When to worry about shyness and what can I do?

mauceddie

DD1 is very very shy. She hides behind me, under my coat, etc. when in unusual situations. She says she is afraid to go to dance class, swim class, etc. I am worried for her going to kindergarten in the fall. Is there anything I can do to help her? She's been going to daycare for the past 18 months and has gotten much better but still hides under my coat at drop off many days.

TIA

snickerdoodle27

I was very shy as a child, did much the same as your dd does now. I can remember in pre-school I'd have to go sit on the teacher's lap for a bit before I could play with the rest of  the kids. I got over it, but was always shy/quiet in school. Can you take your dd to meet her teacher and see the classroom before school starts? That could help. Also discuss it with her teacher ahead of time and see if she has any suggestions, since i'm sure they deal with this kind of thing all the time.

katesmom73

I don't know if this is the right answer or not but I was a painfully shy child so I can only tell you what I wish my parents had done.  This could be a long process (as in years) but I would continually and consistently put her in new situations but at the same time, try not to push too much which will only make her dread the next time.  Stay with her as long as she needs to support her but don't let her back out. She'll gain more confidence with each new situation.  I was so afraid to do new things but once I did it once, I was usually fine.  A lot of times, my Mom would let me make the call and I'd chicken out every time. 

Something else that might help when it comes to classes is to get there early so she can scope out the place and meet the teacher.  This will make her feel more in control of the situation.