions of doing something completely different, something that'd require another degree, but I don't know how practical that is. So basically I'm completely conflicted.
I did, however, realize that I really love being a mom--I never was one to fantasize about having babies, but now that I have one and we've settled in, I am overwhelmed with how awesome she is and I want more.
I am nothing like or where I thought I would be.
As a child I trained as a ballet dancer for ten years. Once the academy said it was time to commit - dance full time and leave regular school my parents decided to stop my training. To this day I wonder "what if."
As for my DH, I had always dated guys who could be in a JCrew catelog. Very preppy and DH was completely different. Now after 16 years I have completely rubbed off on him and he is my well-dressed and very dapper husband.
I never thought I would be a mom or that I would love my son as much as I do. I never thought I would gain as much weight as I have.
I was able to sing professionally and make a living at it for 20 years, travel, etc - I feel very lucky. There were times that I had dreams of "making it big" and getting a recording contract, but I look at a closet full of long dresses I used to wear every night and I don't miss it, nor would I trade anything for being a Mama now. She truly is my dream come true... (and DH too!)
Mari - there is nothing wrong with going where life takes you - I think this is a beautiful way to live.
I wanted to be a stay at home mom who was a famous artist. I need to get back to art... I've let that go for SO long. Not sure why. And unless we win the lottery, I won't ever be a SAHM. C'est la vie.
I ended up with someone else's dream job. I wouldn't do anything differently only because it brought me to where I am today, and with Margaux and Rom, but if I could guarantee both of those things?
I would take a firmer hand in saying "no" to projects that didn't interest me. My design specialization is technical design, weapon balance and work on shooters, when I hate hate HATE shooters. I feel like every first person shooter that goes out with my name in the credits eats a little more of my soul. I'd decide against the money and for the games that I enjoy, if I could do it over. I let myself be pressured into the direction my career took.
snwfields:Not even a little bit....I would absolutely do things differently but I am not sure how or what. Sadly at 37 I still have no idea what I want to do with my life career wise. The 21 year old me would be really disappointed in the now me. ( other than fletcher and DH of course). I am thinking about going back to school to get yet another degree......not sure though.
This answer is almost exactly what I would write. I don't like where I am in most ways, but I also don't know what it is I DO want. I would have loved to have been a professional singer, but I lack "star quality," so that wasn't a realistic goal. Still, I've thought about going back to school to get a music degree. But besides that, if I could quit my job today, I'm not sure what I would do for work.
I'll let you know when I get there (grown up, that is)
My favorite quote is from George Eliot.
"It is never too late to be what you might have been"
Daises, I so agree with you - it is never too late for dreams....sometimes dreams change and sometimes you realize you are already living a pretty great dream!
I think you are all rockstars
I'm a little late to the game ... but, am I who I wanted to be? um, yes, sort of ... i've always wanted to be in the design field. Went to college, got a degree in interior design with a smidge in architecture. My entire family (including my parents) have owned either restaurants an/or hotels so i've always been in the hospitality industry as well. For the past 14yrs i've worked for 3 top and very well known European lighting manufacturers that light up places like Disney parks, Eiffel Tower, national accounts (Starbucks, etc) and so forth. I've been everything from a project manager to currently an Inside sales & customer service manager. When I left my last job for this one, there was buzz about it! I felt kinda special when I heard about the entire US talking about me, from my agents in SF to other agents in Chicago. It made me realize that I have done something important in my life and I was proud ... and I am now done! I've accomplished what "I" feel is enough.
DH and I spoke and before the twins are home I will become a SAHM. I was an only child so the thought of me even having kids was very frightening, but I figured other moms have done it so why can't I? We feel that me staying home will be the best for the family. and who knows what will happen 5 years from now? I may open up my own lighting agency. )
I would do things the same, but would write more everyday. I would have published a novel before DD came along.
Other than that, things turned out pretty well. I *love* the fact that I didn't have a kid until 38, and had a chance to pursue my passions while I was still young.